Uncomfortable drinking
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Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Canada
Posts: 140
queen
I love that......put missing husbands on beer cans or perhaps Dead or sick husbands......lets put pictures of brocken families.
I hate the way alcohol is glamorized.....If ever I had a drink it was never Glamorious. It's as dangerous and toxic as any drug out there really.. It makes me so angry.
I love that......put missing husbands on beer cans or perhaps Dead or sick husbands......lets put pictures of brocken families.
I hate the way alcohol is glamorized.....If ever I had a drink it was never Glamorious. It's as dangerous and toxic as any drug out there really.. It makes me so angry.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: georgia
Posts: 531
Rainy,
I would respect my husbands request as well and if mine were in recovery, I wouldn't drink around him either....probably not at all. I can see your take and was there over the summer, but if he isn't going to work on himself, then I won't restrict myself from an occassional beer.
I hope that mine does get into recovery......maybe someday!
Blessings, Constant
I would respect my husbands request as well and if mine were in recovery, I wouldn't drink around him either....probably not at all. I can see your take and was there over the summer, but if he isn't going to work on himself, then I won't restrict myself from an occassional beer.
I hope that mine does get into recovery......maybe someday!
Blessings, Constant
Member
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Ljubljana, Slovenia
Posts: 26
What an interesting topic!
I generally don't drink because I don't like alcohol. I used to drink it when I was younger but it never did me any good. Then I started to hate it when I saw what it did to my mom and later my bf.
I am now trying to drink normally, which for me means a glass of good wine or champagne at weddings or special occasions. Not on an empty stomach though. And only if I feel like it not because I have to. I guess this is my way to make peace with alcohol and try to have a neutral attitde towards it and thus accept that alcohol is not bad but its abuse is.
I hope I made sense
Natasha
I generally don't drink because I don't like alcohol. I used to drink it when I was younger but it never did me any good. Then I started to hate it when I saw what it did to my mom and later my bf.
I am now trying to drink normally, which for me means a glass of good wine or champagne at weddings or special occasions. Not on an empty stomach though. And only if I feel like it not because I have to. I guess this is my way to make peace with alcohol and try to have a neutral attitde towards it and thus accept that alcohol is not bad but its abuse is.
I hope I made sense
Natasha
Member
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Washington
Posts: 129
Constant,
I hope your husband seeks recovery some day too, and big ((hugs)) to you for working on yours whether he does or not. this is a big step for all of us whether our partners are in recovery or actively using.
take care,
I hope your husband seeks recovery some day too, and big ((hugs)) to you for working on yours whether he does or not. this is a big step for all of us whether our partners are in recovery or actively using.
take care,
Guest
Posts: n/a
Hi all. Thanks for all your answers on this. I think there were a couple of you who understood what I was asking. My A has never tried to get sober. But in watching him drink himself to death (which he WILL if he dosent stop) just makes ME feel (from inside myself) that I am being hypicriticle when I drink because I see what it is doing to him, and I hate it. So If I drink too much or even BUY a bottle, I feel like I am being just like him! He has never asked me not to drink. Actually, he asks me TO drink with him! Most of the time I say no, but sometimes I go out with him. But not often. I hope that makes my question a little clearer! Thanks!
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Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Canada
Posts: 140
I recognize your situation so much
I know exactly what you mean.....I struggle with the same thing. It just doesn't seem right drinking around or with them.
sometimes I think to myself, I'm not an alcoholic.....I can allow myself to enjoy the odd glass of wine..or special occasion drink. I am able to stop at one....or two... That's the difference they usually can't. I recognize this......and most of the time it's a turn off for me....it makes you look at even consuming alcohol in a whole new light......I've gained a great respect for it.....it scares me. But yes it is a grey area.....forsure....
regards
sometimes I think to myself, I'm not an alcoholic.....I can allow myself to enjoy the odd glass of wine..or special occasion drink. I am able to stop at one....or two... That's the difference they usually can't. I recognize this......and most of the time it's a turn off for me....it makes you look at even consuming alcohol in a whole new light......I've gained a great respect for it.....it scares me. But yes it is a grey area.....forsure....
regards
No More Mrs. Nice Guy
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Iowa
Posts: 724
I enjoy a good glass of red wine from time to time. I can go out with friends and have a margarita! The difference is, alcohol is POISON to him and it's not to me. I see it like this: sometimes we sit in the smoking section in a restaurant as he likes to smoke.... it doesnt affect my decision of whether to smoke or not.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: georgia
Posts: 531
Osier....that is exactly the example that I was going to use....the smoking one.
I quit smoking in 98 after 19 years. It was VERY DIFFICULT, but I made it through. During that time my husband didn't quit or offer to quit or even try to NOT smoke around me, but I made it. If I would have wanted to smoke, I would have regardless of whether or not he was.
I think there is a fine line there.....if we have no control over them no matter what we do....then why would we think our decision about whether or not we have a beer would "change" anything? There is a difference in having a glass of wine or a margarita with the girls or a beer while you watch the football game.......it is NOT controlling us.....we are not rip-roaring drunk and treating others badly. If and when I choose to have anything, I make sure that I am being a "responsible" drinker. My husband sees that and KNOWS that I am not slamming beers.....we have discussed the fact that NO-ONE should have more than 2 or 3 EVER!
It is an individual issue....every relationship is different and they do change. I don't drink often, but I do believe that unless he asked me otherwise, I have the freedom to choose....
Debate on!!!
Blessings
Constant
I
I quit smoking in 98 after 19 years. It was VERY DIFFICULT, but I made it through. During that time my husband didn't quit or offer to quit or even try to NOT smoke around me, but I made it. If I would have wanted to smoke, I would have regardless of whether or not he was.
I think there is a fine line there.....if we have no control over them no matter what we do....then why would we think our decision about whether or not we have a beer would "change" anything? There is a difference in having a glass of wine or a margarita with the girls or a beer while you watch the football game.......it is NOT controlling us.....we are not rip-roaring drunk and treating others badly. If and when I choose to have anything, I make sure that I am being a "responsible" drinker. My husband sees that and KNOWS that I am not slamming beers.....we have discussed the fact that NO-ONE should have more than 2 or 3 EVER!
It is an individual issue....every relationship is different and they do change. I don't drink often, but I do believe that unless he asked me otherwise, I have the freedom to choose....
Debate on!!!
Blessings
Constant
I
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