How to let go?
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 13,497
Originally Posted by EnglishGarden 
The child should be removed from her custody and placed in protective care. The baby is in grave danger and could die in her custody. If you being her enabler also enables her to keep her child, then in spite of your deep caring for the child, you are contributing to the danger, not lessening it, by being on call to step in whenever the mother is drugged, violent, and potentially psychotic.
A detailed letter to CPS--so everything is in writing and is dated--accompanied by a phone call to CPS, is the highest priority. There is an endangered child, and intervention on the child's behalf should not be delayed.
You are not qualified to rescue the child, it is necessary to step out of the way and let professionals do their job. But as witness to the ongoing neglect and abuse of the child, it is your high moral responsibility to alert those who can make a real difference in whether or not the baby survives.
Your friendship with her, and your sadness about what might have been, can be processed and grieved later. Right now, action is necessary. Nothing else matters so much as the life of the child.
A detailed letter to CPS--so everything is in writing and is dated--accompanied by a phone call to CPS, is the highest priority. There is an endangered child, and intervention on the child's behalf should not be delayed.
You are not qualified to rescue the child, it is necessary to step out of the way and let professionals do their job. But as witness to the ongoing neglect and abuse of the child, it is your high moral responsibility to alert those who can make a real difference in whether or not the baby survives.
Your friendship with her, and your sadness about what might have been, can be processed and grieved later. Right now, action is necessary. Nothing else matters so much as the life of the child.
The child will be passed by, just as your feelings were, when momma decides to party or bring home strangers (who could do countless bad things to this baby as well).
I am glad you care about this child. You can do something very important here, that no one else would be able to do, considering what you know. Please, take action for this childs safety and wellbeing.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: ontario, canada
Posts: 540
You made the right decision distancing yourself from her. Her little boy however has no choice at this point . Please call CPS, if you haven't done so already. That child is being put at risk. She can't take care of herself , how could she possibly provide a safe, happy enviroment for this little one . As painful as it is , is is our duty to report , and protect these little ones that have no voice in there living situations . You say she can be a good mother ? Mothering is a full time job. She has shown violence towards you, neglect not answering the phone when her child was ill ( she pawned him off on you ) at that point the drugs & alcohol were took presidence . You are no longer in her life , who is this child being pawned off on now and what is he being exposed too. Please report her .
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