Nalmefene. Any experiences?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 15
Nalmefene. Any experiences?
Hi, sorry for another post.
Has anyone had experience with the drug, Nalmefene? There is a documentary called "One Little Pill" about how this drug reduces the urge to have another drink and wondered if anyone here had come across it before. It seems to be a bit like Champix for smokers.
Thanks
Has anyone had experience with the drug, Nalmefene? There is a documentary called "One Little Pill" about how this drug reduces the urge to have another drink and wondered if anyone here had come across it before. It seems to be a bit like Champix for smokers.
Thanks
Member
Join Date: Dec 2017
Posts: 356
Just like Chantix for smokers, unless you are really committed and ready to quit it more than likely won’t work. For one, unless you force it down their throat, they’re not going to take it if they don’t want to. At one alanon meeting I went to there were parents of an 17 year old girl who needed antidepressants and they literally would watch her take it and check to see if she actually swallowed it (she was having drug issues and depressed). As you can imagine that didn’t last long.
My RAH was on a similar med during rehab. It was an injectable. He didn’t need to continue it when he left after 90 days because he was doing well so I don’t know how effective it it. I do know that unless the addict is wanting help and voluntarily want to take it IN ADDITION to therapy etc it won’t work even if the med is effective. Just like birth control pill are only effective when you take them. Also a pill alone will not treat the addiction.
I’ve had many people take Chantix to stop smoking but it isn’t effective unless they are actually in a mind set that they really do want to quit for themselves. Many of them still smoke after 3 months, maybe not as much but they still smoke.
I don’t think it is bad for you to do research on these types of things as long as you understand that there is nothing that you can do for her to help her quit. Your best shot is to take care of you, learn how to set boundaries, stop trying to do things that will prevent her from drinking because in the end she will find a way and it is no way to live for you. Detach, get your life back in order (get counseling with someone who has an addiction background, do alanon, come back here) because no matter how much you try to contrôl her drinking, you can’t. You can’t be with her 24/7 7 days a week. It is useless and as you have seen it has dragged you down and made your life miserable. You deserve better than that. She has chosen alcohol, you deserve to chose a life for you. Please get help. It isn’t easy to get out of the codependent bubble, we’ve all been there, but it is necessary to get your life back on track. She is an adults and can make her own choices (obviously), if you set healthy boundaries and quit trying manage her problem and detach with love, she may realize that she needs to make a choice. She may decide quit or she may not, but that is her choice. No matter how much you want her to quit, you cannot do it for her. So take care of you and start doing things for you, find new hobbies or start back up with old ones, join a club, meet new people, get out of the house. As hard as it is you need to stop worrying about her while you are gone. I know that it is easier said than done but that is why therapy is going to be important, to help you guide your way through this.
We’ve all been there so keep coming back here for support. Get educated about alcoholism and addiction and codependency. You deserve to have your own life and activities so you can be happy and not having to take care of someone 24/7 who has decided to make bad choices for herself. You should not have to suffer because of her choices (and again, we have all been there and it has taken many of us a long time to realize this so kudos to you for seeking help now)
My RAH was on a similar med during rehab. It was an injectable. He didn’t need to continue it when he left after 90 days because he was doing well so I don’t know how effective it it. I do know that unless the addict is wanting help and voluntarily want to take it IN ADDITION to therapy etc it won’t work even if the med is effective. Just like birth control pill are only effective when you take them. Also a pill alone will not treat the addiction.
I’ve had many people take Chantix to stop smoking but it isn’t effective unless they are actually in a mind set that they really do want to quit for themselves. Many of them still smoke after 3 months, maybe not as much but they still smoke.
I don’t think it is bad for you to do research on these types of things as long as you understand that there is nothing that you can do for her to help her quit. Your best shot is to take care of you, learn how to set boundaries, stop trying to do things that will prevent her from drinking because in the end she will find a way and it is no way to live for you. Detach, get your life back in order (get counseling with someone who has an addiction background, do alanon, come back here) because no matter how much you try to contrôl her drinking, you can’t. You can’t be with her 24/7 7 days a week. It is useless and as you have seen it has dragged you down and made your life miserable. You deserve better than that. She has chosen alcohol, you deserve to chose a life for you. Please get help. It isn’t easy to get out of the codependent bubble, we’ve all been there, but it is necessary to get your life back on track. She is an adults and can make her own choices (obviously), if you set healthy boundaries and quit trying manage her problem and detach with love, she may realize that she needs to make a choice. She may decide quit or she may not, but that is her choice. No matter how much you want her to quit, you cannot do it for her. So take care of you and start doing things for you, find new hobbies or start back up with old ones, join a club, meet new people, get out of the house. As hard as it is you need to stop worrying about her while you are gone. I know that it is easier said than done but that is why therapy is going to be important, to help you guide your way through this.
We’ve all been there so keep coming back here for support. Get educated about alcoholism and addiction and codependency. You deserve to have your own life and activities so you can be happy and not having to take care of someone 24/7 who has decided to make bad choices for herself. You should not have to suffer because of her choices (and again, we have all been there and it has taken many of us a long time to realize this so kudos to you for seeking help now)
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: East Coast
Posts: 1,235
Radiolab did a podcast about addiction and the drugs employed to TREAT addiction. They featured one alcoholic who had started drinking in his teens. He did take a pharmaceutical approach to kick the habit, and he felt that AA didn't help him a bit. Unfortunately, what he found out was that he wasn't necessarily "addicted" to alcohol - he was addicted to the feelings, including confidence and self-assuredness, that alcohol gave him. Since he had started his habit in his teens, he never knew how to generate those feelings (and other coping mechanisms) for himself without the help of the bottle. And so he stopped taking the drugs so he could start drinking again.
He ended up going to AA.
He ended up going to AA.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 15
Hi Guys, yes I take everything that's been said on board and I know x10 power infinity that I need to let go of this. I think I've known every day for the past ten years what I need to do but still to this day I find it so hard to actually do it.
I'm still trying to stop her drinking and as I'm doing it I think about how free it must feel to at last say..to hell with this, I'm actually doing it right now as she's in the middle of her latest binge, I'm trying to reduce her consumption so that she becomes sober and stays like that for another undefined period of time. I just can't help myself..yet.
Since coming here yesterday I've gained some knowledge about how I can update my CV so that I can look for a new job and I know how to explain the missing 7 years that I have spent trying to change her.
She would be quite happy for me to go back to work as then she'd have free reign to be get drunk. This last happened about 5 years ago when I tried going for interviews and she was in a state, she obviously started drinking as soon as I left. One of those interviews I was successful and accepted the job but could only manage a week before I had to pack it in as she was drunk to the point of lying on the floor every night I got back home.
So for me to move on I have to be gone from this situation first. I need to finally accept that I can do nothing to make her better. I need to accept there's nothing I can do to changer her thinking. The only thing I have not tried since this situation came alone 13 years ago, is to leave, sell the house, pay off the debts and split whats left 50:50. If I do that then how to I cope with selling the house and she's in it, out of her face all the time?
I'm still trying to stop her drinking and as I'm doing it I think about how free it must feel to at last say..to hell with this, I'm actually doing it right now as she's in the middle of her latest binge, I'm trying to reduce her consumption so that she becomes sober and stays like that for another undefined period of time. I just can't help myself..yet.
Since coming here yesterday I've gained some knowledge about how I can update my CV so that I can look for a new job and I know how to explain the missing 7 years that I have spent trying to change her.
She would be quite happy for me to go back to work as then she'd have free reign to be get drunk. This last happened about 5 years ago when I tried going for interviews and she was in a state, she obviously started drinking as soon as I left. One of those interviews I was successful and accepted the job but could only manage a week before I had to pack it in as she was drunk to the point of lying on the floor every night I got back home.
So for me to move on I have to be gone from this situation first. I need to finally accept that I can do nothing to make her better. I need to accept there's nothing I can do to changer her thinking. The only thing I have not tried since this situation came alone 13 years ago, is to leave, sell the house, pay off the debts and split whats left 50:50. If I do that then how to I cope with selling the house and she's in it, out of her face all the time?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Can you just talk to a lawyer and get some ideas? If you're going to split, that's where I'd start. You're not the first person to have to work out these kinds of details, an attorney will have answers for you about getting her out of the house in order to sell.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 8,644
Originally Posted by W999 
If I do that then how to I cope with selling the house and she's in it, out of her face all the time?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 994
In the face of getting money out the house to drink my exah was remarkably sober for viewings. He even showed people round. He only drank after they had gone. I tried for 20 years to control my exah drinking but it was like holding back a dam. He's still alive and still drinking 4 year post divorce.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
