"I screamed. I cried. I said hurtful things. I feel great."
Doormat
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mahwah, NJ
Posts: 19
"I screamed. I cried. I said hurtful things. I feel great."
ddly, I feel great. I know i definitely wont be able to sleep tonight but I feel wonderful. I was the angriest I've ever been in my entire life. So angry that I was shaking. I screamed. I cried. I said hurtful things and I feel great.
I went back and demanded him to come and talk to me. I've never done anything like that in my life. normally I would go home and get so angry I'd be sick and I'd think and think and think all night long and wake up angrier than the night before. But tonight, something wonderful happened and I acted on impulse. I turned the car around and went back, called her and demanded to speak to him. I parked my car a street over and walked to his house to calm myself down. I made him meet me outside and I said everything on my mind. (I didnt even want to talk about this **** tonight. or really this entire weekend. Im not really ready for the conversation. but this lie and this wasted night. well it set me off.) I told him how I feel half the time. I told him how I feel the other half of the time. I cried.
Afterwards, I was a little shaken up. The car ride home was silent and my head full of thoughts but as soon as I got home, I felt fantastic. I was smiling. I finally did what I wanted to do and said what I wanted to say exactly WHEN I wanted to say it. I let the wall down ( the one that protects me from what other people think of me. the one that i keep up ALL the time.) i didnt care what the neighbors thought, I didnt care what his parents thought, i didnt care what he thought of me. i did what i had to do and didnt care how crazy or stupid or ridiculous i looked doing it.
This past month, I ve been desperately trying to take care of myself. Im exercising before bed, walking in the morning, eating healthy and not late at night. Im remembering to take vitamins. Im brushing my hair everyday. Im actually happy. Im accepting myself for who I am and Im starting to like the person. But tonight, for a brief second, I felt like the tiny person that HE made me be yet again. Then suddenly, I snapped out of it. I was only in the bad place for an hour and then I was on top of the world.
Im so proud of myself for turning the car around. Im so proud that I got the guts to call her and Im so so proud of taking the time to walk there and calm down a little before exploding. I feel good.
I went back and demanded him to come and talk to me. I've never done anything like that in my life. normally I would go home and get so angry I'd be sick and I'd think and think and think all night long and wake up angrier than the night before. But tonight, something wonderful happened and I acted on impulse. I turned the car around and went back, called her and demanded to speak to him. I parked my car a street over and walked to his house to calm myself down. I made him meet me outside and I said everything on my mind. (I didnt even want to talk about this **** tonight. or really this entire weekend. Im not really ready for the conversation. but this lie and this wasted night. well it set me off.) I told him how I feel half the time. I told him how I feel the other half of the time. I cried.
Afterwards, I was a little shaken up. The car ride home was silent and my head full of thoughts but as soon as I got home, I felt fantastic. I was smiling. I finally did what I wanted to do and said what I wanted to say exactly WHEN I wanted to say it. I let the wall down ( the one that protects me from what other people think of me. the one that i keep up ALL the time.) i didnt care what the neighbors thought, I didnt care what his parents thought, i didnt care what he thought of me. i did what i had to do and didnt care how crazy or stupid or ridiculous i looked doing it.
This past month, I ve been desperately trying to take care of myself. Im exercising before bed, walking in the morning, eating healthy and not late at night. Im remembering to take vitamins. Im brushing my hair everyday. Im actually happy. Im accepting myself for who I am and Im starting to like the person. But tonight, for a brief second, I felt like the tiny person that HE made me be yet again. Then suddenly, I snapped out of it. I was only in the bad place for an hour and then I was on top of the world.
Im so proud of myself for turning the car around. Im so proud that I got the guts to call her and Im so so proud of taking the time to walk there and calm down a little before exploding. I feel good.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: "Somewhere in Ohio" ... little joke from past
Posts: 481
11 years ago I was calm ... too calm ... about the end of my 10 year marriage. My XH was running around with a person we both worked with and he had claimed said "there's nothing going on." He was living in my basement, separated, but not separated (if that makes sense). So one night when I knew they were somewhere together, I went on a little drive. I saw his car at a local hotel but way out in the lot so it didn't seem like they were there. I parked about three rows back. Sure enough it wasn't long before they both came along, her driving the car, and before he got out, there was a pretty good kiss that went on. Nothing going on, huh? Before he got out, I pulled that passenger door open and I cannot even remember what all I said to the two of them. He drove home ahead of me, and I gave him about an hour of my mind, which was full of a lot of things. He just sat there, quietly, head down.
Once that night and explosive rant was over, so was everything inside me. No anger, no resentment, no bitterness, nothing. Just peace. Now I did a lot of stupid stuff after that working on building ME, but I never gave him a thought after that.
Brilliant, I'm glad you got it out. Now be done with it, never look back, never forget so you get in that situation again, and work on YOU!
Once that night and explosive rant was over, so was everything inside me. No anger, no resentment, no bitterness, nothing. Just peace. Now I did a lot of stupid stuff after that working on building ME, but I never gave him a thought after that.
Brilliant, I'm glad you got it out. Now be done with it, never look back, never forget so you get in that situation again, and work on YOU!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Stumbling toward happiness
Posts: 4,706
There's a great physical release in letting one's rage and sadness fly, rather than keeping it cooped up. I think it's a biochemical thing. It's healing and helpful when you don't attach outcomes to it (i.e. if I yell, he'll respond the right way)
I'm so glad you are taking care of your "machine" (your body) because the rest will follow. Brilliant, you're doing great.
GL
I'm so glad you are taking care of your "machine" (your body) because the rest will follow. Brilliant, you're doing great.
GL
Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 35
I just did the same thing...
My x(as of now)RABF dumped me last Sunday. Well... I dumped him. I told him to get out of my house. And he did not come back.
See, he is now in recovery. Sober for almost 5 months now. And I guess that now, I don't fit with his new lifestyle. The fact that I was there for over 4 years doesn't seem to do for nothing. Everything went well in these first few months, mostly because I have kept my mouth shut, I guess. Walking over my feelings to acknowledge his. A BIG loss of sexual interest from his part, to the point I have felt like brother and sister. When we used to have wiiiiiild sex.
Last Sunday, I lost it. He learned in rehab about boundaries (which I have to say I forgot about mine these last few years...). And he is applying them to me. Very much. We were doing dishes, I left my place, I came back, he was there. I put my hand on his hip, applied a little pressure. Like I would do to anybody else. He got all offended. Told me I was pushing him, putting him aside!!!! All the time, looking at me like I was a stranger. Somebody he never saw in his life. That is when I lost it.
I have called his phone twice today to let him know how I feel. I know it is nothing to him. But for me, for now, it makes me feel good that I could tell him (on the voice mail, without interruption) what I really really thought about hmn.
Now... I will go on with my life. I think I had some sort of closure.
See, he is now in recovery. Sober for almost 5 months now. And I guess that now, I don't fit with his new lifestyle. The fact that I was there for over 4 years doesn't seem to do for nothing. Everything went well in these first few months, mostly because I have kept my mouth shut, I guess. Walking over my feelings to acknowledge his. A BIG loss of sexual interest from his part, to the point I have felt like brother and sister. When we used to have wiiiiiild sex.
Last Sunday, I lost it. He learned in rehab about boundaries (which I have to say I forgot about mine these last few years...). And he is applying them to me. Very much. We were doing dishes, I left my place, I came back, he was there. I put my hand on his hip, applied a little pressure. Like I would do to anybody else. He got all offended. Told me I was pushing him, putting him aside!!!! All the time, looking at me like I was a stranger. Somebody he never saw in his life. That is when I lost it.
I have called his phone twice today to let him know how I feel. I know it is nothing to him. But for me, for now, it makes me feel good that I could tell him (on the voice mail, without interruption) what I really really thought about hmn.
Now... I will go on with my life. I think I had some sort of closure.
Wipe your paws elsewhere!
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 3,672
On many occassions, I said hurtful things to Richard. But once my anger subsided, my words always came back to haunt me. I became filled with remorse and shame over my behavior and always ended up apologizing to him to ease my guilty conscience. I hated the woman that I had become. She was mean, petty, controlling, angry, and vengeful. Like the alcoholic in my life, I had become a mere shadow of my former self. When I looked in the mirror, all I saw was ugliness. The woman I once was had all but disappeared.
The more I began to hate myself and my actions, the more unacceptable behavior I accepted from my boyfriend. I didn't think I deserved a better life. I didn't think I deserved better treatment. I didn't think anybody else would want me. So I stayed stuck in a miserable relationship for 25 years. And I blamed my self-hatred, self-doubt, loneliness, misery, and pain on Richard. He was no more responsible for my behavior than I was for his.
Hateful words made me feel momentarily better in the heat of an argument, but the only thing they accomplished was to make me hate myself more. Richard died of alcoholism five months ago. There is no opportunity for me to make amends for all the hateful things I said and did to him now. There are so many words I wish I hadn't said and so many things I wish I hadn't done. Once spoken, angry words can never be undone.
All the terrible things that Richard did and said to me were done under the influence of a powerful, mind-altering substance. What was my excuse?
The more I began to hate myself and my actions, the more unacceptable behavior I accepted from my boyfriend. I didn't think I deserved a better life. I didn't think I deserved better treatment. I didn't think anybody else would want me. So I stayed stuck in a miserable relationship for 25 years. And I blamed my self-hatred, self-doubt, loneliness, misery, and pain on Richard. He was no more responsible for my behavior than I was for his.
Hateful words made me feel momentarily better in the heat of an argument, but the only thing they accomplished was to make me hate myself more. Richard died of alcoholism five months ago. There is no opportunity for me to make amends for all the hateful things I said and did to him now. There are so many words I wish I hadn't said and so many things I wish I hadn't done. Once spoken, angry words can never be undone.
All the terrible things that Richard did and said to me were done under the influence of a powerful, mind-altering substance. What was my excuse?
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Stumbling toward happiness
Posts: 4,706
Depends, I suppose, on whether the "hurtful things" are true or not.
In my case, they were just the explosive release of some long-pent-up truths: "You are a cheater, a liar, and a self-centered monster, and I have no interest in being around you ever again." Suddenly the forever diplomatic, forever supportive, forever understanding spouse became a raving maniac for a while. But note that it WASN'T "You're an a$$hole, a worthless person, and you'll never amount to anything, and and and".
I suppose I could've said instead "...you have chosen at times to be unfaithful, you have lied to me on occasion, and you seem to put your own self-interest first even when it's extremely damaging to others, and I would prefer that....." That would've been nice and non-judgemental and accurate.
I do not regret my anger, personally. It was only anger, not hatred. He isn't scarred for life because of it. He just found an easier mark, someone who wouldn't challenge him.
It's all in your perspective I guess...all of our circumstances are different. I'm sorry you carry this pain around in your heart, FD. It must be a terrible weight at times. But our alcoholics choose to take this mind-altering substance and (in many cases) choose not to get help, do they not?. Should we absolve them of their terrible actions because of it? You yourself have stated before that we should not.
One of their consequences is that they have the potential to drive us to anger -- anger that can come out as an outburst, as retaliation, or as storming out of the relationship. That is one of the many risks they take, in my humble opinion. It's not something we should necessarily be proud of, but we are, after all, only human.
In my case, they were just the explosive release of some long-pent-up truths: "You are a cheater, a liar, and a self-centered monster, and I have no interest in being around you ever again." Suddenly the forever diplomatic, forever supportive, forever understanding spouse became a raving maniac for a while. But note that it WASN'T "You're an a$$hole, a worthless person, and you'll never amount to anything, and and and".
I suppose I could've said instead "...you have chosen at times to be unfaithful, you have lied to me on occasion, and you seem to put your own self-interest first even when it's extremely damaging to others, and I would prefer that....." That would've been nice and non-judgemental and accurate.
I do not regret my anger, personally. It was only anger, not hatred. He isn't scarred for life because of it. He just found an easier mark, someone who wouldn't challenge him.
It's all in your perspective I guess...all of our circumstances are different. I'm sorry you carry this pain around in your heart, FD. It must be a terrible weight at times. But our alcoholics choose to take this mind-altering substance and (in many cases) choose not to get help, do they not?. Should we absolve them of their terrible actions because of it? You yourself have stated before that we should not.
One of their consequences is that they have the potential to drive us to anger -- anger that can come out as an outburst, as retaliation, or as storming out of the relationship. That is one of the many risks they take, in my humble opinion. It's not something we should necessarily be proud of, but we are, after all, only human.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: in the present moment
Posts: 2,060
after reading all these different posts, i am feeling sad.
yes, explosive anger can hurt someone deeply. it can hurt you.
here are two wise sayings about angry actions:
1. "anger is like a corrosive substance...it destroys the vessel it is contained in."
and
2."anger is like a hot ember. when you hurl it at someone else it loses its power to burn them, but you end up burning yourself in the process."
Nowhere in these sayings does it indicate that ripping into someone with my justifiable anger is the way to growth, happiness or healing.
I am learning that if I am angry, disturbed or upset, its an inside job. Nobody MAKES me feel any certain way that i don't already have going on inside of me. I need to own my own responses to behaviour from others instead of acting superior and full of condemnation, or to rationalize my own unacceptably abusive words by saying that "he" drove me to it.
I have learned to make "I" statements rather than "you" statements.
Now, THAT makes me feel great.
An ending like this one for you could be an opportunity to go deeper inside yourself, and this may be the begiinning of recovery from painful relationships and a journey into wonderful self discovery.
yes, explosive anger can hurt someone deeply. it can hurt you.
here are two wise sayings about angry actions:
1. "anger is like a corrosive substance...it destroys the vessel it is contained in."
and
2."anger is like a hot ember. when you hurl it at someone else it loses its power to burn them, but you end up burning yourself in the process."
Nowhere in these sayings does it indicate that ripping into someone with my justifiable anger is the way to growth, happiness or healing.
I am learning that if I am angry, disturbed or upset, its an inside job. Nobody MAKES me feel any certain way that i don't already have going on inside of me. I need to own my own responses to behaviour from others instead of acting superior and full of condemnation, or to rationalize my own unacceptably abusive words by saying that "he" drove me to it.
I have learned to make "I" statements rather than "you" statements.
Now, THAT makes me feel great.
An ending like this one for you could be an opportunity to go deeper inside yourself, and this may be the begiinning of recovery from painful relationships and a journey into wonderful self discovery.
Power is not having to respond
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Wabbit Hole
Posts: 1,923
It's a start! Wasn't it Waylon jennings who sang "Im sick and tired of waking up sick and tired"?
I guess a hissy fit can be it's own catharsis.
Keep standing up for yourself and don't allow yourself to be used, manipulated and abused any more.
And, if you can, get into alanon.
I guess a hissy fit can be it's own catharsis.
Keep standing up for yourself and don't allow yourself to be used, manipulated and abused any more.
And, if you can, get into alanon.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 1,358
I verbally exploded at my ‘now ex’ twice in our relationship. I said very hurtful things to him both times. I called him a cheater (and he was), a liar (and he was), emotionally and verbally crude and cruel (and he was), and physically abusive (and he was). Nothing I said to him wasn’t true, and all the above actions would make almost anyone justifiably angry, IMO. Of course I was not in a library when I said these things to him, so yeah, I was loud about it.
His role in this was his above referenced actions, and I don’t care to make his alcohol consumption his excuse for poor behavior. It’s who he is as a person! My role in this was accepting his behavior from the very first moment he treated me that way. That’s who ‘I was’ as a person. And I don’t care to make my past teachings the reason for putting up with so much from him. His alcohol consumption, and my reasons for ‘accepting the unacceptable’ are excuses, again, IMO.
The first time I expressed my anger to him, I regretted it, but for the wrong reasons. Based on how violently both he and my Dad had expressed anger (verbally vicious, and physically out of control), I was afraid that that’s what people do when they become angry and I didn’t want to be that way. I didn’t understand that not all people who express anger become verbally or physically abusive.
The second time I verbally exploded at my ex was ‘the last time’. In my particular case, it was very dangerous for me to do that. I certainly wouldn’t suggest anyone do what I did if in a similar position as I was once in. Looking back, I cringe as I can see the potential for things turning out much worse than they actually did.
But, when I view things as they ‘actually unfolded‘ (my HP was watching out for me for sure that night), it was the BEST thing I could have done for myself. I had taken all I could take from him and let him know that in ‘no uncertain terms’. It was my declaration of independence! It was the first day of the rest of my life. Expressing my anger was my catalyst to change!
It was also our very last conversation, and, the last night of our relationship. Looking back, sure, I would have preferred to have a more civil ending…but being ‘civil‘ didn‘t work with my dealings with him before. Standing up for myself , expressing my anger, no longer ‘accepting the unacceptable’ and taking the necessary steps to end the relationship by taking long over-due appropriate action, did!
Currently, I don’t want to be in a position where I feel, or need to express anger everyday. That would be a signal that emotions have piled up because I haven’t dealt with issues effectively. And, I wouldn’t want to take out my frustrations on someone ‘just for the sake of release’ at someone else’s expense.
But, having said that, I also now believe that expressing anger when someone’s actions/words have harmed or disrespected me ‘can’ be healthy, as in a potential catalyst to problem resolution/change. I would however, want to ensure that boundaries/rules are in place and adhered to (i.e., no name calling, no throwing things, no disrespectful words being used, a time-limit for the vent, etc.).
His role in this was his above referenced actions, and I don’t care to make his alcohol consumption his excuse for poor behavior. It’s who he is as a person! My role in this was accepting his behavior from the very first moment he treated me that way. That’s who ‘I was’ as a person. And I don’t care to make my past teachings the reason for putting up with so much from him. His alcohol consumption, and my reasons for ‘accepting the unacceptable’ are excuses, again, IMO.
The first time I expressed my anger to him, I regretted it, but for the wrong reasons. Based on how violently both he and my Dad had expressed anger (verbally vicious, and physically out of control), I was afraid that that’s what people do when they become angry and I didn’t want to be that way. I didn’t understand that not all people who express anger become verbally or physically abusive.
The second time I verbally exploded at my ex was ‘the last time’. In my particular case, it was very dangerous for me to do that. I certainly wouldn’t suggest anyone do what I did if in a similar position as I was once in. Looking back, I cringe as I can see the potential for things turning out much worse than they actually did.
But, when I view things as they ‘actually unfolded‘ (my HP was watching out for me for sure that night), it was the BEST thing I could have done for myself. I had taken all I could take from him and let him know that in ‘no uncertain terms’. It was my declaration of independence! It was the first day of the rest of my life. Expressing my anger was my catalyst to change!
It was also our very last conversation, and, the last night of our relationship. Looking back, sure, I would have preferred to have a more civil ending…but being ‘civil‘ didn‘t work with my dealings with him before. Standing up for myself , expressing my anger, no longer ‘accepting the unacceptable’ and taking the necessary steps to end the relationship by taking long over-due appropriate action, did!
Currently, I don’t want to be in a position where I feel, or need to express anger everyday. That would be a signal that emotions have piled up because I haven’t dealt with issues effectively. And, I wouldn’t want to take out my frustrations on someone ‘just for the sake of release’ at someone else’s expense.
But, having said that, I also now believe that expressing anger when someone’s actions/words have harmed or disrespected me ‘can’ be healthy, as in a potential catalyst to problem resolution/change. I would however, want to ensure that boundaries/rules are in place and adhered to (i.e., no name calling, no throwing things, no disrespectful words being used, a time-limit for the vent, etc.).
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Stumbling toward happiness
Posts: 4,706
Originally Posted by ICU 
But, having said that, I also now believe that expressing anger when someone’s actions/words have harmed or disrespected me ‘can’ be healthy, as in a potential catalyst to problem resolution/change. I would however, want to ensure that boundaries/rules are in place and adhered to (i.e., no name calling, no throwing things, no disrespectful words being used, a time-limit for the vent, etc.).
I agree with that, ICU. Thanks for stating it so well.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Texas
Posts: 26
In my experience, venting is great as long as you don't expect any changes from the alcoholic/addict.
I have discovered that I can "let him know how I feel" as often as I want and as loudly as I want .... and absolutely nothing changes.
I have discovered that I can "let him know how I feel" as often as I want and as loudly as I want .... and absolutely nothing changes.
Doormat
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mahwah, NJ
Posts: 19
I took him back.
I don't know how I feel about this. Things are already different but at the same time are exactly like before. I keep telling myself that I am young and I have time but why do I continue to waste it with someone that it's just NOT going to happen with?
your responses have been wonderful. thank you so much.
I just feel this odd mix of comfort/ happiness/ anger/ uncertainty. I don't know why I keep putting myself through this. I love him. Much, much more than I should. but then I'll look into his closet and find the pills in his cigar box and the empty bottles at the bottom and I get sick and sad for him. He is one of the most intelligent people i have ever met in my life. but he constantly lets drugs and alcohol bring him down.
basically we decided on this. this is HIS problem. not mine. If he chooses to waste money on rehabs only to go back to drinking, then fine. Im not going to worry about it anymore. If he gets stranded somewhere at three in the morning, he better not call me. Im not here to sort out his messes. I told him this. "if we get back together, I need you to be there for me. I need you to pick up the phone when I call. I need you to listen and I need you to be sober at family events. If youre going to drink and do drugs. fine. i dont care anymore. i am not your mother. but dont you dare drive when you shouldnt and dont come crying to me if you get in a mess."
I know, this is a dumb decision on my part but I do love him. maybe its unhealthy and maybe my family hates me right now but right now, with everything going on in my life I need him.
I don't know how I feel about this. Things are already different but at the same time are exactly like before. I keep telling myself that I am young and I have time but why do I continue to waste it with someone that it's just NOT going to happen with?
your responses have been wonderful. thank you so much.
I just feel this odd mix of comfort/ happiness/ anger/ uncertainty. I don't know why I keep putting myself through this. I love him. Much, much more than I should. but then I'll look into his closet and find the pills in his cigar box and the empty bottles at the bottom and I get sick and sad for him. He is one of the most intelligent people i have ever met in my life. but he constantly lets drugs and alcohol bring him down.
basically we decided on this. this is HIS problem. not mine. If he chooses to waste money on rehabs only to go back to drinking, then fine. Im not going to worry about it anymore. If he gets stranded somewhere at three in the morning, he better not call me. Im not here to sort out his messes. I told him this. "if we get back together, I need you to be there for me. I need you to pick up the phone when I call. I need you to listen and I need you to be sober at family events. If youre going to drink and do drugs. fine. i dont care anymore. i am not your mother. but dont you dare drive when you shouldnt and dont come crying to me if you get in a mess."
I know, this is a dumb decision on my part but I do love him. maybe its unhealthy and maybe my family hates me right now but right now, with everything going on in my life I need him.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: behind the viewfinder...
Posts: 6,278
Originally Posted by briliantdisguis
I know, this is a dumb decision on my part but I do love him. maybe its unhealthy and maybe my family hates me right now but right now, with everything going on in my life I need him.
L
CindeRella is proof that a new pair of shoes can change your life!
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Spreading my wings
Posts: 7,163
ICU I could not agree more with this!
I express myself today in a manner so that I get out what needs to be said without allowing a chance for anger to kick in-This way it is said in a healthy manner-and will not come back to haunt me later on! It takes time but learning to not hold in the feelings anymore has really helped me to grow-
I always keep in my head that ANGER is one letter away from the word DANGER and it maybe a cliche but it works!
Currently, I don’t want to be in a position where I feel, or need to express anger everyday. That would be a signal that emotions have piled up because I haven’t dealt with issues effectively. And, I wouldn’t want to take out my frustrations on someone ‘just for the sake of release’ at someone else’s expense.
But, having said that, I also now believe that expressing anger when someone’s actions/words have harmed or disrespected me ‘can’ be healthy, as in a potential catalyst to problem resolution/change. I would however, want to ensure that boundaries/rules are in place and adhered to (i.e., no name calling, no throwing things, no disrespectful words being used, a time-limit for the vent, etc.).
But, having said that, I also now believe that expressing anger when someone’s actions/words have harmed or disrespected me ‘can’ be healthy, as in a potential catalyst to problem resolution/change. I would however, want to ensure that boundaries/rules are in place and adhered to (i.e., no name calling, no throwing things, no disrespectful words being used, a time-limit for the vent, etc.).
I express myself today in a manner so that I get out what needs to be said without allowing a chance for anger to kick in-This way it is said in a healthy manner-and will not come back to haunt me later on! It takes time but learning to not hold in the feelings anymore has really helped me to grow-
I always keep in my head that ANGER is one letter away from the word DANGER and it maybe a cliche but it works!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 4,290
With everything goining on in your life life you need him?
Just what is there in all this that you need? What can he possibly give you other than pain, drama and madness?
Originally Posted by briliantdisguis
I'll look into his closet and find the pills in his cigar box and the empty bottles at the bottom ....he constantly lets drugs and alcohol bring him down
Keepingmyjoy
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: NY
Posts: 328
brilliant....No one can tell you what is best for you. I will hope that your choice to get back together will bring you the happiness and love you long for. To share with you my story....I left and then we got back together once....now I have left again as things eventually went back to what they were...bad for me. IMHO, please go into this new try with your eyes wide open, and never stop taking care of you.
Hugs and hopes!
Hugs and hopes!
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