Catareta

We have had a whirlwind month since posting. BF admitted to me he wanted to commit suicide - Thankfully he had a GP appt and admitted it to her, but did not mdntion it to the mentsl heslth team. His diagnosis is depression secondary to alcohol dependency. He is relutant to have counselling and antidepressants aren't safe to high risk drinking.

I am sitting here on my own as he has his first day on work trial, he was bricking himself and poured 2 glasses of wine to help him through.. I confronted it and said deep breaths could help but he said leave it, don't need a lecture.feeling lost to be honest.

Looked into Al Anon but due to me being visually impaired I can't get there. His family are concerned and told me he was drinking 5 bottles of wine, had a yellow tinge etc last year before starting college.

Arghh.. Just want him to get help - hopefully work trial will cone through so hd has something to motivate self.

honeypig

Hi, Catareta--regarding Alanon, have you called the main office in your area and asked if anyone can give you a ride? I'd be so very surprised if there wasn't someone who'd be happy to help you out, either from the office or from the meeting you wish to attend.

There are also electronic meetings listed here http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/electronic-meetings, but I'd recommend trying to get to an in-person meeting if that's at all possible.

It's unlikely that a job will cure his alcoholism or his depression or whatever his issues may be. Your best bet is going to be to work on you, even if it's the last thing you want to do.

Wishing you strength and clarity.

lillamy

That's a really good idea. I know my meeting had a few older ladies who no longer drove, and people took turns giving them a ride.

maia1234

C- reach out and get some help. His sobriety has nothing to do with you. He needs to hit rock bottom before he will realize his life is out of control. By codependents helping him he will never reach that. I know you love him but he needs to do this on his own.

Good for you for reaching out for help. We are all here to support you, as we are all going through or have gone through our own hell with our addict that we love. Try and hit a meeting, those people are priceless. Keep reading the stickies and educate yourself on addiction. There is no form on how to get our addict sober, as if they don't want it they wont do it. My stbxah told me that "he has to die from something" .

Read, read and read more and educate yourself. Good luck!!