returntonormal

I've been lurking on this board off-and-on for a few months and want to thank all of you for sharing. It really helps to know I'm not alone.

I have seven months of sobriety as of yesterday and am actively working on my own recovery from alcoholism. Sober life is truly amazing in so many ways.

However, in sobriety, I am having to face something I knew was there all along. My husband is an alcoholic (or a problem drinker, or whatever) but will not admit that he has a problem (only that sometimes he has too much). Unfortunately, he shows all of the classic signs - it's hard to miss them when you attend AA and read the big book. He never takes any responsibility for his own issues, he blames me for everything, he's nasty when he's drunk (and often when he's sober). Some days I look at him and truly love him, but I've recently come to realize that my desire for a happy family is so powerful that I've been pretending he'll change. I've been pretending that he will realize how great it is to be sober and then change. Even though I'm an alcoholic myself and should totally know better.

At this point, I don't have a question for you, just wanted to thank everyone for posting. I need to figure out whether to stay or go. Rather, I think I need to figure out how to go. After ten years of the same, I'm just not up for the continued descent in the elevator. I don't want to be here when he hits bottom.

MyBetterWorld

Welcome and good luck in your recovery. And don't forget that his recovery has to be his and his alone.....
M

fourmaggie

^^totally agree with that statement....also, he sees changes in you....everything has changed! and well, he dont like that....

you keep doing your recovery...just remember


the 3 C's
you did not cause this
you can not control this
and you can not cure this

god bless you and your recovery...
~Maggie