neecey1224

I have read some posts that have said, "once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic." Basically saying there is no hope of them ever changing. My question then is, what is the point of recovery? I have also read many posts written by RA's who stated when they were finally ready for recovery, that nothing could stand in their way. These RA's entered the recovery process and changed their own lives. That does not sound like "no hope" to me. I invite comments to provide clarity/insight into this contradiction.

Taking5

That does not mean we'll never change. Alcoholism is incurable, but can be arrested by not drinking. Similarly diabetes is not curable but proper diet, monitoring of blood sugar and use of insulin arrests the disease.

"Always an alcoholic" means we'll never be normal drinkers again. Testimony of people with years of sobriety who go back to drinking confirms this.

There is hope that the A in your life can "recover" as in stop drinking for good, but that doesn't mean that s/he will cease to be an alcoholic.

I hope that helps.

SelfSeeking

What dgillz says. This is why even people with 20+years of sobriety still say "my name is ___ and I"m an alcoholic" at AA meetings. They've changed their lives radically but reminding themselves that this does not mean they can drink like anyone else.

As long as there's life, there's hope

tennis71

Good question - I am in recovery and will always be an alcoholic. That just means that I have gotten to the point where I can never drink "normally" again, it does not mean that I can never change and stop drinking.

Recovery is a process, not an event. For most alcoholics it takes a lot of work to change their ways but it is possible if they want to change. For me, my best hope is to work the AA program and to stay spiritually fit.

I will die an alcoholic (hopefully after a long fulfilling life), however, I refuse to die a drunk!

It sounds like the other responses are along the same lines, I hope this helps to answer your questions.

Thanks for posting!

freshstart

IMO the term alcoholic or addict does not refer to who you are as a person nor what you can accomplish. It's simply speaking of the disease you suffer from. Yes, IMO i'm an addict. I'll always be an addict. All that means though is that I have an allergy to alcohol and drugs which makes it to where I can not ever put another one in my body. I simply can't. That doesn't mean that I can't go on to lead a very productive and happy life.

Kellye C

Dgillz said it perfectly. I know that for me I cannot drink. To drink is to die. I am an alcoholic and I will always be an alcoholic. That won't change. What has changed is me. My outlook on life, thought patterns, ways of dealing with others has changed as a result of working the 12 steps.

With regards to what I have in quotations, I don't think it's a contradiction but just indicative of how desperate the person is to change and get free of the bondage of alcohol. When I came to AA a little over 4 years ago, I came out of a sense of desperation and also as the result of a one person intervention my mom gave me. I had tried everything I could think of to control my drinking or at least trying to get it to the point where I wouldn't have such horrible withdrawals. Nothing I tried worked and I saw my organs beginning to give out. Even with that knowledge I still couldn't stop. So I was hopeless.

I found hope again in AA as members shared their stories. I was able to relate to at least some aspects of each of them. They had found a way out and were enjoying life and I wanted that too. I became willing to do anything and everything to achieve it. Once I got through the withdrawals and the fog cleared I felt better and began to work the steps, I started feeling better on the outside and on the inside. I got in the habit of attending meetings daily and I quickly got to where I couldn't wait until meeting time. I was told sobriety and recovery must be my #1 priority and if I didn't put it first I wouldn't have to worry about anything else because either I would lose it or I would die. Pretty motivating wouldn't you say?

These are just my experiences but I hope they might help!
Kellye

Kellye C

One more thought (oh how I miss the edit button lol!). I said that I came to AA as the result of an intervention by my mom. I want to clarify that it wasn't the first time she had done this and before I would go to a couple of meetings looking for some reason why it wasn't the place for me. I basically did it to get her off my back. I rationalized and justified my actions right up to the liquor store door. What was different the last time was that she caught me as I was coming out of a 3 day blackout and totally miserable. Her words and my desperation worked in conjunction to get me in a meeting that night. Bottom line is that nothing anyone did or said was going to get me sober. It would make me mad, make me feel guilty and then make me sneakier and more isolated. I had to reach the jumping off point where I could no longer imagine my life with alcohol or without it and I had to want to quit MORE than I wanted to drink. Until then anyone's efforts were futile.

I felt it important to include this explanation and insight about my circumstance lest someone misconstrue what I'm saying and get false hope.

I am a codie and was one long before I became an alcoholic and I have had my round of trying to deal with a now ex-AH and his drinking (this actually led to my drinking - frustration because I couldn't control his.) Very quickly I went from someone who rarely drank to drinking him under the table. Thus began my 3.5 year decent into hell.

So I have been there and didn't want anyone thinking my mother alone is what made me stop. Had that been the case I would have stopped much sooner.

Ok, sorry for the book but I really felt it was important to qualify my statement.

Stubborn1

Some think that you are predisposed to the addiction through genes as well. I worry about my son. Since his father is an active alcoholic he has a good chance of becoming one. All I can do is educate him.
You can be a recovering alcoholic. But an alcoholic just the same. You don't have to go around announcing it. There is hope. Some by the grace of God get sober and stay sober.
It takes hard work to get sober but it's worth it. The one's who are sober I have admiration for. They are a gift.