LoveMeNow

My beautiful, sweet daughter is almost 19 and wants to be out on her own.

I will be honest, I hate the choices she is making! I hate that she is not in college! I so want her home!!! IMO, 18 is a number and she still needs guidance, structure and accountability.

I do not believe she is doing drugs but she did tell me she drank a couple of times over the summer. I know alcohol is a drug but she says she felt stupid and didn't like it.

She called me last night and asked if I would meet her to talk! I listened, bit my tongue and told her I would support her choices. I did not bargain, bribe or try and manipulate her.

Today, she left me a message saying "Hi Mom, I just called to say I am fine, I love you so, so, so much and will be over tomorrow. Let's me, you and Dad go to lunch, my treat!!"

She seems to have found forgiveness in heart for her father (her boss is a RA and they have talked a lot) but is really harboring a lot of anger for her bio mom, which is something she never really wanted to talk about before. Her old therapist warned me that her memories would come back and she would be very angry. I guess that time is here!! I did tell her that if or when she wanted to go to counseling, I would help her with that and to always know she had a home, if she changed her mind!!

My heart feels a little sad. I pray she stays safe and makes good choices!! Letting go is so hard!! I am accepting it is her life, her journey and I can not control her!

suki44883

((((HUGS)))) It's hard to let them go, I know. I had such mixed emotions when my daughter moved out. I'm happy to say though, that she is doing very well, working part-time and taking classes at night. She's only asked for a loan one time in order to pay for classes and said she would pay me back when her FAFSA money came in. She did, so we're even now.

You're doing the right thing, mom. I know it's hard, but it sounds like you have a good relationship and you are keeping the lines of communication open. Hang in there. It may take a while, but you'll be fine.

Ilovemysonjj

LMN, I totally understand how you feel. Our children are so young and precious even if they are legally adults. My middle son is a senior this year and planning on leaving the nest for college (God willing!) in August of 2013. I treasure the time we have together. It will be hard for you, but your relationship with your daughter will always be treasured and as she sees how hard it is on her own, she will always know she can call Mom if you let her experience her freedom her way.
Hugs,
Teresa

LoveMeNow

I sent my daughter this song via itunes for her graduation. She sent it back to me today!! <3 My Wish by Rascal Flatts!!

My Wish - YouTube