Just Confused
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: midland texas
Posts: 5
Just Confused
Hi I am new to this and really hoping to get to know others that can help me with understanding my a/boyfriend we have been together for 8 years now. He has been sober for over a year and things have been really good between us until lately. He is getting more and more closed off it seems, he tells me there is nothing wrong but he is so quite. I just worry. His self esteem seems to be very low right now. He is going to his AA meetings he said he doesn't want to drink. I don't want to over pressure him but I want to understand and be supportive. I just feel it inside that something is bothering him I don't know how to get him to open up.
Member
Join Date: May 2004
Location: over yonder
Posts: 1,548
Welcome to SR dstar..
My suggestion is to not try to talk to him right now, as many have trouble holding on to soberiety no matter even if they want it soo very much.
Sobriety is so very difficult, lets hope he has a good sponsor, they really need to work with other AA's when things get difficult.
Perhaps just let him be quiet, and be quiet with him. He may be holding on by a toenail if the craving is strong.
We go thru the pink cloud thing when we first find AA. Then it gets difficult for so many reasons. A whole new world and changeing most of our thinking is a full time job.
Others will be by to share. I am for now coming from my thoughts as a recoverying alcoholic.
This is the greatest site ever. Keep coming back.
Remember to take what you can use and leave the rest.
My suggestion is to not try to talk to him right now, as many have trouble holding on to soberiety no matter even if they want it soo very much.
Sobriety is so very difficult, lets hope he has a good sponsor, they really need to work with other AA's when things get difficult.
Perhaps just let him be quiet, and be quiet with him. He may be holding on by a toenail if the craving is strong.
We go thru the pink cloud thing when we first find AA. Then it gets difficult for so many reasons. A whole new world and changeing most of our thinking is a full time job.
Others will be by to share. I am for now coming from my thoughts as a recoverying alcoholic.
This is the greatest site ever. Keep coming back.
Remember to take what you can use and leave the rest.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Posts: 3,812
Hi and welcome to SR Dstar
Congrad to him for his year... that Im sure is hard to do.
Maybe ... Just maybe .... If he is "really" working his program then he has come to the point that he is coming out of the "fog" and is struggling with who he is. Most of his life he may have been making decisions while he was in a TOTALLY different frame of mind. Kinda like if you have cancer and know your going to die, you would live differently then if you did not know. There could be a million things that cause a change. Till he is ready to talk he probably wont.
Hon its his recovery and though its hard to do but you should probably just focus on yourself and let him deal with what he has to.
Congrad to him for his year... that Im sure is hard to do.
Maybe ... Just maybe .... If he is "really" working his program then he has come to the point that he is coming out of the "fog" and is struggling with who he is. Most of his life he may have been making decisions while he was in a TOTALLY different frame of mind. Kinda like if you have cancer and know your going to die, you would live differently then if you did not know. There could be a million things that cause a change. Till he is ready to talk he probably wont.
Hon its his recovery and though its hard to do but you should probably just focus on yourself and let him deal with what he has to.
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