sad and can't sleep
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 254
He gets angry and lashes out at you to take the focus off his own BS. Because he's embarrassed. Because he knows he's the one with the really Big Problems. Because he knows he's headed downhill and you're probably going to be doing great pretty soon. Because he can get a momentary high off of getting under your skin. Because he knows he can still push your buttons and that must mean he still has some power over someone somewhere which means he hasn't lost EVERYTHING. YET. When really, he has, or will soon if he doesn't stop ignoring his own problems. Which he can easily do while he's poking you full of needles. Which hopefully he won't have the opportunity to do again 
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 2,163
He engages with you because YOU respond.
Alcoholics love all the drama, gives them an excuse/reason to continue on their path of self destruction.
I promise, if you STOP responding, he will stop texting/phoning. It's really that simple. ( Might take a week or two, but he will lose interest and will find himself a new hostage)
You don't have to respond, but why do you think you need to be worthy of his affection?
I see you struggling with rejection, but as far as being worthy, I think you have it backwards, he is the one that is NOT worthy of your precious life and time.
You get to decide, how long you want to dance this toxic, toxic, dance.
Alcoholics love all the drama, gives them an excuse/reason to continue on their path of self destruction.
I promise, if you STOP responding, he will stop texting/phoning. It's really that simple. ( Might take a week or two, but he will lose interest and will find himself a new hostage)
You don't have to respond, but why do you think you need to be worthy of his affection?
I see you struggling with rejection, but as far as being worthy, I think you have it backwards, he is the one that is NOT worthy of your precious life and time.
You get to decide, how long you want to dance this toxic, toxic, dance.
Member
Join Date: May 2005
Location: UK and Australia
Posts: 447
I am sorry that you are here for the reasons you are.
Keep reading, keep posting and keep coming back.
many of us have been exactly where you are today......
We have learnt many things along the journey.
Time to take care of yourself and put yourself first......
I am so glad I have hopped off the merry go round with my AH. We still live under the same roof for now BUT I put myself and my children first ...and he can do what he likes.
it Sucks! We all understand your pain, upset and frustration....
Take care all the best Phiz :0)
Keep reading, keep posting and keep coming back.
many of us have been exactly where you are today......
We have learnt many things along the journey.
Time to take care of yourself and put yourself first......
I am so glad I have hopped off the merry go round with my AH. We still live under the same roof for now BUT I put myself and my children first ...and he can do what he likes.
it Sucks! We all understand your pain, upset and frustration....
Take care all the best Phiz :0)
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