Can someone help me. I'm feeling confused.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 524
Yea I guess I am winning by reaching out here. I have been engaging all afternoon. I just can’t seem to help myself today. I have been pretty decent with how and when I respond if at all, but today I just feel like calling him everything but a white man. I’m not nearly as nasty as I want to be though, if I am going to get in the mud I may as well go for it. The new place is really good hawkeye. I’m still taking it all in, still processing. I am still entertaining all of the wonderful people in my life that want to come by and see the new place (my co-worker friend wants to come tonight) and I am grateful but I am tired and I feel defeated today. And I need help. I need something. I need to read my Melody Beattie Book or find a meeting this weekend. Something immediate that will shift my thinking. I’m sitting at my desk at work and maybe I will silently pray here for a while.
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
meggem....it is perfectly natural and normal to have feelings of frustration and anger at the person who is causing us discomfort or pain. If these feelings are just stuffed...after a while the tension builds up inside to a boiling point.
When I get overwhelmed with the built up anger..I am a big fan (and practioner) of the "wailing wall". One finds a place where it is safe to yell---like the edge of the ocean--or near the woods or open pasture--the top of a building--or if you are home alone.
Then...you let it RIP..without any censorship at all. Pretend that the other person is there, and yell everything that you are feeling. Call every name, say every mean thing; say every thought that comes to your mind--no matter how "crazy" or inappropriate it might ordinarily seem. Cry; scream as loud or as mean as you can; do it until you are exhausted---and until your eyes are swollen and the mascara is running down...and the snot is running.
This gives such a release of the negative energy.
Try it....you will be very surprised at what happens...
dandylion
When I get overwhelmed with the built up anger..I am a big fan (and practioner) of the "wailing wall". One finds a place where it is safe to yell---like the edge of the ocean--or near the woods or open pasture--the top of a building--or if you are home alone.
Then...you let it RIP..without any censorship at all. Pretend that the other person is there, and yell everything that you are feeling. Call every name, say every mean thing; say every thought that comes to your mind--no matter how "crazy" or inappropriate it might ordinarily seem. Cry; scream as loud or as mean as you can; do it until you are exhausted---and until your eyes are swollen and the mascara is running down...and the snot is running.
This gives such a release of the negative energy.
Try it....you will be very surprised at what happens...
dandylion
Baby Steps
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 1,689
I don't know how the legal system works where you are but I definitely agree with the advice previously given. As I said I don't know how the legal system works but if it has been agreed that you both pay half of everything should he not be giving you half of the money you spend on the children ie their daycare??
Do you really have to pay spousal support to him when the children live with you??
Do you really have to pay spousal support to him when the children live with you??
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