Blame game example?
Member
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: minneapolis, mn
Posts: 2,762
great idea, tc.
i don't have any advice or words or consolation to add. just know that it really will get better, and well, if it's any help, even if she quit - putting down the bottle is just the first in a very long series of actions. it wouldn't mean that she would get a complete transplant of the ugly components of her personality.
hope church was fullfilling
i don't have any advice or words or consolation to add. just know that it really will get better, and well, if it's any help, even if she quit - putting down the bottle is just the first in a very long series of actions. it wouldn't mean that she would get a complete transplant of the ugly components of her personality.
hope church was fullfilling
Member
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Midwest
Posts: 545
Originally Posted by Jadmack25 
Weakness is not when you are open to other thoughts and ideas, recognising you need help and able to ask for it. That flyhigh, comes from true strength.
Weakness, is being AFRAID to open up, to see when help is needed, to ask for it.
Congratulations on your strength, and may it keep growing.
God bless
Weakness, is being AFRAID to open up, to see when help is needed, to ask for it.
Congratulations on your strength, and may it keep growing.
God bless
Member
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Midwest
Posts: 545
Originally Posted by tpen
Thanks everyone, I didn't want to post and look weak again. I feel better and know these feelings are normal. Please have patience with me as I grow loving myself.....for the first time in my life. I don't understand why this relationship occured as I always have felt God was walking with me the entire time.
I hope the wind dies down outside and I can regain a sense of peace.
I hope the wind dies down outside and I can regain a sense of peace.
I truly believed that my husband being an alcoholic/addict wasn't supposed to happen to me... but looking back.. I willfully ignored the red flags. BUT...My exah taught me things about myself that I probably would have never addressed on my own... I am a better person for having experienced this mess.... I never once felt that God abandoned me... during the process I did question (a lot) the why's....
Now I know many of the answers... and it's just as my tag line says...
"No man (person) can ever give you your self-worth, but you can let plenty of men rob you of it."
"Bad men (people) are spiritual graces sent in disguise to teach us, through torment, to love ourselves."
"Bad men (people) are spiritual graces sent in disguise to teach us, through torment, to love ourselves."
today4me
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 311
Good idea TakingCharge, here ya go.
Talent: singing!! Finally found the confidence in my voice at age 37.
Best moments: observing the peace, beauty and presence of the Lord at my Uncles burial in Arlington. He was a POW/MIA and remains were discovered in 2005. The emotion and amazing grace observed during the ceremony are still clearly memorized in my mind.
Favorite places: Lake Vermilion, Minnesota. It must have 100's of islands of pine trees and when the lake is calm is where I love to be.
Santa Claus toy: train with engine, boxcars and tracks.
Top 5 songs: 1) I Believe (Brooks & Dunn); 2) Dance with Wolves Theme Song; 3) Amazing Grace: 4) Seven Bridges Road (Eagles); 5) U2
Talent: singing!! Finally found the confidence in my voice at age 37.
Best moments: observing the peace, beauty and presence of the Lord at my Uncles burial in Arlington. He was a POW/MIA and remains were discovered in 2005. The emotion and amazing grace observed during the ceremony are still clearly memorized in my mind.
Favorite places: Lake Vermilion, Minnesota. It must have 100's of islands of pine trees and when the lake is calm is where I love to be.
Santa Claus toy: train with engine, boxcars and tracks.
Top 5 songs: 1) I Believe (Brooks & Dunn); 2) Dance with Wolves Theme Song; 3) Amazing Grace: 4) Seven Bridges Road (Eagles); 5) U2
today4me
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 311
Church was an impact as the sermon was focused on: James 1:2 – My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials,
Think that hit me hard enough? Oh yes indeed. So, I need to learn from this and love myself more is the message I am getting from this trial. Hard concept but it makes sense looking back at my relationships. I never put my foot down, just showed unconditional love as God would do. That is ok, but there is more to love than unconditional. Respect, honor, trust, patience, kindness, joy, etc. I could go on and on.
I never thought this post would get legs, just figured I had to vent. Thank you, and thank you.
Abide in the vine~
Think that hit me hard enough? Oh yes indeed. So, I need to learn from this and love myself more is the message I am getting from this trial. Hard concept but it makes sense looking back at my relationships. I never put my foot down, just showed unconditional love as God would do. That is ok, but there is more to love than unconditional. Respect, honor, trust, patience, kindness, joy, etc. I could go on and on.
I never thought this post would get legs, just figured I had to vent. Thank you, and thank you.
Abide in the vine~
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 394
I really feel for all the people on here who are having trouble keeping the no contact up. I guess I am really lucky, because I desperately cling to no contact like a life preserver. I will do anything I can to avoid contact with my ex. Remember this because many of you will be where I am one day soon.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 223
Originally Posted by tpen
Her reply....I need to be with someone who trusts me.
Originally Posted by tpen
Are you sure it isn’t more than twice…..oh you would definitely know the exact number and probably date.
And finally, a dig expressing contempt because you have normal interest and disapproval in your spouse's infidelities, and actually expect her to control herself.
She feels the life is being sucked out of her. Yep, it sure is--right into a bottle. Check in with her 10 years from now, if she's still alive, and see if she's not just a shell of what she is today.
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