What2do72

Hi there. I am new here. My girlfreind had a problem with pills a few years ago, which foolishly, her family, friends and I (her common-law husband) thought was long over. About a year ago 50 sleeping pills went missing from my mother's prescription while we were there for dinner. Later that night my Mom called and told me they were missing and that she thought my girlfriend was acting strange. When I asked her about it, with some coaxing, she came clean. Her friends and I thought we could get her through it with our help so nobody else (her parents and her daughter's father would know about it). Jump to about a month ago.....were we ever WRONG.

Again, my Mom calls and says my GF had called and sounded drunk....she doesn't drink. I went home, confronted her again....again she lied, but eventually came clean. We went to see a counsellor and they called to get her into a dry-out centre the next day. When she came clean with the counsellor, my jaw hit the floor. She had been using percoset, oxy, T3's, T4's...doctor shopping, and when she couldn't get to a doctor, she would swallow 20 or 30 over the counter sleeping pills everyday since she was 17. There must have been a few days she didn't. This time I wasn't going to stand by and watch her lose everything. She completed the nine days in the dry-out and was like a completely different person, so happy and full of life. She got out October 2. Last Sunday I found more sleeping pills at the bottom of her purse while getting a smoke. She said it crossed her mind but she didn't take any. There was 6 missing. Last night I found the empty box from those ones under her drivers seat while fixing something in her car, along with another empty bottle. None of these were there after she got out of recovery, as I had cleaned the car out for her. I don't know what to believe anymore if anything at all. I love this girl and her daughter. We are a family, but this is putting more and more of a wedge between us. I have also been diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis recently and haven't been doing what I need to do, because I am worrying about her, and my step-daughter.

Does anyone know of any good books for families and spouses of substance abusers? She is going to an NA meeting tonight and her mother is getting involved and being supportive now too. Just hope it's not too late. Thanks for reading my babble.

outtolunch

At one time or another most of us think we are powerful enough to compel somone else to get and stay clean. Reality is, none of us have any power over anyone else or their choices. She is not going to stay clean until she is ready and not a moment sooner. She owns her own recovery.

Sounds like she is an opiate/opiod addict.Does she drive with the child in the car? Does she spend time alone with this child? I cannot imagine this is good for the child. How does the bio dad feel about this?

I am so sorry to hear of your health problems. I would imagine the stress of this situation does not help.Consider Codependency No More by Melody Beattie. You can pick up a copy at your local library or used on Amazon. The book is about and for you, not the addict in your life.

Ann

Codependent No More would be my suggestion too. And also Language of Letting Go, also by Melody Beattie.

Those books helped me enormously, as did going to meetings.

Hope this helps.

Hugs