SunDance

Hello All! I have a question that I need all of your help with. I have been going to meetings for two months and I have heard many people talk about working the steps and even starting over at step one having completed all of the steps in the past with a sponsor.

To all of you who are working or have worked the steps, how did you start? Do I need to get a sponsor to do so?

I have been reading Alanon Works and other Alanon literature besides reading/posting here and going to meetings but I feel like I am lost and I want to really dive into MY recovery.

I am grateful for any input you can give me.

Thanks,

SunDance

JT

Sundance,

Yes, a sponsor will help. Is there someone you have met that stands out as an example to you? Talk to that person after a meeting or give them a call and tell her just what you said above.

Journaling for me was huge...reading all you can find about the step you are working and writing out how it applies or what you see between the lines. Practice behaviors that apply to a particular step being sure to keep it simple.

As silly as it sounds today the first thing I gave up control of was telling my family what to wear. But it was hard! They refused to believe I meant it!!

Hugs,
JT

Dee at Mt Bully

What she said--you will need a sponser--and you just ask someone you feel comfortable with or maybe you have something in common besides alanon. Don't feel hurt if you have to ask more than one person. You will find some people are already
sponsering people or they are not far enough along with their own recovery etc.
Don't give up other members will help you find a sponsor and then you will be ready
to start the steps. In the mean time keep reading and writing. Smiles and lots of
encouragement--Dee

escape artist

you can start the steps on your own until you find a sponsor. just read the first step and keep reading it until you really believe it and accept it. then go to the next step. you can take as much time with each step as you are ready, but i would say be prepared when you finally LET GO! and give it to your higher power, because then things will start happening!

i love that one quote someone here has about instead of telling God about how big your storm is tell the storm how big your God is! (i started doing that! in fact there was an incident that really brought that home which i was able to share with my AH and you should have seen how big his eyes got, i think he got a little nervous about how big my God is!) anyway, read all you can and keep going to meetings even if you haven't found a sponsor. the steps are in the back of the little books they have.

JessicaNAJ

Thanks EA!! I needed to hear that one. I haven't heard it before.

nocellphone

I was in recovery for years before I made a commitment to myself to work the Steps with a sponsor. When I finally did, I really started to blossom.

I went to meetings and listened for someone who'd worked the Steps with a sponsor who'd worked the Steps with a sponsor (and so on...), who'd been where I'd been (to an extent) and who could show me, through their experience, how to recover. The sponsor I chose, no matter what the meeting topic, always seemed able to relate it to a particular Step or Steps. We've been working together since 1998, and I've learned sooooooooooooooo much more that just how to work the Steps.

I've learned how to live a healthy life.

SunDance

Thank you all! I guess my biggest problem (Codie here) is asking someone for that much of their time and support. Yes, I know, it is ok to ask. I may have one person that I will consider asking, until then, I will start reading the first step and working on that. The idea of journaling is also good, thank you!!

Gracey

For me I have had to start step one over so many times............for a very long time, I thought I had step one mastered......I thought I knew I couldnt control, or change anyone but myself.

But after working my recovery eight months later......I find myself back at step one alot...........alot of things I thought I was doing for myself for my recovery..........I later realized it was still a form of me trying to control things and other people. I have a feeling I am going to be in recovery for the rest of my life, just like an A. I have decided that I am worth putting alot of time in myself for my recovery.......I am the only one that can make me happier, and healthier.......I am starting to like myself........enough to know that it is okay, to make mistakes and fall backwards..........as long as I recognize this and learn by it........

I am not going to make everyone else happy, no matter how hard I try.........So I am going to try really hard to make me happy