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I was just reading another thread about...

Old 09-10-2008, 12:51 PM
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I was just reading another thread about...

ocoa. Is it possible for me to have ocoa, but not have an alcoholic parent???

My mom's dad was an A, and out of 11 kids atleast 8 of them became an A. My mom didnt though.

I do see the opposite of my mom, she is a codie. I think living with the alcoholic parent, she learned the behaviors of a co-dependent.

According to my mom, my dad was abusive with her physically, and I do remember fighting all the time, name calling, feeling nervous, feeling the need to please and to be recognized. I dont even like thinking about it.

I just read the characteristics of ocoa and wow!!!!

I wonder why not one of the counselors ever suggested this.

Reading the characteristics, has made me want to learn more about what ocoa is. Is there a difference between ocoa and co-dependent? It seems like alot of the traits are the same.

Wow, digging in my closet is pretty scary, but digging in it is the only way to start cleaning it out. I am going to start on a cleaning spree with atleast this one area of the closet. I want to see more results of this messy closet

Thank you splendra reading your post inspired me to read what ocoa is.
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Old 09-10-2008, 12:58 PM
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Yep. Neither of my parents were/are alcoholics, but they certainly brought a lot of the dysfunctional behaviors/attitudes into their own lives. Both of my paternal grandparents were severe alcoholics and died before I was ever born. My mother also had an alcoholic brother who's now dead due to a horrible alcohol-related car accident.
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Old 09-10-2008, 01:43 PM
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I have refered to myself as second generation ACOA, 2 of my grandparents one on each side were A's we didn't see much of them, but I have alot of ACOA issues too. It gets passed down through the generations, both my parents did not deal with their ACOA issues or their codependant issues, so I do believe I have been taught them.

Is codependancy and ACOA one and the same for second generation or third? Quite possibly

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