aztchr

I've decided I'm going to work on upgrading myself a little to really reflect the true me. For quite awhile, I've settled for many things that didn't really suit me, but seemed frugal or just would make do for awhile.

When I mentioned in an earlier post about not fitting in, I really didn't with that particular group. I may have wanted to, but that would have been settling again and compromising my true self just to go along with the flow.

So I decided to work on upgrading a few things in my life. I'm redecorating a few furniture pieces here and there to fit my own preferences and going to upgrade my wardrobe. I'm worth an upgrade. All within my budget, nothing extravagant, but definitely more my own taste. I love a good bargain, but sometimes it's worth more to get what you really want. Maybe that's my new life metaphor.

Enough of trying to fit in where I really don't. I did that for way too long and for now I just need to accept myself. I am the way I am for a reason. I don't have to settle or be uncomfortable trying to be something different. Those that know the real me will never try to take advantage and will accept me. I don't want to be a chameleon anymore to try to get the approval or acceptance from others. After awhile of doing that, I started to forget who I really am.

Yes, this seems very simple, but for me this is a huge break through of insecurities.

Maybe someone can relate.

MsGolightly

ha, i love it!

i can totally relate. i'm still working on myself every day... learning a bit more about who i really am, and wondering why my personality changes depending on who i'm with at the time. i like now being able to draw the line between who i truly am, and who i am just because it's how others want me to be.

aztchr

This was happening, too many times for me! Then I'd feel bad later when really I was making the choice to keep changing. It's really a lot of unnecessary pressure and effort.

I can see how change is for the better, but not when you overdo it and don't do it for yourself.

denny57

It's not simple at all, aztchr. It's difficult. I think the payoffs are worth it. I predict a year from now you will be in love with yourself!

((()))

elizabeth1979

I love where you are going with this.
Upgrades are my way of telling myself Im worth more.
Whether its shoes, new bedding, or a nicer brand of soy milk, upgrading is good!

Astro

Darn right you are. We all are for that matter. So it'll be like an all-new and improved aztchr? Lol. You go girl!

denny57

I just had this discussion with my sponsor. I'm gearing up to be in a new place soon and we talked about picking something I fall in love with, even if it costs me a little more. That I am worth it.

parentrecovers

love it, aztchr - thanks for sharing - k

aztchr

Thank you to everyone here for supporting me in these new experiences!