fluffyflea

So the moral of the story is to become inner focussed rather than outer focussed and change the negative tapes in my head.And d keep the inner child at bay when it starts having tantrums.

FireSprite

For me, this was my recovery 'beginning' more than my 'moral'.

Once I was able to separate the internal/external & learned to handle the external factors differently (detachment, no obsessing, no taking these things on as my 'own' responsibilities), I started tackling my internal ones.

While in the beginning I kept my inner child 'at bay' as you say, now I am working on trying to identify my IC triggers, figuring out if I can heal any of that leftover pain/insecurity & how to take that new information forward in a more healthy way. Now it's a matter of listening to my IC, not necessarily supressing her.

seek

I have been working with my inner child - and I am not sure where you are coming from, re: keeping your inner child "at bay." What I have learned is that my inner child is very scared and needs a lot of reassurance that "I" (the parent now) will take care of her, as she was not taken care of before . . .it is her getting freaked out and acting out that causes a lot of my problems - because when she gets triggered, she is in charge . . .but if I reassure her (and actually pay attention to her), then she is actually nurtured.

Sometimes my inner child needs to be spoken to lovingly - sometimes told that I will not take her places that scare her - sometimes she likes a massage or to get in her jammies - I try to feed her healthy food, etc.

But engaging with her seems to be a key way of taking care of her. Just letting her know that her needs are important and that "I" will do my best to take care of her. I talk to her out loud and that seems to do the trick. I call her "Little (my name)." And she responds.

firebolt

The inner child is the hard part for sure - this is a huge work in progress for me, and I forget to monitor it often, but I'm getting there. Hard to find a balance between calming the tantrums, redirecting it's negative energy, boosting its self responsibility, and reminding it to play like crazy in mud puddles when it sees one - even if it doesn't feel like it.

fluffyflea

The inner child is acting up right now,begiinning to cause some anxiety. So I,m taking her and focussing on our warm house and wood stove,lit somecandles and watching a movie. Don,t let het start obsessing because she feels her needs aren,t being met.

Katiekate

I totally get that!!!!!