atalose

History doesn't repeat itself people repeat history. It appears he has spent the greater part of his life drunk rather then sober.

You happen to have come into his life on one of his rare sober times.

He doesn't seem to think or feel the sober person is great or worthy other wise that sober person would have stuck around more.

His family and friends know him best, know his history and it's a very good chance that he will continue to repeat his history.

Only you can make the right choice for yourself with this situation.

havingnepiphany

Yeah, you're right. I hate the thought of not being supportive. I feel like Im throwing away someone who brought alot of good into my life at one time. I know, I know - he had no problem doing throwing me away. But, Im better than that, I wouldnt do that to someone.
I feel like Im giving up. He meant alot to me.
I think alcohol is the worst thing I have ever seen. I never knew anything so messed up, hateful and evil in my life.
I hope you all will find peace and happiness in your lives. No one- not the alcoholic, or anyone else, should have to go through this, ever.
Thanks for beating it into me, everyone. No more posts from me, new quarter of school starts in the morning!

havingnepiphany

Ok, and 1 more response...I've looked around at other posts from other people, yet same story. It seems most people here will give their story, looking for and getting sympathy, then criticize others for their similar situations. More insanity related to alcohol? Im not one of the "poor-me's-Im-stuck" looking for sympathy or critisizm. I've read pretty much the same stories as mine. Altho Im not married to this man, dont have kids by him, I have to ask the question "why would you marry or have children with someone like this, then expect sympathy from others and talk down to others in the same situation as yours?" I DID walk out. I AM taking care of myself, others and moving ahead with my life without excuses of why I have to allow someone to drag me down their destuctive path. I got a small taste of it and walked away. I can try to be forgiving if I think it was earned. I can distance myself, set bounderies and not become bitter or hateful. I've done it before. He is in recovery miles away. The question was - "Do I trust him again?". I tried to emhasize the fact that there was no relationship at this time, nothing keeping me in one. And there were kids involved that I loved dearly. There were years of family holidays, school assemblies, elderly parents with high hopes, it doesnt hurt any less Im sure. I dont think it deserves less credit, either. It was about being supportive to someone who was making an attempt at having their life back. Would I ever really trust him again? Probably not. So what chance would there be of a relationship? My duty to myself is to become stronger from this, not roll around in someone elses mess. By being supportive at a distance of someone that caused me great turmoil, maybe the possibility of being a more forgiving, understanding person is what will get me through the hatered that I felt. I can move on, as long as my defense is up and dont allow someone to cross those bounderies, then look for sympathy when Im covered in mess.

TooMuch4TooLong

I'm not sure who you think is rolling around in a mess. I walked and did not look back. I won't buy into "he is trying to better himself" "I need to be supportive of this human being". One he is not a human being, he is a human falling. You want to stick around for it great, let me know how that works out for you. I have yet to see anyone wanting pity on this board but you. You want to justify your actions please feel free to do so but not at the expense of those that are trying to move on with their lives. Go on and take care of his family and him. You slept in the bed eventually you are the one who will have to make it.