Beer or Hard Liquor?
Recovering Nicely
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 935
Beer or Hard Liquor?
Hi All,
I was talking with my sister this weekend and she was saying how strange it is that my AH seems obsessed with beer. She's puzzled that since he is an alcoholic, he won't drink anything other than beer and it has to be Budweiser. It seems to me that most ordinary people (not the ones who walk in our shoes) seem to have the "it's only beer" attitude. And it also seems most of you on SR Friends and Family mention your A and his alcohol of choice - beer (second choice seems to be vodka). So out of curiosity, I'm doing a quick poll - beer or liquor? Thanks for taking the time out to answer.
I was talking with my sister this weekend and she was saying how strange it is that my AH seems obsessed with beer. She's puzzled that since he is an alcoholic, he won't drink anything other than beer and it has to be Budweiser. It seems to me that most ordinary people (not the ones who walk in our shoes) seem to have the "it's only beer" attitude. And it also seems most of you on SR Friends and Family mention your A and his alcohol of choice - beer (second choice seems to be vodka). So out of curiosity, I'm doing a quick poll - beer or liquor? Thanks for taking the time out to answer.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Tomah, WI
Posts: 52
on this topic... mine would drink beer (what ever he could get cheap)... but if he was wanting to hide that he was drinking he would drink vodka as well.... but they don't understand that we can tell by their actions... so why hide it....
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: "Somewhere in Ohio" ... little joke from past
Posts: 481
Queen don't worry about being curious. Your question is a valid one and it's crossed my mind more than a couple times too. To answer your poll, R drinks Bud Light on a daily basis, and 20-25. Sometimes he'll add Black & Tan to the mix, and on vacation, will add a bottle of wine at dinner. But mainly he's a Bud Light man.
As for your observation "it's only beer" I've heard that my own self. I'd tell people "he's drinking 25 beers a day!" and they'd say "it's only beer" and I thought "well h*ll, isn't it still alcohol?" Maybe the A rationalizes it that way too. Doesn't beer still cause cirrhosis, heart failure and brain damage the same as any other alcohol? Sure it does. It seems like a shell game to me. JMHO.
As for your observation "it's only beer" I've heard that my own self. I'd tell people "he's drinking 25 beers a day!" and they'd say "it's only beer" and I thought "well h*ll, isn't it still alcohol?" Maybe the A rationalizes it that way too. Doesn't beer still cause cirrhosis, heart failure and brain damage the same as any other alcohol? Sure it does. It seems like a shell game to me. JMHO.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
Originally Posted by anvilhead 
rather an odd question......what's the point? does it matter what color the bullets are in the gun, once ya pull the trigger? i gently suggest this is maybe a bit too wrapped up in what the addict's doing.............
What I got from this post is that there are myths surrounding alcholism. Some people think that alcoholics are only alcoholics if they drink hard liquor. And lots of it. I think this is a great opportunity to say that a person can drink beer and be an alcoholic. A person can drink wine and be an alcoholic. A person can drink liquor and be an alcoholic. Busting the myth that "it's only beer" and therefore it is harmless seems important to me.
It doesn't mean that everyone who drinks is an alcoholic. It just means that
alcoholism is alcoholism regardless of the color of the "bullets". And just because someone owns a gun, it doesn't mean that they are going to shoot themselves in the foot.
Did that make any sense at all?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 477
I think many of the people who say "it's just beer" might have a small drinking problem themselves or they don't understand the alcohol equivalency charts. You can drink more beer and more wine at a sitting than you can hard liquor but the end result is going to be the same if you start going over the recommended limit.
XABF would drink ANYthing if his liquor of choice wasn't available including cheap undrinkable wine that I was set to pour down the drain.
I don't really wonder about his alcohol consumption any longer but his disease has most certainly influenced how I now react to situations in which any alcohol is being consumed in excess. I simply no longer wish to be around people who drink to excess....they spout rubbish and they smell bad.
And speaking of smelling bad. Why do many As, it seems, drink vodka thinking that it doesn't "smell up" on them? I can smell it!
ARL
XABF would drink ANYthing if his liquor of choice wasn't available including cheap undrinkable wine that I was set to pour down the drain.
I don't really wonder about his alcohol consumption any longer but his disease has most certainly influenced how I now react to situations in which any alcohol is being consumed in excess. I simply no longer wish to be around people who drink to excess....they spout rubbish and they smell bad.
And speaking of smelling bad. Why do many As, it seems, drink vodka thinking that it doesn't "smell up" on them? I can smell it!
ARL
Forum Leader
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Scottsdale, AZ, one big happy dysfunctional family!
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I love your posts QT! They make me think about where I never want to be again.
Mmmmmm beeeeeeeeeerrrrr!! I took my first sip at around age 14. Mom and Dad always had an open beer and they'd let me take a drink, then when they left the room I'd drink more. I loved the taste of it from the very start.
When I turned 19 I thought it was cool to drink White Russians and Miller Lites, a two-fisted drinker!
Then I became a connosieur of micro-brews and craft beers. Even started brewing my own which was a total joke because I could drink it faster than I could brew it.
Then it became about quantity, not quality. Schlitz or any other cheap beer was fine. I didn't care how it tasted as long as it numbed me.
But here's the reality- Towards my end the beer stopped working. I could drink a case and still not feel deadened enough so I supplemented the beer with liquor. Vodka, bourbon, scotch, rum, whatever. The cheap stuff was OK, I was drinking alone so who cared what I drank? I drank anything I could get my hands on cheaply and easily.
Something I've shared a few times- The last day I drank I was down to a bottle of dry vermouth, and the only thing I had to mix it with so I could choke it down was lemonade. And that worked just fine too.
Mmmmmm beeeeeeeeeerrrrr!! I took my first sip at around age 14. Mom and Dad always had an open beer and they'd let me take a drink, then when they left the room I'd drink more. I loved the taste of it from the very start.
When I turned 19 I thought it was cool to drink White Russians and Miller Lites, a two-fisted drinker!
Then I became a connosieur of micro-brews and craft beers. Even started brewing my own which was a total joke because I could drink it faster than I could brew it.
Then it became about quantity, not quality. Schlitz or any other cheap beer was fine. I didn't care how it tasted as long as it numbed me.
But here's the reality- Towards my end the beer stopped working. I could drink a case and still not feel deadened enough so I supplemented the beer with liquor. Vodka, bourbon, scotch, rum, whatever. The cheap stuff was OK, I was drinking alone so who cared what I drank? I drank anything I could get my hands on cheaply and easily.
Something I've shared a few times- The last day I drank I was down to a bottle of dry vermouth, and the only thing I had to mix it with so I could choke it down was lemonade. And that worked just fine too.
Its_me_jen
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
I drank beer ............ or whatever else was in front of me. But beer mostly.
My mom drank vodka because 1) she didn't like beer 2) she thought no one would smell it. I tried to explain to her that if you drank that much of any alcohol you'd smell like a brewery no matter what.
The "it's only beer" thing......yep. I decided at one point that I didn't actually have a problem, it was the beer so I switched to only the hard stuff. It didn't work.
My mom drank vodka because 1) she didn't like beer 2) she thought no one would smell it. I tried to explain to her that if you drank that much of any alcohol you'd smell like a brewery no matter what.
The "it's only beer" thing......yep. I decided at one point that I didn't actually have a problem, it was the beer so I switched to only the hard stuff. It didn't work.
Another Day in Paradise
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Upland, CA
Posts: 900
I took great pride, one more example of how confused I was when I walked into AA, that I drank Canadian Club and Single Malt scotchs right to the bitter end.
Imagine my shock when I discovered that myself and the Mad Dog 20-20 guy next to me had all the same problems!! I was just a garden variety drunk. As the old saying goes, "MY FAVORITE DRINK WAS THE NEXT ONE!"
Jon
Imagine my shock when I discovered that myself and the Mad Dog 20-20 guy next to me had all the same problems!! I was just a garden variety drunk. As the old saying goes, "MY FAVORITE DRINK WAS THE NEXT ONE!"
Jon
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Scottsdale, AZ, one big happy dysfunctional family!
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Originally Posted by merlotmamma
My mother only drank wine and beer. It was enough to kill her.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 1,358
My now ex's first choice was vodka (I could smell it too)! Tequila was second choice and beer was third. And some nights, all three!
When nothing was left, mouthwash seemed to do in a pinch. And I used to think he was concerned about oral hygiene for my sake, LOL! Did I have a lot to learn!
When nothing was left, mouthwash seemed to do in a pinch. And I used to think he was concerned about oral hygiene for my sake, LOL! Did I have a lot to learn!
Forum Leader
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Scottsdale, AZ, one big happy dysfunctional family!
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Originally Posted by PaperDolls
My mom drank vodka because 1) she didn't like beer 2) she thought no one would smell it.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 183
My husband and I have been together forever (or so it seems). In the early days it was beer, and I too thought, "Eh, it's just beer." He'd drink a six pack almost every night.
It's funny (not) but even today he's a beer snob. He'd never drink Bud, but give him Sam Adams or Guiness and he's a happy man. I think he thinks it is ok as long as he doesn't drink crappy beer; HOWEVER, when he thinks he's hiding his drinking he drinks the crappiest vodka out there (Gibleys, I think) because it is cheap and he thinks I won't notice either the money being spent or the vodka on his breath.
It's funny (not) but even today he's a beer snob. He'd never drink Bud, but give him Sam Adams or Guiness and he's a happy man. I think he thinks it is ok as long as he doesn't drink crappy beer; HOWEVER, when he thinks he's hiding his drinking he drinks the crappiest vodka out there (Gibleys, I think) because it is cheap and he thinks I won't notice either the money being spent or the vodka on his breath.
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