Taking Care of Ourselves
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Taking Care of Ourselves
Saturday, March 9, 2013
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
Taking Care of Ourselves
We cannot simultaneously set a boundary and take care of another person's feelings. It's impossible; the two acts contradict.
What a tremendous asset to have compassion for others! How difficult that same quality can make it to set boundaries!
It's good to care about other people and their feelings; it's essential to care about ourselves too. Sometimes, to take good care of ourselves, we need to make a choice.
Some of us live with a deeply ingrained message from our family, or from church, about never hurting other people's feelings. We can replace that message with a new one; one that says it's not okay to hurt ourselves. Sometimes, when we take care of ourselves, others will react with hurt feelings.
That's okay. We will learn, grow, and benefit by the experience; they will too. The most powerful and positive impact we can have on other people is accomplished by taking responsibility for ourselves, and allows others to be responsible for themselves.
Caring works. Caretaking doesnt. We can learn to walk the line between the two.
Today, I will set the limits I need to set. I will let go of my need to take care of other peoples feelings and instead take care of my own. I will give myself permission to take care of myself, knowing its the best thing I can do for others and myself.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
Taking Care of Ourselves
We cannot simultaneously set a boundary and take care of another person's feelings. It's impossible; the two acts contradict.
What a tremendous asset to have compassion for others! How difficult that same quality can make it to set boundaries!
It's good to care about other people and their feelings; it's essential to care about ourselves too. Sometimes, to take good care of ourselves, we need to make a choice.
Some of us live with a deeply ingrained message from our family, or from church, about never hurting other people's feelings. We can replace that message with a new one; one that says it's not okay to hurt ourselves. Sometimes, when we take care of ourselves, others will react with hurt feelings.
That's okay. We will learn, grow, and benefit by the experience; they will too. The most powerful and positive impact we can have on other people is accomplished by taking responsibility for ourselves, and allows others to be responsible for themselves.
Caring works. Caretaking doesnt. We can learn to walk the line between the two.
Today, I will set the limits I need to set. I will let go of my need to take care of other peoples feelings and instead take care of my own. I will give myself permission to take care of myself, knowing its the best thing I can do for others and myself.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,384
I ask my HP for help guiding me to let go and handing people back over to their HP. I take care of my needs, and allow others the dignity of taking care of their needs.
This is a good reminder as I have been getting a dose of FOG from my AM today. I care for my mother, but I will not be her caretaker. I allow her the dignity of taking responsibility for herself.
This is a good reminder as I have been getting a dose of FOG from my AM today. I care for my mother, but I will not be her caretaker. I allow her the dignity of taking responsibility for herself.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
We cannot simultaneously set a boundary and take care of another person's feelings. It's impossible; the two acts contradict.
Knowing is one thing, being able to live that knowledge is another. As long as we are trying, we are making progress. One day down the road it all becomes clear.
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