He passed away the guilt is coming
Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Wizard Land Downunder
Posts: 2,615
My sincere sympathy to you and your children in this time of sadness and grief.
My XAH died last year, fortunately there was no trouble and I was asked for help in getting his eulogy accurate for our daughter to read.
Having to face inaccuracies in names etc, because of others too blind to the fact that you and your children have been an important part of his life, is very hard for you.
Forgive their denial and refusal to accept that his problem was a big one, and nothing you did either caused it or could stop it.
Alcoholism has a life of it's own, and like a cancer, it eats away the life of all around it.
I have you all in my prayers.
God bless
My XAH died last year, fortunately there was no trouble and I was asked for help in getting his eulogy accurate for our daughter to read.
Having to face inaccuracies in names etc, because of others too blind to the fact that you and your children have been an important part of his life, is very hard for you.
Forgive their denial and refusal to accept that his problem was a big one, and nothing you did either caused it or could stop it.
Alcoholism has a life of it's own, and like a cancer, it eats away the life of all around it.
I have you all in my prayers.
God bless
A jug fills drop by drop
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,784
Maybe bring dark glasses so no one can "read" your expression?
Please accept my condolences. Can you bring someone you trust 100% for extra support? I agree with the poster that says they are in their own denial and mourning, that does not excuse any behavior but it has helped me to disregard certain comments, when I remember the person is hurting and dealing with difficult stuff, and don't know better than projecting their pain in others.
Remember, remember it is about you and him and your children. People will think whatever, yet another thing NOT under our control. And we are all with you in spirit ((hugs))
Please accept my condolences. Can you bring someone you trust 100% for extra support? I agree with the poster that says they are in their own denial and mourning, that does not excuse any behavior but it has helped me to disregard certain comments, when I remember the person is hurting and dealing with difficult stuff, and don't know better than projecting their pain in others.
Remember, remember it is about you and him and your children. People will think whatever, yet another thing NOT under our control. And we are all with you in spirit ((hugs))
get it, give it, grow in it
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Calif coast
Posts: 3,167
You can't be made to feel unwelcome...You can't be made to feel anything you don't want to feel. They're not doing it to you...there just doing it (whatever behavior they are exhibiting ) because that is all they know.
If they knew better they would do better.
YoU go to the funeral for you and your kids. Make your peace with your ex and the situation that he came from. Be thankful you are more enlightened/
When we are wiser, we must act wiser...and disregard the rest.
If they knew better they would do better.
YoU go to the funeral for you and your kids. Make your peace with your ex and the situation that he came from. Be thankful you are more enlightened/
When we are wiser, we must act wiser...and disregard the rest.
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