What does "3 for hundo" mean?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: at the beach
Posts: 339
familydestroyed,
i completely understand the confusion and unwillingness to completely let go of his actions and behaviors. i, myself, still struggle w/ it at times. and it takes a while. it may take longer as we refuse to acknowledge the fact that there really is nothing that we can do b/c it feels like giving up on a person that we have known for so long.
i do agree with others as far as detachment goes. being detached from his addiction does not mean that you have to stop caring about him. for me, it just means that i don't get so wrapped up in what he is doing that it is a distraction from me doing what i need to do. especially because it is pointless; he is going to do what he is going to do regardless if you stand on your head, yell at him, plead w/ him, etc. or if you just go on about your business and not worry about him. both our husbands are grown people who are capable of making their own decisions.
i do agree w/ you that it is so painful to watch them ruin their lives or whatever is left of them. some people learn the hard way, including myself, but sometimes it is the most effective way to learn things.
i have been away from my AH for 6 months now and am just starting to see the benefits of detaching. and i'm still not doing it 100% b/c it is hard and like most of us b/c i "refuse" to at times. but it does get easier w/ time.
i just wanted to send you some encouragement and to let you know to hang in there. focusing on yourself instead of him is something we haven't done in years or ever and of course it is not going to happen overnight, but it is the healthiest thing to look for for yourself and your children.
stay strong and keep on moving forward, regardless of him following you or not (easier said than done). my hugs and prayers go out to you and your family.
i completely understand the confusion and unwillingness to completely let go of his actions and behaviors. i, myself, still struggle w/ it at times. and it takes a while. it may take longer as we refuse to acknowledge the fact that there really is nothing that we can do b/c it feels like giving up on a person that we have known for so long.
i do agree with others as far as detachment goes. being detached from his addiction does not mean that you have to stop caring about him. for me, it just means that i don't get so wrapped up in what he is doing that it is a distraction from me doing what i need to do. especially because it is pointless; he is going to do what he is going to do regardless if you stand on your head, yell at him, plead w/ him, etc. or if you just go on about your business and not worry about him. both our husbands are grown people who are capable of making their own decisions.
i do agree w/ you that it is so painful to watch them ruin their lives or whatever is left of them. some people learn the hard way, including myself, but sometimes it is the most effective way to learn things.
i have been away from my AH for 6 months now and am just starting to see the benefits of detaching. and i'm still not doing it 100% b/c it is hard and like most of us b/c i "refuse" to at times. but it does get easier w/ time.
i just wanted to send you some encouragement and to let you know to hang in there. focusing on yourself instead of him is something we haven't done in years or ever and of course it is not going to happen overnight, but it is the healthiest thing to look for for yourself and your children.
stay strong and keep on moving forward, regardless of him following you or not (easier said than done). my hugs and prayers go out to you and your family.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Crazy Land USA
Posts: 259
Originally Posted by cynical one 
In street language and drug talk the definition of "3 for hundo" means he is taking $100 worth of food, medicine, and clothing away from his child and wasting it on his narcissistic self. Nuff said.
You are absolutely right. Straight and to the point.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Chicago area
Posts: 4,269
Originally Posted by cynical one
In street language and drug talk the definition of "3 for hundo" means he is taking $100 worth of food, medicine, and clothing away from his child and wasting it on his narcissistic self. Nuff said.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
