nightmare
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 181
Ok i should've made it clear I started to ask for divine intervention before I started posting here..Since then I have read books about my happiness and inner voice and that voice is what started me thinking and realize that for obvious reasons our family isnt completely happy and then started posting here. The kids dont live in fear all day everyday..we went to the kids school musicals last night and tonight and played at the park. But AH was drinking some before and even now and its been ok except my boy did tell the neighbor girl that his dad was drunk.
Belgian Sheepdog Adictee
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: In Today
Posts: 6,101
The kids dont live in fear all day everyday..we went to the kids school musicals last night and tonight and played at the park. But AH was drinking some before and even now and its been ok except my boy did tell the neighbor girl that his dad was drunk.
As I told you in one of your very early threads, if you do NOT believe that your children are hurting all the time from this and that this will have a profound affect on them (your son is already exhibiting behavior like his father) then go over to our Adult Children of A's forum
Adult Children of Addicted/Alcoholic Parents - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
and do a LOT of reading to see just how this will affect them into adulthood.
Please, please, remove yourself and the children. Talk with your local DV center and get help from them, including counseling for yourself and your children.
This situation is escalating and will continue to do so until one or more of you is terribly physically hurt.
J M H O
Love and hugs,
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Leaving is the most dangerous time in an abusive relationship. Please call a Women's helpline and put a safe plan in place.
You may have not seen the bruises or physical damage yet in your children, but inside they are already victims who need help to escape from the emotional and mental abuse.
Please remove yourself (safely) from this relationship, get some counseling and think about what you want to do from a safe distance.
Keeping you and your children in my prayers.
Hugs
You may have not seen the bruises or physical damage yet in your children, but inside they are already victims who need help to escape from the emotional and mental abuse.
Please remove yourself (safely) from this relationship, get some counseling and think about what you want to do from a safe distance.
Keeping you and your children in my prayers.
Hugs
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Washington, DC
Posts: 456
Dear TCB5568,
My heart goes out to you and your children. I can relate to your post as a mother and as an adult child of an alcoholic.
I have a son who is 9. Reading what your son is saying/feeling actually brought tears to my eyes. Absolutely no 8 year-old should feel like this.
The affects of growing up in an alcoholic home are devastating. I'm in my late forties and am still dealing the with repercussion of my own childhood. My childhood wasn't "that bad" either. I have heard and read about much worse.
Even if the alcoholic isn't mean/bad/violent all the time, the damage is still being done. When a child lives in a chaotic environment that lacks consistency they develop dysfunctional tendencies that can stay with them their ENTIRE life.
My father grew up in an alcoholic home and in turn became an alcoholic himself.
My mother grew up with a verbally abusive mother and in turn married an abusive man.
The cycle continues until SOMEONE does something to break the cycle.
I hope you find the love, support, and courage you need to help create the life that you and your children deserve. Can you imagine having every night be like the night you stayed up late with your children? Can you imagine how wonderful it would feel to live in a peaceful home?
Sending you strength,
db
My heart goes out to you and your children. I can relate to your post as a mother and as an adult child of an alcoholic.
I have a son who is 9. Reading what your son is saying/feeling actually brought tears to my eyes. Absolutely no 8 year-old should feel like this.
The affects of growing up in an alcoholic home are devastating. I'm in my late forties and am still dealing the with repercussion of my own childhood. My childhood wasn't "that bad" either. I have heard and read about much worse.
Even if the alcoholic isn't mean/bad/violent all the time, the damage is still being done. When a child lives in a chaotic environment that lacks consistency they develop dysfunctional tendencies that can stay with them their ENTIRE life.
My father grew up in an alcoholic home and in turn became an alcoholic himself.
My mother grew up with a verbally abusive mother and in turn married an abusive man.
The cycle continues until SOMEONE does something to break the cycle.
I hope you find the love, support, and courage you need to help create the life that you and your children deserve. Can you imagine having every night be like the night you stayed up late with your children? Can you imagine how wonderful it would feel to live in a peaceful home?
Sending you strength,
db
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