Newlife2019

That sounds very scary, especially since you think he's not actively drinking. (Sounds to me like he might be, though...) Good for you for dealing with this proactively, rather than simply living in fear. You are responsible not only for yourself, but for your young children as well. Keeping that in mind will help you overcome any hesitancy or embarrassment in seeking help. And, obviously, you have nothing to be embarrassed about. You and your children are victims of someone else's bad decisions and aberrant behavior. It's all on him, not you.