Lily1918

Your HP isn't speaking... your addict is.

(delete)

hopeful4

I will gently say that in your career and with your knowledge to think this does not affect your DD is naieve.

XXX

Sungrl

You really don't think he is harming you? With all do respect (and no bitterness here) he is emotionally "harming" you big time. You are a basket case, his every move is scrutinized and analyzed by you. You fight about his dishonesty. He has taken you over, you are losing yourself to him. If you want to stay, that is of course your choice, but then you just need to let it go. Whatever he is doing, let it happen, you really have no say in any of it.
There is no trust and it will only get worse for you.

rose

Finding the paper in the bathroom would mean dope and gear in your home Karrets, not to be nasty Karrets, but this is grounds to have your daughter taken out of your home.You are her protector and to wait till harm comes then deal with it is in no way protecting her.

Twofish

Dear Karrets,
Please listen to what the members are saying. Just listen...
You found some "evidence" that appears to be addiction or drug related.
Perhaps your HP allowed you to see this so you can protect yourself and your daughter?
You asked and we responded. Please take what advice you think you can use and leave the rest. Sometimes honesty hurts. Please, no bitterness was spoken.
Pray to your HP ASAP. Your safety and well being and that of your sweet daughter are
What needs to be protected.
Respectfully,
TF

allforcnm

I agree maybe these signs are a way to confirm what you know is happening with him, and then finding a way to reconcile within yourself the actions your taking. I also like what Greeteachday wrote because we can only do what we feel in our heart, and what we can live with. We each have to make decisions in our own time and our own way.

I think addicts do feel love... of course it depends on the degree of addiction as to how this presents itself. I would never say a person isn't capable of loving because they use drugs and are addicted. If you read over on the substance abuse forum I think there is a pretty clear picture of love among families and significant others.. People cant always quit just because they love someone... its a complex medical problem...never go down the road if he just loved me enough... I think this does lead to bitterness.

Prayers that you find peace, and the message your meant to see from your HP becomes clear.

Karrets

I have decided after posting this last thread that it will be my last. I have found some of the posts hurtful and cruel and sungrl just because your partner didn't want you does not give you the right to call me a basket case. I find that deeply offending when you don't know me and also the job I do. I have taken what I need. for those who go in too heavy on people's posts when they are still in the thick of it because you have found strength to move on remember you went through it. Judging and criticising is not why I came here.

bellanoviella

Agreed.. when they were going through their troubling times they wouldn't have wanted to hear what they're saying. I also agree that tough love hurts.. the truth hurts.. but that's not what you were asking for in this post. You wanted to know that it's okay that you're staying.. like Chino said. And it's perfectly fine. You're smart.. You'll know when it's time to get out. And if you have hope that things will get better, then good for you. There's nothing wrong with being hopeful, as long as you take care of yourself too and don't completely lose yourself in the madness. And since you and I are quite close now, I know you're still doing okay

You're making the conscience choice to stay, you're aware of what's going on, you aren't naive. You're just giving him another chance, so what..

You gave me advice when I had issues with my ex and when I left him.. You know I'll give you the same advice.. If you're happy staying with him and hoping to see change, then enjoy those moments.. You deserve to be happy in however you find it

hopeful4

Karrets, I would never say anything out of meanness or spite. I agree that we all have to go through it. I think for myself, the alarm of thinking that none of this affects your DD is what set me to post. If I offended you in any way I am truly sorry.

As always with any of these posts, take what helps and leave the rest.

I have genuine concern and will pray to my HP for you and your entire family.

XXX

mejo

Karrets, I truly hope you do not stop posting. I am sorry your feelings are hurt, but I love your responses you provide when helping others.