hisimage48

This is what my AH will say when talking about drinking.

"Before dinner, lets grab a couple beers."
"Maybe we can pack a couple beers on ice, go to the beach. And so on....

Funny ; I don't drink so there really is NO we. A couple? I thought a couple was 2. He really means , gonna drink till I can't.

Anyone else? What does yours say?

Sueski

In our house, I think a couple means about six, but I'm not sure.

The other night, he came in, stumbling, and said, "I had a couple of beers. Sorry!" Parked his truck so crooked it made me laugh (because he is the parking police if anybody else parks crooked).

I think "a few" is more than "a couple" in alchy math.

roxy68

I have one of those to. He says he only has 2-3 beers a night. Really? I can have 2-3 beers and not slur my words and I hardly ever drink. So, for someone who drinks 2-3 beers everyday I really shouldn't be able to tell he has been drinking, right? So slurred words and walking funny are the result of 2-3 beers? Hmmm... should probably go to the doctor to see what is wrong.

Sunshine888

Every night my AH would come home from work and say he only had a couple of beers. Every night. You breath wreaks from two beers? Your skin stinks from two beers? Your eyes are glazed from two beers?

hisimage48

Yes, they can get pretty creative. Mine suddenly tried a new ale, pretty tasty he says. Interesting it has a lot more alcohol in it than most beers. Too bad I can't read and know nothing about that kind of thing.

PippiLngstockng

Mine too. Two. Super big, extra strong. Chugging them in the liquor store parking lot before driving home. Drunk.

After that - who knows?

BadCompany

No, he really means it. When you dance with a gorilla, you aren't done dancing until the gorilla is done dancing. An alcoholic really means it when they say just a few or just one more. The problem is we just can't master that decision. The alcohol takes over and he has no ability to control it. Until he understands and accepts that fact he will continue to get the same results he always gets.

HopefulinFLA

Thanks for posting BadCompany. I really do appreciate insights from the other side of the fence.

I've figured that out with my AH. Why he keeps trying to master it is beyond me. Same stupid crap keeps happening because of it day after day.

In our home it's "I just popped into the bar for a couple of cocktails." Which equates to about 6 beers and at least as many shots.

BadCompany

Yeah, this is why all those old "temperance" movements ultimately became abstinence movements.

LaTeeDa

I'll never forget the time my AH was talking on the phone to his parents. They must have asked him about his drinking, because he said "I only have a couple of drinks in the evening." And as he said it, I watched him pour half of a fifth of vodka into a giant "big gulp" sized cup and top it off with a shot of Gatorade. But, he wasn't lying. He only had two of those every night, lol.

L

bird13

haha, my ex told me two weeks ago in a blackout by the way!! ... " I came home, and went to the bar and had a couple beers to discuss something about work.. " how many? oh.. 2 stellas..

BoxinRotz

AH only has couple. A couple pints of vodka!

healthyagain

LOL, this reminds me of my husband when he buys us a bottle of wine for anniversary (or brandy for special occasions), and then drinks it by himself behind my back, usually when he does not have enough beer.

Duh dumbass

nbay2013

I cringe when I read this. Not knowing for a couple years my now ExBf was drinking alcoholically, I was really confused. He always said the same thing...he had "A couple". I had limited experience with mixed drinks; being a wine drinker myself; so I started making his favorite drink, a martini, when we were first dating. I followed the recipe; a 1 1/2 shots vodka, vermouth, olive juice, olive. I laugh (darkly) now, as I realize that was like a thimble for him. No wonder he never seemed buzzed in the beginning. Later I realized, "a couple" was I believe 6 shots each; so 12 shots vodka.

again...cringe.

POAndrea

And the funny thing is, I think Himself really BELIEVES this shite! He honestly thinks he's only had a couple, because those are the only ones he can remember. I have to snoop and check the outside trashcan, under the sofa, behind the rhododendron, the neighbors' trashcans for empties to get a more accurate picture of the day's consumption.

Missus

I wonder if this problem with counting is related to the warping of time when they are drinking ... my AH used to be on what I called "shed time" or "bloke time" - we would go to visit his brother (himself an incredibly heavy drinker) and I would be stuck talking with the SIL, being told every half hour or hour by AH that we were going in ten minutes... In shed time (where they were drinking) it might have been ten minutes, in real time it was usually five or six hours *sigh*. He still does it, if we're going out somewhere and we're "leaving in five", it's generally more like thirty.

Yurt

I attended a presentation at the school where I work that was intended to inspire youngsters to avoid drinking. The law enforcement officers that were guest speakers commented that typically, when they pulled over suspects for dui, you could multiply the number of drinks that the suspects claimed to drink by 4. So, a couple of beers usually meant 8.

Wavy

XABF said he was going for "a pint" after work or whatever. I'm notorious for taking things literally, so I would be so mad when he didn't come home until 5am stinking of booze and unable to walk. LOL.

I feel like I've acquired an internal babel fish over the last 8 years that translates his drunklish for me into terms I understand. "going for a pint" becomes "won't be home tonight". "Might meet X for a drink later" becomes "definitely going to get out my face later". "Just one more then we can go" means "I'm not leaving until the bells has well and truly gone and the bouncers have to help me out onto the street" etc etc

BoxinRotz

I hate the time warp that comes with the drink! My 20 minutes is his 4 hours which translates to...

You've been gone for 4 hours just to get pop! Go back to your effin boyfriend!

Wisconsin

One of my AH's favorite lines is "there's nothing wrong with having a couple of beers after work!"

Well first of all, when you are an alcoholic there absolutely IS something wrong with having a couple of beers. Second of all, he NEVER has a couple of beers. It is ALWAYS at least 6. Fortunately for me, I finally got smart and just stopped pointing this out. It's the truth, and I know it's the truth, and that's all that matters.