tteeaacchheerr

Hi everyone,
I'm currently attending Al-Anon while my A ex boyfriend is in AA. We've been in our respective groups since November. We haven't spoken for a while, but the last time we did, we had a nice, cordial conversation.

I've been working the steps in Al-Anon, and today I reached out to him via text to ask him if we could talk sometime, as I was working Step 9. He responded with "NO!" I replied with "OK, take care." I didn't know what else to say.

I was very surprised at his response. I guess I thought he would be more understanding, as he is working the steps himself. Is this typical behavior for recovery? I'm at a loss here...

Wisconsin

I can't speak to whether it is typical of recovery or not, but I would say that you should take his words at face value and work on making your amends toward him in a way that does not involve contacting him.

Maudcat

Everyone's recovery journey is different. Good for you to try to make amends. He isn't there yet, I guess.