Ladybird579

I forwarded her the thread the same day I was choking and sobbing she said this forum will keep me stuck pining over him.

I didn't know we were allowed to "forward threads" from here to others who don;t participate here. That has shocked me tbh.

Seren

Forgive the OT post:

This is an open, searchable forum on the internet. If you want to know more about that, you can read here:

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ure-forum.html (Privacy...and the open nature of this forum)

More specifically, you might want to explore the "LinkBack" and "Thread Tools" links at the top of this page.

hearthealth

Hobbies have a place in people's lives. SR and support groups can have a place in people's lives too. I will not make a quilt with support groups but I can learn other skills that are necessary in life.

Shredder22

Hi,
How are you? She asked me to think way back even to my childhood days of ten hobbies or less. I used to always say my hobbies are work, and people pleasing. I had no hobbies. So I made that list am I doing all of them that's very extreme. I will start throwing darts and see what sticks. I will go to celebrate recovery, and I like to structure my days, journal, mood tracker. I'm saving my money and get my past due debts in order. It was 11 months I can get over it and come out a better me. It's not easy but nothing ever is in life. When you work hard for your happiness, sanity, self care, and financial freedom I'm sure at some point I will feel so proud of me

velma929

Shredder, the therapist's advice to focus on yourself is the same many here would have given you. As always, it's 'take what you want and leave the rest.'

I loved my husband very much. I loved him, even when I decided to leave him. As luck would have it, the same day I decided to make plans to leave, he told me he was terminally ill. He died a few weeks later.

I didn't have the guts you did, to call it quits so early in the game. I really, *really* didn't want to admit my mistake in marrying an alcoholic. (It was a whirlwind romance) I loved him. Even now, in a way, I still do.

People think by the time you end a relationship, you *must* hate your partner. I suppose in some cases, that's true. It isn't always true, and hating people takes a lot of energy.

hearthealth

There are times I had to step away from SR because it became too overwhelming. I needed to focus on me without outside viewpoints. At other times I needed to establish human contact to get a frame of reference that I couldn't do for myself at the time. Everything in life is a balancing act to get you to a point of your greatest joy in the healthiest manner possible. All healthy options are good options.

Glenjo99

I had never thought of it like that before, forums could be another source of looking for external validation as well as for support, I suppose it's your intention dictates that. Everything in moderation I suppose. I have found great support in here and at times it's all so overwhelming.

Shredder22

Happy Birthday Virgo. I agree being on this can be addictive and I'm not handling my to do list. Looking for external validation I'm sure I do on here as I'm a code. So, I'm going to try to get my life back and post may be 3 or 4 times a week. I have your back Glenjo! Chin up. You will survive and thrive. Sometimes we need a breakdown for a breakthrough. I'm here with you with hands down the worst summer in my 34 years on planet earth. I can't fall off for these next season's. I was down all June and July came out to al anon, therapy, and sometimes went out teeth not brushed or shower in winter pajamas and house slippers. I thought I was going to die. I'm now showering daily, putting pretty outfits on, working for my boss. He gave me a get out of jail pass I took those 2 months off as he knows when I'm on my game I make him money when I'm low I'm useless to myself or him. He is in my gratitude journal.
Blessings

Glenjo99

[QUOTE=Shredder22;7002207]Happy Birthday Virgo. I agree being on this can be addictive and I'm not handling my to do list. Looking for external validation I'm sure I do on here as I'm a code. So, I'm going to try to get my life back and post may be 3 or 4 times a week. I have your back Glenjo! Chin up. You will survive and thrive. Sometimes we need a breakdown for a breakthrough. I'm here with you with hands down the worst summer in my 34 years on planet earth. I can't fall off for these next season's. I was down all June and July came out to al anon, therapy, and sometimes went out teeth not brushed or shower in winter pajamas and house slippers. I thought I was going to die. I'm now showering daily, putting pretty outfits on, working for my boss. He gave me a get out of jail pass I took those 2 months off as he knows when I'm on my game I make him money when I'm low I'm useless to myself or him. He is in my gratitude journal.
Blessings[/QUOT

Thanks shredder, I won't lie I'm pretty miserable but I'll keep on keeping on. Starting again today. Never want to experience a summer like that again I just hope it doesn't spread into the other seasons too to that degree. I'm with you on the posting less thing, I'll try everything in moderation!

Great your making progress at moment with work and looking after yourself.

Ladybird579

Eekk. I had no idea Think I'll be quiet from now on. People can tweet what we say too.