When dreaming ends....
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 491
When dreaming ends....
So my ex's Mom calls me yesterday, tells me secretly my ex's having a graduation at her rehab. I asked her Mom if she was sure I should go, she highly encouraged it.
I went out, rented a car cause my bikes busted, bought a large number of her favorite flowers, sun flowers. Got there, she was suprised, but overall ok. I did feel a little left out, I also felt like her friends were looking at me funny probably because she tells them negative things about us after we broke up. In any case, the part that really got to me was when she stood to speak, she thanked her Mom so much, and even though I went through icy cold rain with my motorcycle to see her at rehab every single week until she was released, she never thanked me.
Later, I told her how I felt hurt. To me, that was the last time I was going to keep letting myself get hurt. Maybe some of you will think I over reacted, but after all our past and all I do and still do for her, she compares me with her addict friends she only met 3 months ago and said she was thanking everyone. I told her, I was not everyone.
We say its not working out, I end it by telling her, its not.
I give, she takes, she gives nothing back. I'm finding someone else.
In one sense, this makes it easy to leave an addict. As intellectually, I know its a life long pain not to mention family pain with kids and who knows what else. On the other hand, my heart aches cause I wouldve blindly given her all the love she could ask for even despite her disease.
This where the dream ends, the dream that she is an exception. It was sad because at the rehab, everyone who graduated, were not with thier significant other except me. I was the only one there.... who dated a rehab girl.
Moving on, am hurt, but destiny has guided. I am grateful to have a friend constantly call me when I was there, he is downstairs now waiting to have dinner. I'm moving on with my life....
Jessica, you were right, thanks for your pm's, I shouldn't have gone. =(
I went out, rented a car cause my bikes busted, bought a large number of her favorite flowers, sun flowers. Got there, she was suprised, but overall ok. I did feel a little left out, I also felt like her friends were looking at me funny probably because she tells them negative things about us after we broke up. In any case, the part that really got to me was when she stood to speak, she thanked her Mom so much, and even though I went through icy cold rain with my motorcycle to see her at rehab every single week until she was released, she never thanked me.
Later, I told her how I felt hurt. To me, that was the last time I was going to keep letting myself get hurt. Maybe some of you will think I over reacted, but after all our past and all I do and still do for her, she compares me with her addict friends she only met 3 months ago and said she was thanking everyone. I told her, I was not everyone.
We say its not working out, I end it by telling her, its not.
I give, she takes, she gives nothing back. I'm finding someone else.
In one sense, this makes it easy to leave an addict. As intellectually, I know its a life long pain not to mention family pain with kids and who knows what else. On the other hand, my heart aches cause I wouldve blindly given her all the love she could ask for even despite her disease.
This where the dream ends, the dream that she is an exception. It was sad because at the rehab, everyone who graduated, were not with thier significant other except me. I was the only one there.... who dated a rehab girl.
Moving on, am hurt, but destiny has guided. I am grateful to have a friend constantly call me when I was there, he is downstairs now waiting to have dinner. I'm moving on with my life....
Jessica, you were right, thanks for your pm's, I shouldn't have gone. =(
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 105
Codemaster,
remember the stats on former As. The way I see it, why do that to yourself. It is not worth the pain and hurt. I didnt get out til I was married for 20 years. Mine went sober the day I told him we were divorcing, I know he is drinking again, this is 2 years later. I stuck it out as long as I could. And mine was a cake walk compared to a lot of folks here.
Every one has a bottom and it sounds like you hit yours.
Good luck
Just my 2 cents.
remember the stats on former As. The way I see it, why do that to yourself. It is not worth the pain and hurt. I didnt get out til I was married for 20 years. Mine went sober the day I told him we were divorcing, I know he is drinking again, this is 2 years later. I stuck it out as long as I could. And mine was a cake walk compared to a lot of folks here.
Every one has a bottom and it sounds like you hit yours.
Good luck
Just my 2 cents.
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Join Date: Apr 2005
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Posts: 491
I just cant understand it.... you know whats strange, and I realize this more and more as I become saner without her.
When I broke up with her end of last year cause her abuse drove me nutz, I briefly dated this asian girl. During this time, my birthday came around, and normally I dont care about my bday, but that day, this girl who I barely knew came over dressed really pretty. Not only that, she bought me a gift, an expensive cologne, and then she said she wanted to take me out to dinner. I was really shocked by such a statement, and I'm kind of used to my ex not giving me anything, so I suggested we could go to a really cheap chinese restaurant so she wont have to spend much money.
She was like, WHAT? and insisted on some place nice, maybe not insanely expensive, but just nice. So I knew of a good French restaurant I used to take my ex to, and we went. She had me order wine, delicious food and even expensive deserts, easily costing over $100 adn she paid for it all....
I was touched by the amount of giving she was giving.
Not to mention, she had a crazy wild and fun sex drive.
Why did I leave such a "normal" person? Cause my ex admitted to being an alcoholic at this point and wanted to sober up. I had hope she would be AWESOME after she sobered up.
Little to know, it only gets worst post sobriety. And chances they can fall off the wagon exists for life, yada yada yada. Mentally, its easy for me to list out why its not good, not to mention the 13th step, ugh.... but like one document i read said, I'm actually HOSTAGE to alcoholics, the "stolkholm syndrome" (sp!?). Its true, and today I hit my bottom. your right...
After so much, I was valued so little in her heart to remember to thank me for all I've done, she cant even see it, I honestly dont know what she see's period. But its one of those things beyond understanding. I wasted $82 bucks on renting a nice car just to visit her graduation, $25 for sunflowers and vase, today, only to pay to get hurt... what a deal. I really need to stop the abuse.
I really grateful an old friend of mine came over right when I got home, he came not knowing anything going on, just some reason, he really wanted to hang out. A bit of a weird coincidence cause I really needed a friend and he was already waiting for me when I came home... almost as if destiny or life gave me a hand...
as a good friend, we shared everything and we talked for many hours, and it was great to be reassured. He talks of how awesome his relationship is, adn it moves me to think people can actually give back so much love, I cant wait to experience that someday and I look forward to being loved with as much or more then I give!!!
Its hard though, my heart is sadden, but like my friend says today, you made the mistake of thinking you were smarter then everyone else and you could fix it when you met her crashing already, dont make it again, you will only get more regrets in the years to come the deeper you go you wont forgive yourself.
When I broke up with her end of last year cause her abuse drove me nutz, I briefly dated this asian girl. During this time, my birthday came around, and normally I dont care about my bday, but that day, this girl who I barely knew came over dressed really pretty. Not only that, she bought me a gift, an expensive cologne, and then she said she wanted to take me out to dinner. I was really shocked by such a statement, and I'm kind of used to my ex not giving me anything, so I suggested we could go to a really cheap chinese restaurant so she wont have to spend much money.
She was like, WHAT? and insisted on some place nice, maybe not insanely expensive, but just nice. So I knew of a good French restaurant I used to take my ex to, and we went. She had me order wine, delicious food and even expensive deserts, easily costing over $100 adn she paid for it all....
I was touched by the amount of giving she was giving.
Not to mention, she had a crazy wild and fun sex drive.
Why did I leave such a "normal" person? Cause my ex admitted to being an alcoholic at this point and wanted to sober up. I had hope she would be AWESOME after she sobered up.
Little to know, it only gets worst post sobriety. And chances they can fall off the wagon exists for life, yada yada yada. Mentally, its easy for me to list out why its not good, not to mention the 13th step, ugh.... but like one document i read said, I'm actually HOSTAGE to alcoholics, the "stolkholm syndrome" (sp!?). Its true, and today I hit my bottom. your right...
After so much, I was valued so little in her heart to remember to thank me for all I've done, she cant even see it, I honestly dont know what she see's period. But its one of those things beyond understanding. I wasted $82 bucks on renting a nice car just to visit her graduation, $25 for sunflowers and vase, today, only to pay to get hurt... what a deal. I really need to stop the abuse.
I really grateful an old friend of mine came over right when I got home, he came not knowing anything going on, just some reason, he really wanted to hang out. A bit of a weird coincidence cause I really needed a friend and he was already waiting for me when I came home... almost as if destiny or life gave me a hand...
as a good friend, we shared everything and we talked for many hours, and it was great to be reassured. He talks of how awesome his relationship is, adn it moves me to think people can actually give back so much love, I cant wait to experience that someday and I look forward to being loved with as much or more then I give!!!
Its hard though, my heart is sadden, but like my friend says today, you made the mistake of thinking you were smarter then everyone else and you could fix it when you met her crashing already, dont make it again, you will only get more regrets in the years to come the deeper you go you wont forgive yourself.
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: England
Posts: 3,410
code, I think you needed to go to the graduation to let all the pennies drop. Think of the money you spent as a "codie tax" - you needed to spend it to be able to move on in your life. I reckon it was a pretty cheap deal, don't you?
You're doing great - the growth I have seen in your posts ahs been amazing. Keep along that path and you will have all the happiness you deserve. I am in a similar situation and I am taking all the time I need to heal before I get into another relationship. Fun is the order of the day round here.
Take care
Love
Minnie
xxx
You're doing great - the growth I have seen in your posts ahs been amazing. Keep along that path and you will have all the happiness you deserve. I am in a similar situation and I am taking all the time I need to heal before I get into another relationship. Fun is the order of the day round here.
Take care
Love
Minnie
xxx
To Life!
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
Code;
Sorry about all of your problems. But, glad to see you moving on with your life. And it looks as if you've come to an understanding about what it is you want. Hold on to that.
May I ask a question?
What is this?
"the "stolkholm syndrome" (sp!?). "
I've never heard of it before.
Shalom!
Sorry about all of your problems. But, glad to see you moving on with your life. And it looks as if you've come to an understanding about what it is you want. Hold on to that.
May I ask a question?
What is this?
"the "stolkholm syndrome" (sp!?). "
I've never heard of it before.
Shalom!
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Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Great Britain
Posts: 138
codiemaster,sorry to hear of problems. But glad to see you are moving on. It is time to have fun.
Be good to yourself and know you stuck it out as long as you could...hit your rock bottom and are headed up and out to a brighter future. Way to go. Your strength and wisdom are showing in your posts. Just my opinion.
Be good to yourself and know you stuck it out as long as you could...hit your rock bottom and are headed up and out to a brighter future. Way to go. Your strength and wisdom are showing in your posts. Just my opinion.
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Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Where the sun always shines!
Posts: 1,625
Originally Posted by CodeMaster
I really grateful an old friend of mine came over right when I got home, he came not knowing anything going on, just some reason, he really wanted to hang out. A bit of a weird coincidence cause I really needed a friend and he was already waiting for me when I came home... almost as if destiny or life gave me a hand
as a good friend, we shared everything and we talked for many hours, and it was great to be reassured. He talks of how awesome his relationship is, adn it moves me to think people can actually give back so much love, I cant wait to experience that someday and I look forward to being loved with as much or more then I give!!!...
as a good friend, we shared everything and we talked for many hours, and it was great to be reassured. He talks of how awesome his relationship is, adn it moves me to think people can actually give back so much love, I cant wait to experience that someday and I look forward to being loved with as much or more then I give!!!...
CodeMaster - I can only imagine how horrible it must have felt for you. But now you have a better understanding that you have to do what is best for you.
I have felt so neglected at times by my AH. I have helped him MORE than anyone in his entire life. Only for him to turn around and stomp all over it. Now I know that the more I helped him, the more that help was allowing him to stomp.
Because of his low self-esteem, he would acknowledge help from others (I would say he was sucking up) but he would not acknowledge help from me (because he new I'd still help him).
I don't know if that made sense, but anyway......
I am sorry you are hurting, and I wish you all the best in this new path you will be taking.
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: northeast
Posts: 43
Codemaster--Iam sorry, but as others have said on this forum, just imagine if we had gone down the road of marrying these people, had children, with them, etc, etc. Last weekend was my breaking point, and I walked out. But for me that was the end--I can say with a clear mind that I gave it my all, and he just couldn't step up to the plate. It takes two to make a relationship and it sounds like you and me were in one ourselves most of the time.
Each day gets a little better, but there are moments. Like my 7 year old daughter's book project---each child wrote about a trip and the story was actually printed and bound. So I see it today--dedicated to -----my ex ABF!!! And the story was about visiting him. Somehow I don't want to stick it in her memory box that we save for special projects from school, but ??? She just thinks we broke up--has no idea about his A.
But life goes on...and hopefully I have gotten a little wiser from this relationship. I will trust my intuition more, but I still think I would have followed my heart as I did.
All my friends say I should go out now and meet a man, but right now I need to heal--my trust is kinda shot right now and my heart feels like it has been ripped from my body and stomped on!!This weekend will be hard--this is the weekend we would have seen each other, but I just have to think of the cruel things he said to me, all the times he hung up on me, or didn't answer.
The bottom line Code master---WE DESERVE BETTER!!!!!!
Each day gets a little better, but there are moments. Like my 7 year old daughter's book project---each child wrote about a trip and the story was actually printed and bound. So I see it today--dedicated to -----my ex ABF!!! And the story was about visiting him. Somehow I don't want to stick it in her memory box that we save for special projects from school, but ??? She just thinks we broke up--has no idea about his A.
But life goes on...and hopefully I have gotten a little wiser from this relationship. I will trust my intuition more, but I still think I would have followed my heart as I did.
All my friends say I should go out now and meet a man, but right now I need to heal--my trust is kinda shot right now and my heart feels like it has been ripped from my body and stomped on!!This weekend will be hard--this is the weekend we would have seen each other, but I just have to think of the cruel things he said to me, all the times he hung up on me, or didn't answer.
The bottom line Code master---WE DESERVE BETTER!!!!!!
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Join Date: Apr 2005
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I forgot to add
Go out and treat yourself!! Indulge...I am always on a diet and exercising---this week, I am eating sweets and fast food and not being a slave to the treadmill. Within reason of course. This weekend, when I should have been with my ex, I am going out shopping and buying some things for myself that I always thought I didn't need. Now that I don't have to drive and see him, think of the money I will save in gas. Of course I have my sad moments, esp in bed at night by myself, but they say time is a great healer....
This weekend, when I should have been with my ex, I am going out shopping and buying some things for myself that I always thought I didn't need. Now that I don't have to drive and see him, think of the money I will save in gas. Of course I have my sad moments, esp in bed at night by myself, but they say time is a great healer....
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Originally Posted by historyteach
Code;
Sorry about all of your problems. But, glad to see you moving on with your life. And it looks as if you've come to an understanding about what it is you want. Hold on to that.
May I ask a question?
What is this?
"the "stolkholm syndrome" (sp!?). "
I've never heard of it before.
Shalom!
Sorry about all of your problems. But, glad to see you moving on with your life. And it looks as if you've come to an understanding about what it is you want. Hold on to that.
May I ask a question?
What is this?
"the "stolkholm syndrome" (sp!?). "
I've never heard of it before.
Shalom!
http://www.empoweredrecovery.com/index.htm
Click on "Why people stay in abusive alcoholic relationships", my ex may have recently stopped drinking, but her true self is worst then her drinking times.
There is a section which helped me a lot , link is called Should I stay or go? Or something like that... It has a really helpful exercise where you list out with all honesty between YOU and that sheet of paper, list out what you have to bring to the table and what you take away.
Then list out the same for the A, then answer a few questions.
When I did it, I learned a lot, the decision was obvious and sadly to say when I listed her negative attributes from poor character to genetics to 13th steps and others, the list was so long it went to the back of the page and I was trying to be honest the whole time so its not like I was just trying to say bad things, I could not believe how many were coming to my head and how long it was compared to what she had to offer, or even compared to my list of bad, there was no comparison.
It asks you what do you see happening 10 years from now if she doesnt fully recovery (recovery more then just not drinking but from dry drunk or abusive), and the thought was scary. They also ask if ex does not fully recovery, what do you imagine your kids going through? Why are you still in this relationship? If A does not recover and you end up leaving relationship in 10 years, what do you picture happening to your life? Finally, what would your life and children be like if you completly left? I could not summarize it more but with the word "normal". When your on your deathbed looking back (for me, looking back 2 years), will you had wished you made a different decision?
Now I know everyones case is different, for me, the right thing is all so too obvious, it is just not easy to do the right decision.
I hope that site be helpful for others in similar shoes.
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Thanks for the kind and meaningful words everyone, I am thankful I have mostly detached from her so it helps for post event like now.
After I did my list of what I had to offer / take away and same for her, then after my friend came over and we had a great talk and walked through the new home I was purchasing, we both looked at each other and just thought it is unfortunate for my EX to lose everything by being the way she is.
It is unfortunate, but its unfortunate for her, the only thing she really brought to the table now is her beauty, but I can find even more beautiful anywhere else. Her innerself is the ugliest person I know of right now.
It is unfortunate, but unfortunate for her, it is all too clear to me this realization.
Its time to recovery, enjoy life. I plan to close on purchasing my new home early next week, I will rest with my friend who is moving in temporarily as he finds a job. We will together go to L.A. to meet a model friend of mine and she will introduce us to all her other model friends. My agent plans to help me purchase some really good designer furniture, she is talented in this stuff, and she even knows of a few girls who she said were asking if I was single she may introduce me to! I look forward to the future...
All this drama and for wha??? I've been so stupid.
After I did my list of what I had to offer / take away and same for her, then after my friend came over and we had a great talk and walked through the new home I was purchasing, we both looked at each other and just thought it is unfortunate for my EX to lose everything by being the way she is.
It is unfortunate, but its unfortunate for her, the only thing she really brought to the table now is her beauty, but I can find even more beautiful anywhere else. Her innerself is the ugliest person I know of right now.
It is unfortunate, but unfortunate for her, it is all too clear to me this realization.
Its time to recovery, enjoy life. I plan to close on purchasing my new home early next week, I will rest with my friend who is moving in temporarily as he finds a job. We will together go to L.A. to meet a model friend of mine and she will introduce us to all her other model friends. My agent plans to help me purchase some really good designer furniture, she is talented in this stuff, and she even knows of a few girls who she said were asking if I was single she may introduce me to! I look forward to the future...
All this drama and for wha??? I've been so stupid.
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: over yonder
Posts: 1,548
CodeMaster ..Hi....
Do you think it wise to start dateing?? Will it be fair to you or her??
I soo fear you will find another addict. That is what we do, if we do not take time to heal befor starting another relationship. Sorry! I just had to say that.
Maybe find a hobby, Go with friends, but maybe no relationships.
We hear about "on the rebound", most often both are on the rebound????
Just something to consider. How about courses on being a counselor?? Go to the library, Barrow a friends dog for walks in the park, take a book and go to watch people fish. Hope you don't mind my thoughts on this. Best Always clancy46
Do you think it wise to start dateing?? Will it be fair to you or her??
I soo fear you will find another addict. That is what we do, if we do not take time to heal befor starting another relationship. Sorry! I just had to say that.
Maybe find a hobby, Go with friends, but maybe no relationships.
We hear about "on the rebound", most often both are on the rebound????
Just something to consider. How about courses on being a counselor?? Go to the library, Barrow a friends dog for walks in the park, take a book and go to watch people fish. Hope you don't mind my thoughts on this. Best Always clancy46
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Join Date: Apr 2005
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Thank you for your thoughts... I still feel a need for advice, it hasnt been easy.
I've been focusing on myself, going to book store to read, handling my finances again, dealing with my bike, which by the way has become a blessing instead of a misfortune due to fact his insurance is going to pay to make my bike practically new! dealing with closing my home, hanging with friends, working out, Ive been doing a lot for myself and to enjoy myself. I'm not really lacking in hobbies or ideas to take up time.
But I am having a hard time seeing how much in need I really am where I need to heal myself. I'm already feeling good and strong, I figured I probably dont need al-anon anymore... and I kinda of want to leave all this addict stuff behind even though I know I was affected by it. I just want to make it my past and going to al-anon just makes me ponder my ex more and it sucks.
I was thinking of asking this girl out I see every once in a while who is nice to me that I've alwayed felt attracted to... figured we could just have dinner and go really slow?
Dunno... else, I can just sleep round until I've been healed or something...?
I've been focusing on myself, going to book store to read, handling my finances again, dealing with my bike, which by the way has become a blessing instead of a misfortune due to fact his insurance is going to pay to make my bike practically new! dealing with closing my home, hanging with friends, working out, Ive been doing a lot for myself and to enjoy myself. I'm not really lacking in hobbies or ideas to take up time.
But I am having a hard time seeing how much in need I really am where I need to heal myself. I'm already feeling good and strong, I figured I probably dont need al-anon anymore... and I kinda of want to leave all this addict stuff behind even though I know I was affected by it. I just want to make it my past and going to al-anon just makes me ponder my ex more and it sucks.
I was thinking of asking this girl out I see every once in a while who is nice to me that I've alwayed felt attracted to... figured we could just have dinner and go really slow?
Dunno... else, I can just sleep round until I've been healed or something...?
Caring for the 3 little bears
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Oz
Posts: 509
I know many people in Alanon, who just like the addicts, stop going, don't think they need it and within a year their lives are unmanageable again. Just something to think about. There are obviously some codependency traits, an alanon is a good way to help work on those. Just some food for thought.
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 491
Fine.
I'll drop by AlAnon to heal myself then, become a better stronger person, to give love to its fullest to the next special one, and so I maybe able to learn how to find a special one (unlike my ex).
I'm not going to learn how to be with an addict. With that, maybe I can deal without obsessing over the past.
See how it goes...
I'll drop by AlAnon to heal myself then, become a better stronger person, to give love to its fullest to the next special one, and so I maybe able to learn how to find a special one (unlike my ex).
I'm not going to learn how to be with an addict. With that, maybe I can deal without obsessing over the past.
See how it goes...
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Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Where the sun always shines!
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Originally Posted by CodeMaster
Fine.
I'll drop by AlAnon to heal myself then, become a better stronger person, to give love to its fullest to the next special one, and so I maybe able to learn how to find a special one (unlike my ex).
I'm not going to learn how to be with an addict. With that, maybe I can deal without obsessing over the past.
See how it goes...
I'll drop by AlAnon to heal myself then, become a better stronger person, to give love to its fullest to the next special one, and so I maybe able to learn how to find a special one (unlike my ex).
I'm not going to learn how to be with an addict. With that, maybe I can deal without obsessing over the past.
See how it goes...
Al-Anon gave me the tools I needed to live my life emotionally sane, with or without an alcoholic. I use some of the Al-Anon tools with simple house work and in dealing with my kids. The tools really help me.
Give it try. What have you got to loose. But remember this....nothing happens over night.
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Chicago, IL
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Codemaster
I checked out the link you sent and I found it really informative as well as interesting. After ending a 2 year relationship with my A fiancee I thought I could just move on and put this whole mess behind me as well. In retrospect I must consider why I would have been involved with such a person to begin with. Therefore, I must continue the healing process (even though I think I am beyond it) in order to avoid future encounters or worse a relapse with the old A financee. Just something you may consider.....hope you are enjoying the weekend so far....
Love, Patty
I checked out the link you sent and I found it really informative as well as interesting. After ending a 2 year relationship with my A fiancee I thought I could just move on and put this whole mess behind me as well. In retrospect I must consider why I would have been involved with such a person to begin with. Therefore, I must continue the healing process (even though I think I am beyond it) in order to avoid future encounters or worse a relapse with the old A financee. Just something you may consider.....hope you are enjoying the weekend so far....
Love, Patty
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Thread Starter
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Posts: 491
I'm glad the link was useful, it has a wealth of info!
I still have dreams and wake up spinning in my head about this girl, but thats only because it was all too recent when I was last hurt by her again. Time shall heal, and todays a warm nice day, going to do a lot today! Its the weekend I get to finally pack for real moving to the new place! I sign on Monday to close everything, funding is complete Tuesday, I cant wait to finally have a home I get to relax in and call home again! For two months, I've been selling my current home to buy that one and its been stressful because my current home is staged so I cant touch anything and cant really live in it cause everything is so modeled! LOL I cant wait to take a bath and just lay back and feel accomplished in the new home, new life, new start!
So weekend looks optimistic, will probably go out with friends today after all my errands done, working out, etc...
I hope everyones enjoying their weekend so far too, and I may try to find an Al-Anon as soon as today, or/and visit Borders to check out "getting them sober" as I heard its helpful for people like me, not meant to "get your SO back" type of thing, which I dont care for anymore, just care for healing.
Thanks for the helpful guidances.
I still have dreams and wake up spinning in my head about this girl, but thats only because it was all too recent when I was last hurt by her again. Time shall heal, and todays a warm nice day, going to do a lot today! Its the weekend I get to finally pack for real moving to the new place! I sign on Monday to close everything, funding is complete Tuesday, I cant wait to finally have a home I get to relax in and call home again! For two months, I've been selling my current home to buy that one and its been stressful because my current home is staged so I cant touch anything and cant really live in it cause everything is so modeled! LOL I cant wait to take a bath and just lay back and feel accomplished in the new home, new life, new start!
So weekend looks optimistic, will probably go out with friends today after all my errands done, working out, etc...
I hope everyones enjoying their weekend so far too, and I may try to find an Al-Anon as soon as today, or/and visit Borders to check out "getting them sober" as I heard its helpful for people like me, not meant to "get your SO back" type of thing, which I dont care for anymore, just care for healing.
Thanks for the helpful guidances.
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