What was the reaction when you asked them to leave...?
Today is a New Day
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 1,766
I changed the deadbolt, since it wasn't his legal address anyway, and he wasn't smart enough to know he could contest that (and his lawyer children thankfully decided not to point that out). I couldn't change the other locks, but the deadbolt was enough to keep him out, thankfully.
"I'm never going to drink again! I promise! I've put you through enough already! It's the new me! You deserve so much better.
"...By the way, you owe me a deadbolt key."
"I'm never going to drink again! I promise! I've put you through enough already! It's the new me! You deserve so much better.
"...By the way, you owe me a deadbolt key."
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 35
Originally Posted by Cyranoak 
...let me help you out because I too had to separate from a drunk:
1. I love you, why would you throw away x years of marriage, " just like that." I'm not. I'm considering x years of your behaviors and my misery. I didn't marry to be my husband's mommy, I married to be my husband's wife. Now I'm leaving because it's better than staying.
2. Thats not fair, I deserve another chance. What's not fair is what you've put me through for x years. You are out of chances and you don't deserve another one.
3. I can't leave....What about the kids ( we have 2 boys under 9 ). I'm leaving precisely to protect the kids and myself from more damage from your alcoholism. Alcoholics make terrible fathers.
4. I can't be on my own, I'm no good on my own. You're also no good with me and the boys and I can't allow you to damange them any more than you already have.
5. I have no where to go. You're a grown man. You'll figure it out.
6. I will do x, y and z if you let me stay. No, you won't. You'll promise to do so, maybe even do it for a bit, but as soon as you think I'm softened back up you'll go right back to the bottle (or maybe even sooner). Rehab and AA for the rest of your life is the only thing I'll even entertain, and even so you still have to leave until you demonstrate success and committment in your recovery. Even then I can't promise anything, but without it I can promise there's no chance at all.
7. What about Christmas?!! Don't worry about Christmas-- it'll come whether you are here or not and will frankly be better with a sober household.
Good luck,
Cyranoak
1. I love you, why would you throw away x years of marriage, " just like that." I'm not. I'm considering x years of your behaviors and my misery. I didn't marry to be my husband's mommy, I married to be my husband's wife. Now I'm leaving because it's better than staying.
2. Thats not fair, I deserve another chance. What's not fair is what you've put me through for x years. You are out of chances and you don't deserve another one.
3. I can't leave....What about the kids ( we have 2 boys under 9 ). I'm leaving precisely to protect the kids and myself from more damage from your alcoholism. Alcoholics make terrible fathers.
4. I can't be on my own, I'm no good on my own. You're also no good with me and the boys and I can't allow you to damange them any more than you already have.
5. I have no where to go. You're a grown man. You'll figure it out.
6. I will do x, y and z if you let me stay. No, you won't. You'll promise to do so, maybe even do it for a bit, but as soon as you think I'm softened back up you'll go right back to the bottle (or maybe even sooner). Rehab and AA for the rest of your life is the only thing I'll even entertain, and even so you still have to leave until you demonstrate success and committment in your recovery. Even then I can't promise anything, but without it I can promise there's no chance at all.
7. What about Christmas?!! Don't worry about Christmas-- it'll come whether you are here or not and will frankly be better with a sober household.
Good luck,
Cyranoak
Milly...were you in my living room this morning?
Cyr....why weren't you in my living room this morning?
Sorry, I know it's an old thread but I'm new here.
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