Avoiding Pain
Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: right here, right now
Posts: 6,516
I think I've mentioned the book "Crucial Conversations" here before? My boss considers it required reading for everyone in the office, so I approached it with a ho-hum attitude, but found it extremely helpful. It talks about how when conversations get "crucial" (important and emotional), many of us choose "silence or violence" -- that is, either we get controlling, aggressive, and pushy, or we withdraw and don't contribute our opinions. Either way, you don't contribute to the conversation in a helpful way. So the book suggests methods for finding ways to overcome your "instinctual" way of reacting to conflict and contribute in a helpful and productive way. I'm working on it, but I still hate conflict and pain.
The communication techniques I'm learning from this book would not have worked with an alcoholic. It's things I can use in my life now, at work and at home.
It is still true that you cannot apply rational principles to irrational people.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 11,481
Thanks for the bump. There's a lot of good stuff here, definitely helpful for me to re-read it. I find that I understand things very differently over time, when my perspective has changed and my learning has (hopefully) increased.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
