Physical symptoms after hearing from STBXAH
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Reality, NJ
Posts: 853
Physical symptoms after hearing from STBXAH
Hello ((SR)),
I had posted a few days ago how my stbxah had texted me with a picture of a newborn baby. And most know I really wanted a baby and it was a low blow. It hurt me. I have blocked him now. But I wanted to share this. Since that text I have been depressed. Havent slept well. My upper back which has given me no issues for months is killing me and I am exhausted and sad.
All it took is one text message from him and it's like a train hit me. Lesson learned. If I want to be happy, I need to stay far away from him and the NC needs to be very strict or else I end up as I am now. Its just so shocking to me how my body reacted. WOW.
Hugs
Lulu
I had posted a few days ago how my stbxah had texted me with a picture of a newborn baby. And most know I really wanted a baby and it was a low blow. It hurt me. I have blocked him now. But I wanted to share this. Since that text I have been depressed. Havent slept well. My upper back which has given me no issues for months is killing me and I am exhausted and sad.
All it took is one text message from him and it's like a train hit me. Lesson learned. If I want to be happy, I need to stay far away from him and the NC needs to be very strict or else I end up as I am now. Its just so shocking to me how my body reacted. WOW.
Hugs
Lulu
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Oh, yeah,
I remember I once saw a guy in the lobby of my apartment who looked, at first glance, like my second alcoholic ex-husband. I went into panic mode, the adrenaline was unbelievable, and I felt shaky for a few days after.
It wasn't him, he was many states away. Still, it threw me for a loop because I wasn't expecting it.
As much as you wanted a baby, you can be grateful you didn't have HIS baby. Once you have kids together, it's virtually impossible to avoid contact.
I remember I once saw a guy in the lobby of my apartment who looked, at first glance, like my second alcoholic ex-husband. I went into panic mode, the adrenaline was unbelievable, and I felt shaky for a few days after.
It wasn't him, he was many states away. Still, it threw me for a loop because I wasn't expecting it.
As much as you wanted a baby, you can be grateful you didn't have HIS baby. Once you have kids together, it's virtually impossible to avoid contact.
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,910
Lexie is right. You are very lucky not to have had any children with him. As it stands now, you never have to deal with him again and can go on to possibly meet someone healthy with whom you can start a family. He was just being a jerk sending you that picture.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 143
I completely understand, and I am sorry that you had to feel that way. My XABF called the other night and I immediately felt like I was going to vomit. My adrenaline was rushing and I could hear my stomach churning. It always amazes me how feelings can manifest themselves physically, stress is such an awful, awful thing.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: California
Posts: 182
Sometimes our bodies give us answers just as clearly or more so than our minds. A stomachache/headache for me is far more honest than the mental gymnastics and justifications I do in my head. Hope you get to feeling better soon LuLu.
I Love Who I Am
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Midwest
Posts: 3,210
I believe we make ourselves sick by the things we say to ourselves. Try saying, out loud, positive affirmations to counter the negative things you'll find you have been saying about yourself.
Here are mine:
I love and approve of myself
I experience love wherever I go
I am my own authority on levels
I love who I am
Look up Louise Hay affirmation. If you buy the book, you can look up specific areas of dis-ease you may be experience, find the cause and speak directly to it. Sounds crazy, I know, but works.
Here are mine:
I love and approve of myself
I experience love wherever I go
I am my own authority on levels
I love who I am
Look up Louise Hay affirmation. If you buy the book, you can look up specific areas of dis-ease you may be experience, find the cause and speak directly to it. Sounds crazy, I know, but works.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Reality, NJ
Posts: 853
After being in a funk for a couple days yet again I need to be honest with myself. I realized today this is a pattern for me. I havent been making good decisions for myself at all. So I am not getting better. I am going round in a circle.
I let go of the new addict in my life (although in my head he was just for "fun")but when he was around..I wasnt get much sleep and was exhausted half the time. ( not a wise idea to let him in my life in the first place)
I thought if I started going out and meeting people it would make me feel better and it was a bandaid for a while but going to a bar..I always seem to drink too much. And when I drink too much on a Friday..I am crabby the rest of the weekend. Truth is I cant really drink. A glass of wine yes..8 beers for someone who never drank much in her life..My body cant handle it. So no more of that.
Then since I would be hungover from Friday I would be missing my Saturday Alanon group. And its my favorite one.
So ok. Enough acting like a college student who just got her freedom. I need to find a happy medium. I can make friends and have fun but focusing on my main responsibilties is more important.
In way I have been acting like my stbxah. I have been running away. So I will chalk this up to a lesson learned.
Next Friday I dont have work and I am going to the beach. BY MYSELF..with some good books and enjoy a day with me. Tonight I will take a bubble bath. And I will forgive myself for the bag of cookies I just ate as comfort food
Hugs
Lulu
I let go of the new addict in my life (although in my head he was just for "fun")but when he was around..I wasnt get much sleep and was exhausted half the time. ( not a wise idea to let him in my life in the first place)
I thought if I started going out and meeting people it would make me feel better and it was a bandaid for a while but going to a bar..I always seem to drink too much. And when I drink too much on a Friday..I am crabby the rest of the weekend. Truth is I cant really drink. A glass of wine yes..8 beers for someone who never drank much in her life..My body cant handle it. So no more of that.
Then since I would be hungover from Friday I would be missing my Saturday Alanon group. And its my favorite one.
So ok. Enough acting like a college student who just got her freedom. I need to find a happy medium. I can make friends and have fun but focusing on my main responsibilties is more important.
In way I have been acting like my stbxah. I have been running away. So I will chalk this up to a lesson learned.
Next Friday I dont have work and I am going to the beach. BY MYSELF..with some good books and enjoy a day with me. Tonight I will take a bubble bath. And I will forgive myself for the bag of cookies I just ate as comfort food
Hugs
Lulu
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
