Gracey

things are clicking guys............

ASpouse

Gracey be easy on yourself. It has taken me years to understand myself to a point where I am confident to express myself with some degree of intelligence LOL.

Sometimes there is no explanation for why things are , sometimes they just are because ........ they are LOL.

Learn to love yourself and who you are. Remember, no one knows YOU as well as you do and Alcoholics love to tell us that they know us better than we know ourselves .... not exactly a good match for someone with low self esteem issues! But I know this isn't true and you will too, when the time is right!

Karivan

Gracey... I think you sound normal. You also sound like a very cool person and I'll bet you're fun to be around. Those things you like to do sound like a lot of fun. A's aren't normal and they don't want to do normal things. They want to drink or do drugs or whatever it is they're addicted to and the other things don't seem to matter. An A can't hike... they can't snow sled... or go boating or skiing. They don't have the physical stamina to do them and they can't get drunk while doing them. Also, they put other people down to make themselves feel better.

So don't put yourself down. An A can make you doubt yourself and wonder if you are normal... you are... he's not.

Gracey

I have thought that for a long time......he has to put people down to make himself feel better....I have also told him......the reason you dont want to go up north with me.......is because you cant drink......he would always make excuses saying he was too busy......and he would try to convince me not to go either.......and for alot of years it worked........I didnt go because he didnt want me to.........He didnt want me to take HIS daughter away from him the whole weekend.........he would give me the biggest guilt trip..........

I was planning for months......to go to Tennessee for Christmas last year.......We were broke.......we had to borrow money from my parents for Christmas presents for my kids...........I had $150.00 to go to Tennessee and that is all I needed was gas money..........I told my AH you cant count food we have to buy food at home........We had plans to go see my brother for Christmas..........My husband said we couldnt go..........he said it wasnt logical.........What if the car breaks down.......what if we get a flat tire...........what if we have to get a hotel room..........I told him we can apply for a new credit card and only use that for an emergency.....and cancel it when we get home..........I have a 2003 Windstar...........and last Christmas it may have had.......4,000 miles on it...........so I thought he was crazy.........Well we didnt end up going.......after many fights and lots of tears on my part......

My life changed dramatically on January 19th, 2004.....as.many of you know.......my brother......the professor at Nashville University..........the electrician.........the kindest, lovingest person........a father, a friend.......a teacher......tried to take his own life..he has been in a hospital for over 9 1/2 months now........not knowing each day if he is going to live or not.......I was told by my mom not long ago that his body was shutting down........but two weeks later he is still fighting for his life......he has been fighting for his life.........for the last 9 1/2 months...

My point is that no one will ever again......force me, manipulate me......or make me feel guilty for wanting to be with my family again......Life is too short.......

Cap3

**********{Gracey}}}}}}}}},,you and your family are in my prayers...
The total......insanity.......of alcoholism.,the family disease.ive been insane many times.Step 2.Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity....You say,no one will ever again,force me,manipulate me,or make me feel guilty for wanting to be with my family again,life is to short.Sounds to me like your doing what you need to do,for you. and thats growth.I was insane.This is what i call it for me,and im only speaking about myself here...Insanity....Doing what others want me to do,when i feel i must do something different than what they want.I know in my heart.What to do...But...I,Gave in to the pressure.Trying to keep da peace,.Didnt work..I went through the same with my hub,.Yap,yap,yap,when i wanted to visit my family.But what i noticed was even if i didnt go visit them,he would be yapping,about..something.........He always found something to yap about.lol....You go girl.Hub eventually gave it up.No words on my part just action.Getting ready to visit my parents,and family.He came to accept this.Sometimes he came ...Sometimes he didnt.And that was ok.,up to him....