Telling bf about alcoholic parent
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 2
Telling bf about alcoholic parent
Hi everyone, I was just looking for some advice and came across this forum. My mum is an alcoholic and has been for the past 20 plus years. I am still living at home due to financial reasons so have to deal with her every day. I have also been seeing someone for the past few months and have met his parents and now he is asking to meet mine. I really don't want him to meet my mum cos she will be drunk and will be very embarrassing and not a good first impression and I have run out of excuses so don't know what to tell him. Should I just tell him the truth? I am worried he will not understand or will be put off.
Also I haven't even told my parents I have been seeing someone as I try and keep all my life from them cos I am so fed up with the mess I have to deal with from having an alcoholic parent and now I obviously have to tell them. How can I tell them I have been lying to them for the past few months because of my mum, it will really upset her. I feel really stressed, when I should be happy that he wants to meet my parents.
Has anyone got any advice to help me in this situation, sorry for the long post. Thanks! x
Also I haven't even told my parents I have been seeing someone as I try and keep all my life from them cos I am so fed up with the mess I have to deal with from having an alcoholic parent and now I obviously have to tell them. How can I tell them I have been lying to them for the past few months because of my mum, it will really upset her. I feel really stressed, when I should be happy that he wants to meet my parents.
Has anyone got any advice to help me in this situation, sorry for the long post. Thanks! x
I have decided to tell him the truth
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
Chloe.....I think you will feel some relief to share the truth with him.
You can't hide it forever, anyway.....
I think you might benefit from "Adult Children of Alcoholics".......
Are you aware of that organization?
dandylion
You can't hide it forever, anyway.....
I think you might benefit from "Adult Children of Alcoholics".......
Are you aware of that organization?
dandylion
Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Pacific Northwest
Posts: 163
I agree. Be honest with him. You might be supprised at what he has experienced with family members or friends and addiction. Very few people have not had to deal with a friend or family member fighting addiction.
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Sooner or later he will know. I think it's MUCH better to prepare him for it than to spring it on him, or have him stumble upon it in some other way. When you're in an intimate relationship you should be able to share the not-so-pretty parts of each other's lives (including the past). If he runs because of this, isn't it best that you find that out now?
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