tew752018

My husband is being released from his 2nd stint in rehab this week. I am feeling very positive about his recovery and my own. I have been reluctant to attend al-anon and have only done online meetings. I'm considering attending in person meetings but having a problem with finding one. yes, there are several in my area. However, my mother in law attends almost every single one. I am not kidding, she goes every day, sometimes multiple times a day. I am NOT interested in attending a meeting with her. She is a very negative person, always has been, and i have recently distanced myself from her for my own sanity. She was being very pushy about me attending meetings and even sent my young daughter home with a bag full of pamphlets for me. (I'm quite capable of locating resources on my own.) So, how do I subtly ask which meetings she does NOT go to so I will have one to go to? To be honest, her obsession with it is quite a turn off for me, I'm not interested in gaining my own addiction, just the support of like-minded people.

Grassalley17

tew752018 - glad to hear you and your husband are both doing well with your recovery. I've personally found Al Anon extremely helpful. Do you think you can ask your MI to not attend a meeting so you can go to that one. Or, is there one in an adjacent town that she doesn't go to? If she won't agree to not go or you don't feel comfortable asking her, you may still wan to go. It's nice to hear others stories, you don't have to share at first or at all if you don't want to.

Mango212

Hi tew,

Welcome to SR.

I've had to drive very far to get to meetings. Having time alone in the car with upbeat music, Al-anon speaker cds and just my High Power and me wound up being a big part of my recovery.

The drives were also when my HP helped me really open up to anger and frustrations.

Family can drive me crazy. Why would I go to a meeting to "get" something I don't want?

Highly suggest praying, whether you believe or not, and going with your gut. The right meetings tend to come at the right time, when we're open to it and persistent.

hopeful4

If you have a faith base you may want to try Celebrate Recovery. You could both go at the same time, but still be separate. It saved me from some of my darkest days.

tew752018

I am actually in a really good place, I do better with one on one counseling but I thought I would give an al-anon meeting a try. My mother in law is such a negative person that most have completely distanced themselves from her and I just can't see myself going to a meeting with her. I will look into Celebrate Recover though, thank you.