When tragedy strikes
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: ny/nj
Posts: 182
When tragedy strikes
Being the recovering control freak that I am, I was wondering (ahead of time) how some of you handle things with your estranged A when tragedy strikes. Mine AXF has an 87 year old parent, not in the best of health. So, when he passes, do I send a card? Go to the visitation? Not sure what the reasonable, kind, and HEALTHY FOR ME response should be.
Just wondering
Just wondering
peaceful seabird
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: floating
Posts: 4,822
My AXH lost his best friend last August to lung cancer.
When I learned of the death, I told him I was sorry for his loss. He shared a few sentences about how he felt over this loss (comparing it to my parents deaths over cancer). I had known this friend of his for many years during our marriage, but I did not think it was healthy for me to return to the community for funeral services.
My X's parents are both alive.
My X and I have a child together (16 y.o.)
When his parents pass, I will be sure our child participates at whatever level she is comfortable with.
When a tragedy strikes, be honest with yourself about what your motivations are for becoming involved. Then make a decision that brings you peace.
When I learned of the death, I told him I was sorry for his loss. He shared a few sentences about how he felt over this loss (comparing it to my parents deaths over cancer). I had known this friend of his for many years during our marriage, but I did not think it was healthy for me to return to the community for funeral services.
My X's parents are both alive.
My X and I have a child together (16 y.o.)
When his parents pass, I will be sure our child participates at whatever level she is comfortable with.
When a tragedy strikes, be honest with yourself about what your motivations are for becoming involved. Then make a decision that brings you peace.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Anchorage, Alaska
Posts: 4,719
Do what makes you comfortable.
One of the greatest lessons to be learned throughout our journeys with addicts/alcoholics is learning to listen to ourselves again.
To be self aware, to pay attention to those feelings, to filter the little voice in our head, to trust our gut instincts.
Take each situation as it comes, and gauge your level of comfort each time.
One of the greatest lessons to be learned throughout our journeys with addicts/alcoholics is learning to listen to ourselves again.
To be self aware, to pay attention to those feelings, to filter the little voice in our head, to trust our gut instincts.
Take each situation as it comes, and gauge your level of comfort each time.
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