Originally Posted by endangered

Thanks everyone for listening and responding. He had a job interview today for a dream job. Hoping he gets it, loves it, and gets clean. Regardless of that I have chosen not to confront him with the knowledge I have of his pills. Obviously, if he wants to hide them and keep them a secret then it is a problem. Although I haven't completely thrown in the towel, I am 'planning' for the future. I will be seeing an attorney soon so that I can be sure I am doing what I need to do to protect myself and my family.

At this point I plan to do just what everyone says and go by his actions and behaviors. Unfortunately, I am afraid I know how that will go as he throws tantrums practically everyday, sometimes more than once a day. He uses every filthy curse word known to man, stalks about, makes everyone nervous and unhappy. This is usually set off by some small something that most folks wouldn't bother to get nearly so worked up about. When I first came here someone said "sober up a jerk and you still have a jerk". He isn't sober....but I've known him for 25 years and I'm afraid I will finally have to admit that he is a jerk.

I have always been for the underdog, the misunderstood, mistreated. Guess I thought I could make him happy and he wouldn't be so moody. Through the years, kids, trials, etc. he has just gotten worse (I'm sure the pills are to blame for some of it but regardless we just can't live like this anymore). I'm going to choose the best time I can and talk to him about his 'behavior' rather than his addiction. Lay it on the line and tell him that high or sober we can't live that way and see what happens. Sadly, when you know someone as well as I know him, you can usually foresee the outcome.

Anyway, I finally found a good book to lead me in working the steps. I knew the steps, just didn't have the instruction manual lol. Going to focus more on me and the kids and just work the program. Time will tell what he will do but for right now I just can't be very optimistic about it.