Redroof

We have been married for 21+ years. He has been on anti depressants since before I even knew him. At the moment he is on 3 antidepressants, 2 twice a day and 1 morning only. Wellbutrin, Effexor and Alazopram. He has been abusing alcohol and marijuana for the past 2 years since he involuntarily retired at 65. He is 67 and I amd 52. He has never discussed his use of beer or pot with his doctor. He sees no problem with these. He got arrested for DUI and possesion of marijuana last month. He blew a .13 and that is not counting the effects of the pot. He went back out for a beer the following night and doesn't think he did anything wrong. He goes out most nights. Sometimes starting at lunch even. Should I make his Dr aware of this, and if so how? He has always gone to the same Dr. office, but his doctors have changed frequently lately as his old Dr retired. I don't think I'd have much luck trying to call and talk to him. I could send a note a week or two before his regular appointment in a couple of months. Serinity and detachment are all very well, but how much nothing am I expected to do? I have been attending Al Anon meetings since Sept. I get more concrete information from this site.

BoxinRotz

I told AH's dr of his alcohol abuse because he told the dr his antidepressant wasn't working. Thing with AH is that he likes me in the room n he won't lie about any of it if I say it is true. His dr told him he won't change the meds if he's drinking but he needs to stop to get full benefits from the meds. He told him once you drink too much, the meds aren't effective. I had a feeling that's why they weren't working.

FeelingGreat

Hi, in a completely different context my sisters and I gave our mother's doctor some information about her. Best to do it in writing, and don't expect any feedback as they can't discuss the patient with you.

thislonelygirl

You could go with him and blurt it out or if you know he has another appointment call before hand and ask to speak with the dr. Never been in the situation but perhapse telling the dr flat out is best. I dunno your hubby so I dunno how he would react to that but I agree his doctor should be awarefor his health and possibly so your ah can hear from a doctor how his drinking is a problem

Recovering2

I have a health care background. I can tell you, I would consider that important information in the care of my patient. But HIPPA laws can get tricky. So no promises anyone would be comfortable discussing his medical issues on the phone. It's different if it's a Dr that's known you for a long time. But if there are new Dr's they may not be as comfortable. It would be worth trying, I would do it a day or 2 before the appt so it's fresh in their memory. If it doesn't work on the phone, my best advice is to go to his next appointment with him. Marijuana is a depressant, as is alcohol. No amount of anti-depressants will work effectively against that.

Hopeworks

The benzos magnify the effects of the alcohol manyfold and you are NOT supposed to drink at all taking these. Doctors in the know on addiction will not prescribe benzos to an alcoholic except very short term for initial detox.

Benzos plus alcohol in quantity can produce blackout and I have seen a lot of tragedy including loss of life.

I would share the alcohol problem and I also would do it in writing certified. But thats just me... total control freak in recovery but not well entirely yet.

ForeverOptimist

I think this may be one of those times when you should do what you feel is best, but do not expect a certain outcome. My AH is also on anti-depressants and anti-anxiety medication. A while ago his doctor wanted to send him to a neurologist to find out why he had the shakes... (hmm....), so I called his doctor to fill her in on what was REALLY going on. I know she couldn't really discuss anything about AH, but she basically told me to get support for myself. I felt good telling her so she has all the information, but it hasn't changed what she prescribes for him at all. For me, it was one of those moments when I just had to let go and realize that I've done what I can do and I can't control what happens next. In the end, it's AH's health that is compromised so if he chooses to be less than honest with his doctor, that is his choice. Maybe you'll have a different experience -- I'd like to think our medical professionals are aware of how alcohol abuse and depression are linked, and how mixing alcohol and medications is not a good idea, but sadly that is not the reality in all cases. Good luck to you.

BrokenHeartWife

My AH won't let me in the room with his doctors because he doesn't want me telling them the truth. lol. he likes to tell each doctor a controlled story so that he can get whatever meds he wants.

For the longest time I didn't know the extent of my AH's alcohol abuse since he rarely drank while I was awake, so when his anti-depressants stopped working I didn't know why.

He was also taking anti-anxiety drugs while drinking, which of course the doctor didn't know....very dangerous.

It's very hard on doctors when addicts lie to them...they can end up prescribing the wrong things.

Redroof

My Ah also has the shakes especially in the am. I have to put his meds in a daily dispensing box for the week so they don't all end up on the floor and down the sink drain. A counselor I talked to suggested that long term use of some prescription drugs can cause neurological damage that causes this.