Finding Love Again
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Join Date: Jan 2023
Posts: 2
Finding Love Again
Would love to hear some positive stories of finding love after heartbreak.
Before I met my XABF I had been in a 10 year relationship with an abuser. When I met my X a long time after recovering from this breakup, I thought I had finally found the one. 2 years later and its all fallen apart for me again.
I'm 29 years old and starting to panic about my future which I know is probably ridiculous but the unknown is eating me up inside.
Before I met my XABF I had been in a 10 year relationship with an abuser. When I met my X a long time after recovering from this breakup, I thought I had finally found the one. 2 years later and its all fallen apart for me again.
I'm 29 years old and starting to panic about my future which I know is probably ridiculous but the unknown is eating me up inside.
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Join Date: Aug 2022
Posts: 36
Unfortunately I don’t really have any personal story to share with you. But I will tell you heartbreak is such an all-consuming thing it feels impossible you’ll overcome it or find love again—or love that doesn’t come with a dark side of abuse or a seedy underbelly of toxicity.
It’s going to sound canned and cheesy. But focus less on future loves after heartbreak and more on loving yourself. You are your most important partner and the only person who will never leave. And there’s truth to not being able to love until you can love yourself—equally to us accepting the love we think we deserve. Please just be kind and loving to yourself and worry about love as a secondary thing for a while.
You’re also still SO YOUNG. I look back on being 29 and wish I’d realized then that that age is not “older” or “middle-aged” or anything of the sort. Even if you were older, the clock only ticks as you hear it. Time is a human construct and feeling enslaved to a number attached to age will not serve you in any positive way—my dad says to love each day and stay in the present. In a lot of contexts, I agree with him.
Sending lots of love, hugs, and good vibes. Hang in there. All my hopes that your heart will heal quickly. You’ll come out stronger, I promise. ❤️
It’s going to sound canned and cheesy. But focus less on future loves after heartbreak and more on loving yourself. You are your most important partner and the only person who will never leave. And there’s truth to not being able to love until you can love yourself—equally to us accepting the love we think we deserve. Please just be kind and loving to yourself and worry about love as a secondary thing for a while.
You’re also still SO YOUNG. I look back on being 29 and wish I’d realized then that that age is not “older” or “middle-aged” or anything of the sort. Even if you were older, the clock only ticks as you hear it. Time is a human construct and feeling enslaved to a number attached to age will not serve you in any positive way—my dad says to love each day and stay in the present. In a lot of contexts, I agree with him.
Sending lots of love, hugs, and good vibes. Hang in there. All my hopes that your heart will heal quickly. You’ll come out stronger, I promise. ❤️
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Join Date: Jun 2019
Posts: 316
You will continue to attract the same type of people, different person different relationship but ultimately the same story/feeling until you have healed what made you choose that kind of person in the first place. Many of us are programmed from a young age to feel comfortable in discomfort. It's not a conscious thing. You need to work on yourself and heal that wound before you can " find love again ", especially if you want it to be genuine reciprocal love. Because sadly they will all end the same if you don't. You being unhappy wondering how you repeated it again.
I did the "becoming the one program" by Shealina Ayaina. It helps you learn about yourself and your childhood wounds and the relationship patterns you have because of it and helps you learn how to love yourself and be comfortable with yourself before finding the right person.
her Instagram posts are extremely insightful.
createthelove Instagram account by Mark Groves is also amazing and helps you reprogram your normal.
I am only now in my first loving, reciprocal, healthy relationship with a man who also is/has done the self work and I am 37, divorced with three kids.
you are still so young, you have at least 10 childbearing years left, do the work on yourself so you can find a happy, healthy relationship instead of jumping in because you find someone who gives you that good feeling initially. It will wear off and you will be left hurt and with someone who cannot love you the way you deserve to be loved.
I did the "becoming the one program" by Shealina Ayaina. It helps you learn about yourself and your childhood wounds and the relationship patterns you have because of it and helps you learn how to love yourself and be comfortable with yourself before finding the right person.
her Instagram posts are extremely insightful.
createthelove Instagram account by Mark Groves is also amazing and helps you reprogram your normal.
I am only now in my first loving, reciprocal, healthy relationship with a man who also is/has done the self work and I am 37, divorced with three kids.
you are still so young, you have at least 10 childbearing years left, do the work on yourself so you can find a happy, healthy relationship instead of jumping in because you find someone who gives you that good feeling initially. It will wear off and you will be left hurt and with someone who cannot love you the way you deserve to be loved.
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