mermaidgirl

I have popped in and out of the room here without posting. I have been gone-and working on things.

Here is the follow up to the email "relationship" my spouse found out about. It has been rocky. I have taken ownership and nothing else. I'm on a trip right now in another city, but my RAH's mind was churning and he blew a gasket over the phone the other day. He believes my "relationship" was planned all along (never mind his part in all of it); and "behavior repeats itself". Although my BP was up, the hackles on my neck were up-I didn't take the bait. He tried to re-write what actually took place and I wasn't going to buy it. I repeated what I had told him two months ago and repeatedly when his mind games get the best of him. Not ONCE did he say he understood why it all happened, like he had 2 months ago. NOT ONCE did he realize he was talking "crazy" (quacking??).

Then...hours later...he texts me with apologies-he was sorry he lost his temper, etc. I told him it's time for couples therapy. He wanted to wait and work on some things...but it's time. I don't want to rewrite my past here, but you can read it all in my old threads.

I am thankful today to be 2000 miles away from him in another city. I am thankful to be able to spend the afternoon with my son (who came with me), my cousin and his family. I am THANKFUL for having the strength for NOT taking the bait the other day. And, I am THANKFUL for not turning around and throwing things back at him-because I felt strong enough to protect myself and knew I didn't have to "get ugly" in order to accomplish this.

Taking a deep breath now and putting one foot in front of another...