notsleepingwell

Either someone bailed her out or she was released!!! Been working my 4 (12 hour shifts) so been kinda busy. Called the jail and got the visiting hours, Every Tues and Thurs. Worked Monday night, and was gonna come home from work and go directly to the jail 1/2 hour away, before sleeping because I didn't want her to feel alone.

Thankfully, when I got home, I was soooo tired, I just went to bed. When I went back to work on Tues night, when turning my cell on....heard that little voice

"Hi Mom, can you come pick me up at the courthouse, if not I'll start walking"

And that's the last I heard. Course today I came home and directly to bed. She didn't sound mad at me then....but she hadn't been home yet to find that I hadn't gone round to tell the boyfriend.

OMG...how do we get sucked into the drama, I could kick myself. Talk about obsessing!!! Even my BIL who knows nothing about naranon told me....you have to start focusing on You!! Funny you know....I can talk the talk...but walkin the walk.....a leetle harder!!!

I was jjust sooooo looking forward to having her in jail for 6 mos!!! Kinda at my mercy!!! LOL. Was planning my visits where I would tell her what was what....cause right now, I kinda walk on eggshells around her, she controls what we talk about, cause she'll say...."I just don't want to talk about it" and I back off on whatever I was saying.

But I think I finally get IT!!!! I'm done!!!!! (Well at least till I hear from her again) LOL

I was just telling my BIL, you know, it's doubly hard, cause the little guy just lights up when she comes over, so if it were just me....I woulda backed out long ago, but he just soaks up her love while she's here, and he's been through so much, I hate to stop that.....but.....

Gotta rethink my game plan!!!
NSW

parentrecovers

so much chaos. i'm sorry you're going through so much. the game plan does change, i know that from experience. just do the best you can for yourself and the little one. i know you will. blessings, k

Done_With_It

Ughh, I'm so sorry. It's so hard with a little one in the picture. (((...)))

Hurtbad2505

I'm glad you posted, was looking for an update. It must be hard to detach when you have the grandson there, hell, it's hard to detach period...
There always seems to be something with addicts....even though AS is clean at the moment, I know it's a tight-rope walk every day...I've learned not to expect anything more than what is at the moment.

At least she was in there long enough to get over the 'sick', but since you didn't hear from her yet...you know what that likely means.

You take care of yourself and let us know how you're doing...

teke

oh i'm sorry, maybe she'll find her way and be ready soon, in the meantime, keep the focus on you and take care of lil guy, he's so blessed to have you for a grandma. still praying for all of you.

marle

Even though she is out for now, she still will face her consequences down the line. Maybe a court ordered rehab. There is still hope, even though I know you would have preferred that she sit in jail for the next 6 months. Just remember it is not your call. But you can still have a positive effect on your life and that of your grandson. Sending hugs and prayers, Marle

hope213

it is really hard to detact from our kids but that is what we have to do to keep out peace of mind. forus on you & lil guy, he is important. hugs & prayers, hope

itiswhatitis...

not,

i'm sorry - you finally get something figured out and everything goes and gets refigured - that sucks - i hope she saw some light while she was there...

my mom left here last tues. wanting to get my sister to get help - no o ne from my family had seen or talked to her in about a month - and she had left some weird messages on cell phones - well mom had other things to do but sister is at home and las t thursday had a lucid conversation with mom - she still hates me (how could i have done this?) but at least she was coherent and at her house - she even talked to her exhusband who has lil guys older brothers - she called him yesterday (mon) and made sense - she wanted to see kids but wanted to get things together for him (social security cards, insurance, etc.) - exbil called mom (she had told him she wanted to go see sister last tues.) and asked if she could pick that stuff up - mom said no - she was going out with her bf at 4 - ok - sister was actually lucid - her bf is in jail (punched a police officer supposedly) - and she was at her house - she had been for 4 days now and mom doesn't go talk to her? - i konw i'm not my mom (i haven't talked to her since she left last tues.) but i wish she would do what she says she would do - she's as unpredictable and selfish as the addicted sister - yeeccchhh - i guess you can't depend on anyone to do what they say they're going to do except yourself - tomorrow is a new day - i wonder if anyone will call?????

sorry, not, didn't mean to steal your thread - this addiction crap really messes with the best laid plans doesn't it?

we hope...

love,
s

nogard

Focus on you is good.

I remember all the chaos I caused it was just another day at the office or a break until I got some drugs, any drugs would do.

Kevin

bookmiser

((((NSW))))

Sorry the jail time was short and didn't stick.
Doesn't she have to go to court for sentencing, though?
Or did I miss something?
Whichever...just keep focusing on you and your grandson.
I'm sorry, sweetie. A little time in the clink may have done some good.
I know it did with my as.
Love ya,

greeteachday

My thougthts exactly...I'm so sorry NSW. I hope you have some time off work now and can rest and try to refocus on you and your little guy. Hugs and prayers

lostparent

Sorry things didn't work out like you had hoped, but like someone said seems like she'd still have to go to court at some point, so maybe they'll get her then. Your so right it is much harder to have no contact when they have a child. Good thing is he has you to love him an keep him safe.

Ann

Yup. Re-read your posts and see how often your life is a "reaction" to hers, how your feelings are a reaction to what she is doing or thinking, and how you feel a need to guess her next step so that YOU can be prepared.

It's not that I am wise, it's that I have been where you are, living my life as a reaction to my son's addiction.

Once I found recovery and began to choose healthy actions for myself, I learned that I could make choices that were healthy for me....no matter what my son did or what HIS "reaction" was to MY plans. What a change, my son reacting to my recovery?

It works, but first we need to break the habit of "reacting" and start choosing actions that are in our best interest.

My prayers go out for your daughter, I really hope she finds or is led to a better path.

Hugs

BigSis

Prayers going up NSW... ((((NSW))) ((((NSWDaughter)))) ((((LittleGuy))))