Dealing with the A's fabrications that 3rd parties believe
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Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: where the streets have no name
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Dealing with the A's fabrications that 3rd parties believe
Anyone else been frustrated by hearing things form 3rd parties as a result of the alcoholic creating BS stories to shift blame?
I hear crap from 3rd parties based on the alcoholics family members with whom the DO NOT live with.
I realize it is futile trying to convince someone otherwise and also a tremendous waste of time and energy. So I have become much better at getting less upset in hearing these things.
The alcoholic creates any story one can imagine in order to shift blame and/or appear to not have a problem.
I hear crap from 3rd parties based on the alcoholics family members with whom the DO NOT live with.
I realize it is futile trying to convince someone otherwise and also a tremendous waste of time and energy. So I have become much better at getting less upset in hearing these things.
The alcoholic creates any story one can imagine in order to shift blame and/or appear to not have a problem.
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: The Swish Alps, SF CA
Posts: 2,144
“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”
Dr. Seuss
Not exactly spot on, but covers it enough for me.
It's none of my business what other people think of me, It's my business what I think of myself, easier said then done sometimes, especially when you do have someone "out there" (in more ways then one) smearing your name but at some point you just have to "shrug it off" and get on with the business of living your own life and stop giving sick people power over your life or airtime in your head.
Simple but not easy.
Dr. Seuss
Not exactly spot on, but covers it enough for me.
It's none of my business what other people think of me, It's my business what I think of myself, easier said then done sometimes, especially when you do have someone "out there" (in more ways then one) smearing your name but at some point you just have to "shrug it off" and get on with the business of living your own life and stop giving sick people power over your life or airtime in your head.
Simple but not easy.
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Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: FL
Posts: 14,246
I'm with denny about people who repeat things that I'm better off not hearing. I had to learn how to tactfully cut someone off before they could start to blather on. "I'd rather not hear about or discuss this." usually works; anyone who chooses to continue on after that is usually somebody I'm not going to have contact with.
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Stumbling toward happiness
Posts: 4,706
I can't tell you how many times I repeated this phrase to such people:
"There's not a shred of truth to what you've been told, and honestly I'm not interested in talking about it."
I too had to let a lot of people go who would judge me based on hearsay. Don't really need such people in my life, y'know?
Good luck, steve
"There's not a shred of truth to what you've been told, and honestly I'm not interested in talking about it."
I too had to let a lot of people go who would judge me based on hearsay. Don't really need such people in my life, y'know?
Good luck, steve
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