dandylion

alwayscovering…..I am, actually, in favor of "benign bribery" of teens, in certain situations....(wink)…..

For example, you m ight "bribe" him into going along to alateen, as you attend alanon….you could make it an evening out for the two of you....perhaps, going out for pizza or ice cream, after...and/or taking in a movie of his choice, together....or even getting him a new piece of electronics, or a new bike or a special day trip of his choice, after a period of time.....

Mango212

Very good point. ^^^

As for bribery, I used to. I no longer manipulate. I simply say straight up when kid has a choice and I listen and let his gut instinct have the say in it. Then if I really have a guiding force moment of him needing to be somewhere like alateen or a yoga class, I simply put my foot down. We do fun things on the way and afterwards, they just aren't a bribery. They're a part of life.

dandylion

Mango....lol....same thing. I know the word "bribery" has the sound of manipulation in it...that is why my term "benign" bribery.....reward or secondary gain is reward.....