Letting go works
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
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Letting go works
Letting go works.
Initially, letting go brought me peace. When things got really scary with our son, I had already let go and left it to God. If I hadn't, I'm not sure I would have survived the beating/shooting incident, the suicide threats, the homelessness, the sheer sadness of it all.
Eventually, letting go helped me to stay out of God's way while He did what he needed to do with our son. Spiritual awakening? Perhaps. He went into a long term program at the Salvation Army.....and stuck with it.
As our son's graduation from the SA-ARC approached, I had a bit if a worry binge.....and I had to renew my commitment to let go again. I prayed and asked God to calm me down. It worked and I stopped worrying about what would happen post graduation from the program. You know what they say....if you pray why worry.....if you worry why pray.
He was out of the program for one day and secured some yard work for a friend for a couple of days. And then, within five days, was offered a job by someone in NA who has known him for some time and was impressed with the work he's done on himself while in the SA.
He's now employed, attending meetings, and working toward getting his financial affairs in order.
If I had still been hovering over him, telling him what to do, trying to control things......perhaps God wouldn't have had "full access" to him.
Letting go........letting God......staying calm.......taking care of me. I've learned a lot in the last few years by working the program I wished he would work. It does work. I am worth it. And so is he.
I'll keep working on me.....one day at a time.
Thank you God.
gentle hugs
ke
Initially, letting go brought me peace. When things got really scary with our son, I had already let go and left it to God. If I hadn't, I'm not sure I would have survived the beating/shooting incident, the suicide threats, the homelessness, the sheer sadness of it all.
Eventually, letting go helped me to stay out of God's way while He did what he needed to do with our son. Spiritual awakening? Perhaps. He went into a long term program at the Salvation Army.....and stuck with it.
As our son's graduation from the SA-ARC approached, I had a bit if a worry binge.....and I had to renew my commitment to let go again. I prayed and asked God to calm me down. It worked and I stopped worrying about what would happen post graduation from the program. You know what they say....if you pray why worry.....if you worry why pray.
He was out of the program for one day and secured some yard work for a friend for a couple of days. And then, within five days, was offered a job by someone in NA who has known him for some time and was impressed with the work he's done on himself while in the SA.
He's now employed, attending meetings, and working toward getting his financial affairs in order.
If I had still been hovering over him, telling him what to do, trying to control things......perhaps God wouldn't have had "full access" to him.
Letting go........letting God......staying calm.......taking care of me. I've learned a lot in the last few years by working the program I wished he would work. It does work. I am worth it. And so is he.
I'll keep working on me.....one day at a time.
Thank you God.
gentle hugs
ke
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Colorado
Posts: 577
Ahhh....Kindeyes....leave it to you to reduce me to tears before work!! Thank you for this loving, gentle reminder. I am so happy for your son...he must feel so proud of himself. He's worked so hard and is now seeing the fruition of his efforts. BUT...You!!! Just look at you!!! Whether you know it or not the words you share here.....the experience, strength and hope you provide....shows me and others what the fruition of OUR labors will be....for ourselves. Serenity, empowerment and hope are all on the menu....we just have to make the decision that that is what we'll be having! Have a wonderful day! Your post has been a great start to mine!
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 83
Amen to that, Kindeyes. I, too, have witnessed the miracle that can happen when we let go and let God. God picked up my son the minute I let go - hardest on me to remove myself from my son's life when he was active. But God was right there the whole time.
My 23 y/I son is 6 mos clean, living in SLE, working full time, acting like a grown man, and even he gives credit to God. He co-chairs a weekly meeting for AA, works with newcomers to his SLE, and has enrolled in community college part time to study psychology. Most importantly, he is a loving, committed daddy to his 2 y/o daughter, leading a good life by example. I am so proud of him. I am in awe of the blessings that can be bestowed upon him and us by God.
To all the moms who are burdened with taking really tough steps with their addicted son/daughter, believe me when I say it could be a life or death situation. When I told my son not to come to our house, not to contact me in anyway if he remained an addict, I thought that would kill me. Turns out, that helped save my son. When my son got his first paycheck, he told me he wanted to start paying me back for all the financial losses he had caused - wrecked car, insurance/car payment bailouts, etc. He said he could afford only $40. Despite my initial reaction to hold off and get other finances straight first, he did mail the check to me. On the memo section of the check he wrote, "for saving my life."
Thank you, God.
My 23 y/I son is 6 mos clean, living in SLE, working full time, acting like a grown man, and even he gives credit to God. He co-chairs a weekly meeting for AA, works with newcomers to his SLE, and has enrolled in community college part time to study psychology. Most importantly, he is a loving, committed daddy to his 2 y/o daughter, leading a good life by example. I am so proud of him. I am in awe of the blessings that can be bestowed upon him and us by God.
To all the moms who are burdened with taking really tough steps with their addicted son/daughter, believe me when I say it could be a life or death situation. When I told my son not to come to our house, not to contact me in anyway if he remained an addict, I thought that would kill me. Turns out, that helped save my son. When my son got his first paycheck, he told me he wanted to start paying me back for all the financial losses he had caused - wrecked car, insurance/car payment bailouts, etc. He said he could afford only $40. Despite my initial reaction to hold off and get other finances straight first, he did mail the check to me. On the memo section of the check he wrote, "for saving my life."
Thank you, God.
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 793
Double Amen, KE, for the awesome reminder that once we decide to let go we have to keep doing it for it to work. I was just about to hop on the worry train this morning--thanks for stopping me on the tracks.
I am so happy to read of your son's progress. Blessings on you both!
I am so happy to read of your son's progress. Blessings on you both!
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
Serenity, empowerment and hope are all on the menu....
Yes YES! Serenity, empowerment and hope......good stuff. All of the sons and daughters (and the mothers here on SR) are in my prayers daily. Letting go was the hardest thing I have ever done........my prayer to God was simply "whatever is your will.....I will accept it with grace". That is still my prayer.....it hasn't changed. Your dear son is in my prayers. Take care of you.
On the memo section of the check he wrote, "for saving my life."
Now THAT brought ME to tears! Thank you for sharing your ESH. You and I both know that he saved his own life....with help from his HP and a loving mother who had the wisdom to step out of the way and let those two develop a relationship.
gentle hugs
ke
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Originally Posted by GardenMama 
Double Amen, KE, for the awesome reminder that once we decide to let go we have to keep doing it for it to work. I was just about to hop on the worry train this morning--thanks for stopping me on the tracks.
I am so happy to read of your son's progress. Blessings on you both!
I am so happy to read of your son's progress. Blessings on you both!
Sending up special prayers for your dear daughter (and you) this morning. Glad you didn't go into worry-mode......trust the process.
gentle hugs
ke
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Okay, this mama brought tissues for everyone, this thread just melted my heart. Miracles happen every day and every day they are clean is a miracle. It just warms my heart every time another one makes it to recovery. Life is good, God is good, and we all need to stay out of His way.
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Dallas TX
Posts: 2,282
You brought happiness to ALOT of people today with your news, KE.
(contrary to some popular beliefs, the hokey-pokey is NOT what it's
all about.............posts like yours are what it's all about!)
Thank You
(contrary to some popular beliefs, the hokey-pokey is NOT what it's
all about.............posts like yours are what it's all about!)
Thank You
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Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 923
Kindeyes...you brought such hope to me today. Thank you. I just 'managed' to let go of my daughter. Have had to do it for three different daughters now...two made it through...this one brought all the fear from he** up...and it has been a struggle. My hp, who I call God, is back...the part about let Go, let God, staying calm, taking care of me...just resonated with my soul. Thank you.
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Join Date: Dec 2007
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My hp, who I call God, is back
Your dear daughter will be in my prayers.....and so will you. This stuff is really hard on a mother's heart.
gentle hugs
ke
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