INLOVEWITHCH

Hey Ya'll, as many of you know, me and my CH had a GREAT weekend, and yesterday was great too... that is until he went to the grocery which is 10 minutes away to get ice cream and came back 40 minutes later... anyway being new to the drug scene, I really need some verbal advice.. is anyone willing to call me tonight or give me their number so I can call tonight? I can PM it or you can PM it to me...
Thanks...

Ann

Maybe you could share here and get more support. We don't encourage exchanging telephone numbers or any personal information unless you are very very sure of the person you are communicating with.

We have had trouble in the past and there is nothing we can do to protect anyone beyond these forums.

A phone number can be traced to an address and to an actual name, and that is often too much information to put out on the internet.

Just a caution and I hope you will share.

Hugs

parentrecovers

what's on your mind, inlovewith? you going to alanon or naranon meetings in your community? they share phone lists at those face to face meetings - i've met folks there who i call and call me. it's a lifesaver somedays, i understand, to have someone just to talk to. blessings, k

INLOVEWITHCH

Parent, I have tried and tried to find naranon meetings in the area.. I have only been able to contact N.A. and there was very nice gentleman who told me that I was more than welcome to go to one of their meetings to see "the other side", but I just really feel like I need a naranon meeting. (I fear I will just take one of those guys, shake them, and tell them to get with it.. lol). Anyway, I guess I just wanted to talk to someone because I have sooo many questions to ask. My CHBF and I have such wonderful times, but I cannot help but doubt him sometimes. We have spent the last 5 days practically joined at the hip and its been wonderful, but I know that he has been lying to me about some things, and his trip to the grocery raised a few questions because he was gone for 40 minutes and it should have only taken him 25 max and when be came back to the house he was regular and normal and then about 1.5 hours later he started acting so goofy. He was verifiably clean for 3 years, and relapsed once that I know of for sure (2 times I am not sure, but possible). Also I read that drugs bring out the sexual beast in some people, and I just have a few questions about that too. I am crazy about this guy and have been since the moment that I met him, but I am also trying to look out for myself. My CH BF is a crack addict, but I feel like if I hold that against him it would be like him holding my depression (which is under control but does resurface from time to time) against me.
Any words of advice or help would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks

parentrecovers

what about going to alanon meetings? there's typically more alanon meetings available and a lot of folks at my alanon meetings also deal with drug addiction issues with friends and family members.

it's very hard to trust again, i understand. so much fear.

is your husband willing to do some private counseling with the two of you? do you have insurance to cover that?

i have found it's really important for everyone to work on their own recovery.

i'm sorry you're struggling.

blessings, k

teke

sorry but if you don't mind me saying, in my opinion, it may be time for you completely take the focus off him and turn it inward, it may be a little hard to monitor his time all the time. he is an adult, he may end up not allowing you to do that and maybe its time for you to prepare yourself. addiction gets progressively worse.

i'm sorry that he didn't come home right away but my rah is a crack addict and his addiction had progressed to where he didn't come home for days, the longest time was for 17 days.

maybe its time for you to take a look at how you really want your life to be and work towards that goal. you really cant control his actions and if he decides to use and keep using, there is nothing you can do or say to stop him. you have to protect yourself by doing for you what you know you need to do for yourself, and allow him to do the same.

BigSis

My area has no Naranon, and the majority of us at Alanon are dealing with both addiction and alcoholism (which in my mind are the same condition).

Because the program focuses on US, not THEM, either program is excellent.

I wish you well.

caughtinthemid

My AS is a recovering heroin addict and finds the most benefit from AA or CA meetings, rather than NA or HA meetings. Perhaps you can find some alanon ( or what do you call cocaine anonymous meetings?!?!?) that you would relate to. Glad you found this board and happy you are reaching out. You will find help if you con't seeking it.