amy55

This is really embarrassing.

After my ex gave me a black eye, and I called 911, then spent the night in a hospital, I told my ex that I think if he would go to Domestic Abuse classes voluntarily, that the judge might go easy on him.

amy55

I went from that, to a few years later ---- I would tell him that I didn't like something, he would start singing "I gotta be me", I would then put on Pink Floyd, and listen to and sing to him, "there's a lunatic inside my head, but it's not me, until he left the room that I was in.

embraced2000

amy......

yes!!!! did that one too. omg.....

i married him and divorced him twice. first time around on the psycho rollercoaster wasn't enough for me, i reckon. i am a slow learner.

filed my own divorce both times. but i paid for and filed divorce papers four times! (i know...i know...pitiful)

the first time i went into library to get papers for filing, the librarian sensed my torture and babied me....i burst into tears, she placed me in a chair, and got me a drink. made me near hysterical.

second time i went to library for same, i was kinda calloused by then and was joking with her.

third time i went, i informed her my visit this time was to help a friend.

fourth time i went, i went to a different library.

lillamy

When I stopped being a pushover, things got ugly.
I know it's not an encouraging answer, but it is what happened to me.
Any time I stood up for myself, AXH would take it out on the kids.
One kid in particular, the one he thought he wasn't the father of (because that one looks more like me than like him).
I think this is why he never "needed" to hit me: He had full control over me by punishing the kids when I did something he didn't like. He knew he could get to me that way.

I stopped being a pushover when he threatened to kill me and the kids. I left. It was a 180 degree turn and I never looked back.

hopeful4

How awful. Hugs, Hugs, and more Hugs. You are a strong lady!
XXX

FireSprite

On the night that I consider MY rock bottom, I showed up at home late after work & picking up my niece to find AH in the drive, still in the driver's seat of his truck, passed old cold with his foot still on the brake pedal. Then watched him CRAWL from there, up the steps to the house, through the entire house to the master bathroom all the while slurring incoherently about how he wasn't drunk, couldn't understand what the problem was, etc. I have never felt so much boiling rage as I did in that moment - I was horrified that he had driven in that state, in a Mama Bear dither over the kids seeing him like that & blown away that he would sit there continually lying to my face in between spells of vomiting up the very evidence he was trying to hide.

I couldn't help it - I literally kicked him in the arse while he was down & lying in a pool of his own drool on his hands & knees.

Step away from the addict.

I wanted to physically hurt him so badly that it scared me & I had to force myself to walk away. I had never, ever been a physical person & I was finally able to see that I was becoming as sick & twisted as he was.

LightInside

Have I ever mentioned that my XA and I intentionally conceived our son? Yeah! for fear-based decision making ! And I suspect that X thought it would get him sober. Two crazy quackers pretending to live the dream. Ugh. At least I got my biggest dream in life out of it. I just also got my worst nightmare.

Blossom717

I've said all the normal stuff. But probably one of my finest moments was putting legos in his boots when he'd pass out. Just to make his morning extra comfortable while getting ready for work hungover

Blossom717

forgot about this one:
When I was nearly 9 months pregnant, he knocked down two tables at a local restaurant, had to be carried out. When we got to the house I had to drag him to the middle of the front yard "so he wouldn't hit his head and bleed out on the sidewalk". He was there for 5 hours, and woke up in bug bites!

Whoopsie

lillamy

I was howling with laughter at this one! Yeah, we are a special kind of crazy, aren't we?

LoveMeNow

My husband was addicted to pain pills but occasionally/progressively drank too! I refused to allow him to come home or come in if he had been drinking. Yep, that was my boundary....no drunks allowed.

I firmed up that boundary to no active addiction allowed in my home.

POAndrea

You're too kind! I used to leave Himself wherever he fell, until one early December morning I saw him sleeping it off in the driveway with his beard all frosty. I figured I better start dragging him into the house, at least until it warmed up again.

LoveMeNow

I had small dogs! If he was passed out from drinking....."somehow" those little dogs would hear noises that caused them to bark.....all night.

If I was too mad to sleep, he wasn't going to either.

HopefulinFLA

A little passive aggression never hurts. ;-) Love it!

OnawaMiniya

I just let out the most evil chuckle after reading that lol.....

Heh heh heh....

Peace.

shari07

I wish I could feel numb too

Glad I'm worthless to you

I know you don't care, but I just wish this was as easy for me. I think you like to hurt me as much as possible and I really do not understand that.

I threw all his shoes/boots out in the snow so when he went to leave to drink more he'd have to walk outside in socks(wow did he throw a temper tantrum, i laughed my a&$ off)

Locked him in the basement once

Hmmmmm I've said pretty much what everyone else has and so much more

LoveMeNow

Oh and how about hiding car keys, wallets and/or cell phones??

Aeryn

Some of my favorites:

"He is really trying this time..."
"He is doing better today..."


These are ones I thought but never said aloud:

"I'm going to help him, just because I'm a good person" (LOL...I used to do that!!!! I never said it aloud but I certainly thought it. eeek)

"I need to stay in this marriage because what will everyone think? I can make this work and make us look good!" (EEEEEK!!!) I used to spend days (after 10 hour work days up til 3 or 4am) cleaning our mess of a house for a holiday so the in-laws (who were also A's BTW) would think we were doing well. LOLOLOL!!!

I'm so glad I'm not in a relationship like that with an A anymore...eeek...I'm progress not perfection but I've come a long way from the all night house cleaning.

Stung

My best quack that I said over and over and over again: "WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME????!!!"

LoveMeNow

When I first joined here, I actually posted this......and this was one of my first introductions to Anvil. Needless to stay, I wasn't happy by her dead on response.

"If I leave him, what will happen to him?"

Update - 2 years later, he has shown me he is fully capable of taking care of himself!!