AAA Membership
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
AAA Membership
I was a member of AAA for a very long time. I guess there were a lot of benefits to belonging but I couldn't really understand what those benefits were. I kept paying my dues....even though they were very expensive (sleepless nights, gut wrenching fear, inability to concentrate, financial hardship, unbearable anxiety, compromised values, uncontrollable anger, irrational behavior, etc.)
I go to meetings and the rooms are full of people who belong to AAA. I come here to SR and there is a large contingent of members. It's an extremely popular, yet not very exclusive, club.
AAA stands for Anxiety And Angish. And I wonder......what is the value of membership? Is it so great that people continue paying those exorbitant membership dues indefinitely? What are the benefits of membership? Do the benefits outweigh the cost of membership?
I'm so glad that I dropped out. I forfeited my membership. Occasionally I get "advertisements" attempting to lure me back in to paying those high dues. But I've enjoyed my status as a non-member for while now and I'm not easily lured back into the club.
It's a choice. Can someone here please explain to me the benefits of membership to AAA (Anxiety And Anguish). I can't remember why I kept my membership for so long.
gentle hugs
ke
I go to meetings and the rooms are full of people who belong to AAA. I come here to SR and there is a large contingent of members. It's an extremely popular, yet not very exclusive, club.
AAA stands for Anxiety And Angish. And I wonder......what is the value of membership? Is it so great that people continue paying those exorbitant membership dues indefinitely? What are the benefits of membership? Do the benefits outweigh the cost of membership?
I'm so glad that I dropped out. I forfeited my membership. Occasionally I get "advertisements" attempting to lure me back in to paying those high dues. But I've enjoyed my status as a non-member for while now and I'm not easily lured back into the club.
It's a choice. Can someone here please explain to me the benefits of membership to AAA (Anxiety And Anguish). I can't remember why I kept my membership for so long.
gentle hugs
ke
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Colorado
Posts: 577
I love this! I also was a card packing member of this club for a long time and can say without a doubt it's not worth maintaining the membership. I am now so busy learning to fix my own flats by reading and attending meetings I barely have time to worry if others are maintaining their vehicles appropriately. I don't need AAA anymore. If I am lost I can simply call upon Onstar (my higher power) and I'm back on the road in no time! Thanks for making me smile this morning Kindeyes!
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
Originally Posted by mstrust 
i would love to relinquish my membership. unfortunately, i feel like i keep being automatically re-enrolled. how do i quit??
But when we're ready, we can work on our own membership cancellation. For me, it was a combination of private counseling, lots of reading, doing what others who had cancelled their membership suggested, daily meditation, and going to meetings (some of those things I still do and will continue to do to prevent me from joining that AAA membership again).
I'm still waiting for someone to remind me.....what are the benefits of AAA membership?
gentle hugs
ke
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Originally Posted by Kindeyes
I'm still waiting for someone to remind me.....what are the benefits of AAA membership?
Anxiety and Anguish are my middle names!! Or they used to be.
They served me well because they scared away small children and anyone who tried to mess with this mama.
They served me well because no matter what my problem was, I could always say "I am soooo Anxious, I just can't stand it" and they would accept that as a good reason for my bad behaviour.
My final experience with Anxiety and Anguish was when AAA-Annie went to the crackhouse totally freaking out and threatened to kick down the door if they didn't send my son out....I was really really good at this AAA because I scared even crack house people enough to make my son come out...it didn't do a lick of good and the moment I left for home, he left to go back...but the AAA performance was award worthy!
Okay, so maybe membership did have a price and that price was my life..it almost took my very soul. It ate me alive and followed me everywhere and robbed me of sleep for years and years...how clever those AAA's are, they KNOW that without sleep I'm a life member.
One day I just stopped, a total mess and I told God I could not do this one more day. He revoked my membership and banned me for life. Turns out, all I had to do was ask and hand over the card. Who knew?
Thanks Kindeyes, it's good sometimes to revisit those awful times because it helps me feel so grateful for where I am today.
Hugs.
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Join Date: Dec 2007
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Ok Ann.....lemme get this straight.
These are the Benefits of AAA as I took them from your post:
1) Allows us to scare little children and drug dealers.
2) Excuses our bad behavior
3) Gives us bravado but limits our rational thinking
4) Forfeits our soul and dignity to the disease of addiction....without touching the stuff.
5) Allows us to operate on little or no sleep.
I will add a few more benefits to AAA membership:
6) Allows us to experience unrelenting emotional pain and robs us of all joy.
7) Makes us think it's ok to be emotionally, psychologically, and sometimes physically abused.
8) Helps us to think it's ok to expose our children to the irrational behaviors.
9) Makes us feel that our love is all powerful and able to cure a disease.
10) Causes those who love us great pain as they watch us struggle with our AAA membership.
Sounds to me like AAA Membership isn't all it's cracked up to be. Each and every person here has the key to cancelling their membership......thanks for helping me to remember that I never want to join AAA again.
Thanks Ann!
gentle hugs
ke
These are the Benefits of AAA as I took them from your post:
1) Allows us to scare little children and drug dealers.
2) Excuses our bad behavior
3) Gives us bravado but limits our rational thinking
4) Forfeits our soul and dignity to the disease of addiction....without touching the stuff.
5) Allows us to operate on little or no sleep.
I will add a few more benefits to AAA membership:
6) Allows us to experience unrelenting emotional pain and robs us of all joy.
7) Makes us think it's ok to be emotionally, psychologically, and sometimes physically abused.
8) Helps us to think it's ok to expose our children to the irrational behaviors.
9) Makes us feel that our love is all powerful and able to cure a disease.
10) Causes those who love us great pain as they watch us struggle with our AAA membership.
Sounds to me like AAA Membership isn't all it's cracked up to be. Each and every person here has the key to cancelling their membership......thanks for helping me to remember that I never want to join AAA again.
Thanks Ann!
gentle hugs
ke
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
Ann
The thing that got me for a very long time is that....I thought membership was mandatory. I didn't realize that it was optional. Like you....I wish someone had told me a long time ago.
gentle hugs
ke
The thing that got me for a very long time is that....I thought membership was mandatory. I didn't realize that it was optional. Like you....I wish someone had told me a long time ago.
gentle hugs
ke
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Minneapolis
Posts: 924
11.) lots of adrenaline rushes and other brain chemistry washes from the ride
12.) plenty of attention from well meaning people who are trying to help you deal with the incessant drama of AAA
13.) a topic of focus which allows one to deflect the life surrounding and awaiting much needed attention
14.) likely provides us with a subject who can serve as a scapegoat for release of pent up anger and blame
could probably go on and on but I turned in my card awhile back and have to get my butt to bed since I need sleep... and can actually get some now!
12.) plenty of attention from well meaning people who are trying to help you deal with the incessant drama of AAA
13.) a topic of focus which allows one to deflect the life surrounding and awaiting much needed attention
14.) likely provides us with a subject who can serve as a scapegoat for release of pent up anger and blame
could probably go on and on but I turned in my card awhile back and have to get my butt to bed since I need sleep... and can actually get some now!
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Join Date: Dec 2007
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Posts: 5,435
Leslie
Ooooooh those are some good benefits. I forgot about those! The ones you listed helped me think of a few more!
15) Allows us to focus on someone else so that we don't have to address our own character defects (after all THEY have a problem....not us)
16) It gives us the illusion of authority over everyone else's life.
17) Membership allows us to be fueled by our own ego.
18) It allows us to care more about what others think of us than we think of ourselves.
19) It allows us to carry an enormous weight of deep resentment.
Wow......so many benefits.....and I do believe I used them all! I don't know if I could be a member again. I don't think I have the emotional capital to pay the dues.
gentle hugs
ke
Ooooooh those are some good benefits. I forgot about those! The ones you listed helped me think of a few more!
15) Allows us to focus on someone else so that we don't have to address our own character defects (after all THEY have a problem....not us)
16) It gives us the illusion of authority over everyone else's life.
17) Membership allows us to be fueled by our own ego.
18) It allows us to care more about what others think of us than we think of ourselves.
19) It allows us to carry an enormous weight of deep resentment.
Wow......so many benefits.....and I do believe I used them all! I don't know if I could be a member again. I don't think I have the emotional capital to pay the dues.
gentle hugs
ke
Getting there!!
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Well, lol!
My AAA membership allowed my to blame everyone else. It was great because I didn't have to take ownership of any of my behaviors. He was the one that had the problem, it was his fault that I was unhappy, he made me act that way and of course, if he "changed" ....... all would be fine.
Problem with my membership is that when I really needed help because I was so lost, no one came to rescue me. I was stuck and was on my own feeling sick and tired.
I cancelled my membership. Sometimes, I still pick ia free weekend pass here and there but each time, I remember why I cancelled it. AAA can not provided me with the services I need. It really gave me a false sense of "security."
My AAA membership allowed my to blame everyone else. It was great because I didn't have to take ownership of any of my behaviors. He was the one that had the problem, it was his fault that I was unhappy, he made me act that way and of course, if he "changed" ....... all would be fine.
Problem with my membership is that when I really needed help because I was so lost, no one came to rescue me. I was stuck and was on my own feeling sick and tired.
I cancelled my membership. Sometimes, I still pick ia free weekend pass here and there but each time, I remember why I cancelled it. AAA can not provided me with the services I need. It really gave me a false sense of "security."
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
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Originally Posted by LoveMeNow
Well, lol!
My AAA membership allowed my to blame everyone else. It was great because I didn't have to take ownership of any of my behaviors. He was the one that had the problem, it was his fault that I was unhappy, he made me act that way and of course, if he "changed" ....... all would be fine.
Problem with my membership is that when I really needed help because I was so lost, no one came to rescue me. I was stuck and was on my own feeling sick and tired.
I cancelled my membership. Sometimes, I still pick ia free weekend pass here and there but each time, I remember why I cancelled it. AAA can not provided me with the services I need. It really gave me a false sense of "security."
My AAA membership allowed my to blame everyone else. It was great because I didn't have to take ownership of any of my behaviors. He was the one that had the problem, it was his fault that I was unhappy, he made me act that way and of course, if he "changed" ....... all would be fine.
Problem with my membership is that when I really needed help because I was so lost, no one came to rescue me. I was stuck and was on my own feeling sick and tired.
I cancelled my membership. Sometimes, I still pick ia free weekend pass here and there but each time, I remember why I cancelled it. AAA can not provided me with the services I need. It really gave me a false sense of "security."
Wow.....you really hit the nail on the head with that!!
Getting to that point of being totally broken down is when I finally realized that I needed to cancel my membership. I needed a tow truck BAD! I didn't realize that all I had to do is ask for help. My HP became my tow truck. I couldn't do it alone.
gentle hugs
ke
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Alabama
Posts: 1,741
20. It gave me the illusion I had more power than my HP (God) without me even realizing it.
21. Allowed me to continue the dysfunctional dance out of "love"
22. Allowed me to be feel neglected and/or unloved because I was not getting the type of love I thought I should be or deserved when I was not even loving our myself.
23. Allowed me to build resentments that were "other" peoples fault instead of my own.
24. Gave me many days of not eating, depression, restless nights and many tears,
I take a trial pass sometimes and remember why I don't want my membership ever again.
21. Allowed me to continue the dysfunctional dance out of "love"
22. Allowed me to be feel neglected and/or unloved because I was not getting the type of love I thought I should be or deserved when I was not even loving our myself.
23. Allowed me to build resentments that were "other" peoples fault instead of my own.
24. Gave me many days of not eating, depression, restless nights and many tears,
I take a trial pass sometimes and remember why I don't want my membership ever again.
Getting there!!
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Oh yes Kindeyes, I, too, needed God. Although, I had a strong faith - when I needed God the most, I turned away from him in anger for a brief time. It was even easier to blame God, All Mighty, then giving up my membership.
I found a whole new respect for Job. When the time came, I realized I could only talk the talk but not walk it.
I found a whole new respect for Job. When the time came, I realized I could only talk the talk but not walk it.
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Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 864
They should all be put together as some sort of reference. One club no one needs to be a card carrying member to, although I do still find that it is very hard for many to keep it about them. I get it, last thing I wanted to be was codie, and hell what was that, it all seemed to normal … sick home as a child surely didn’t help and I was raised, hell groomed to be not only a scapegoat, but the perfectionist, and the peacemaker, the loner. I can flip the mask on and off to a new one in seconds.
I thrived in chaos, and my heart rate never went up. I was more likely to have my heart racing on end and anxiety ridden in the peace, not in the chaos.
I will add a number 25. Taking the blame to a more self destructive level, and use. Oh is was so his fault <rolling eyes>
I find it all so fascinating, my own thinking and reactions, knowing better. Even picking back up I knew better, or at least should have. I do believe that I might have ended up exactly where I was suppose to. I am very grateful for the whole experience, I learned a lot about myself in taking the time and for those who don’t understand it yet, YOU DESERVE THE TIME YOU GIVE YOURSELF TO FIND YOURSELF … side doesn’t matter.
I am so glad I burned my membership card
I thrived in chaos, and my heart rate never went up. I was more likely to have my heart racing on end and anxiety ridden in the peace, not in the chaos.
I will add a number 25. Taking the blame to a more self destructive level, and use. Oh is was so his fault <rolling eyes>
I find it all so fascinating, my own thinking and reactions, knowing better. Even picking back up I knew better, or at least should have. I do believe that I might have ended up exactly where I was suppose to. I am very grateful for the whole experience, I learned a lot about myself in taking the time and for those who don’t understand it yet, YOU DESERVE THE TIME YOU GIVE YOURSELF TO FIND YOURSELF … side doesn’t matter.
I am so glad I burned my membership card
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