shinebright7

Life is unmanageable when we try to control things that CAN'T be controlled.

But, little by little, day by day, our lives can become more manageable and filled with serenity as we focus on the things that we CAN control.

Thought it'd be helpful to make a big thread of things we CAN control so we can remember we're empowered and also be inspired to focus on ourselves. <3

shinebright7

Things I can control:

- What I eat
- What I wear
- What I watch on TV
- What websites I go to
- What I put my attention on
- When I go to sleep
- When I wake up
- Where I drive
- What groceries I buy
- What I read
- Who I hang out with
- Whether or not I answer the phone
- What I think about
- What I look at when I'm in my home
- Who I cook for
- What I listen to on the radio
- Where I get gas
- Which Al Anon meeting I go to
- Whether I speak or not at a meeting
- When I brush my teeth
- When I floss (not often enough) haha
- What color I paint my nails
- When I write back to people's emails
- Who can live with me and under what circumstances
- How deeply or shallowly I breathe
- My meditation habits
- Spending time with my cat
- Remembering good times I spent at the beach
- Who I reach out to for support

Yes yes yes! I like reminding myself of these things.

LexieCat

Absolutely right! And in my experience it's much easier to enjoy those things without having the dead weight of an active alcoholic around bringing you down.

I know some people are able to be happy while continuing to live with active alcoholism, but I was never able to manage it very well--I felt a ton lighter when I was finally on my own.

shinebright7

I need some reminders of things I can control today. I may sound like a broken record, but I need the repetition I guess.

- What kind of tea I drink
- What color socks I wear
- Whether I answer the phone or not when it rings
- Whether I take a nap or not
- What kind of work I do (that's a good reminder)
- What I eat
- What stores I go to
- What movies and shows I watch
- What I wear
- How much money I spend
- Who I send thank you cards to
- What I get friends for their birthdays
- How I spend my evenings
- Who I let into my car
- What tires I put on my car
- When I pay my rent
- Where I live
- Who I live with
- What I say.
- What I listen to on the radio
- What I focus my attention on.
- How long I meditate
- Thinking of gratitudes
- Remembering happy times
- Who I spend time with

Deep breath. Yes, good to remember...

lillamy

This is one of my favorite old discussions about what we really can control...

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rol-scary.html