how many times do you walk away?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Virginia Beach, VA
Posts: 29
how many times do you walk away?
How many times do you walk away? I suppose as many as it takes!?! I have read post from a year ago and oh the cycles. They admitt it and say it is. So why do i stand there thinking something else will happen. That he will change for the long term. Actually allow me to rephrase I think the word change needs to be removed from my vocabulary. That he will get better and fing a path that leads him in the right direction. I back off for his moment of time he need I sit back I offer conversation when it is good for him. I adjust to his comfort zone to think we have made some ";baby steps" as he calls it. But the only recovery that seems to be making progress is mine. I think after the third go around I have found that I hav the tools I know what to do. It does not take much and I do get lost in trying to focus on him. But I quickly find me again. This time I guess I am realizing that maybe this is just insane. I think what kicks my ass! Pardon me but seriously. 11 years of sobriety and here we go again and i know it is a lifelong effort. But god the cycles are endless. Like watching amovie over and over again. I just feel like a fool. He still stands there with he needs to work on him. Well do it then. And stick to it. I have invilved my daughter this round believeing all he said and what a beautiful production!!!!!!!! But i told him not looking good based on tonights phone call. He is very unsure of to many things. I havent told her anything but when I do there is no more second chance one more time. I WILL NOT allow this **** for her. She canjnto understand it . ALmost funny no more like sad. i will not allow it for my child but I have allowed it or justified why I can do it. Hurt alot less htis time. Al il easier everytime to walk away. I told him same excuses same pattern but when I tell her she will not see him anymore THAT IS IT! I mean really we all come here and support eacother but I think we all agree that the libe must be drawn somewhere no?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: ft. bend texas
Posts: 179
I'm pretty damn scared. I just realized that she backs off drinking (it seems) only when things are getting out of hand and we are having terrible fights about it. But, it always starts up again and I just pray that this cycle doesn't continue indefinitely because it will wear me out eventuallyl One week of no drinking ( or not being caught) followed by several days in a row of drinking until I get very angry about it.
full of hope
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 1,170
That's the cycle all right, Sad. My AH quit for 25 days in a row right before I left and then slammed me full force on day 26.
Free at Last, two things you said really stuck out to me. We have the tools and it's time to draw the line.
Free at Last, two things you said really stuck out to me. We have the tools and it's time to draw the line.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 792
oh free, 11 years of sobriety? gosh, that must be hard to deal with. my A had one year and it devastated me. but you're right, the cycles are neverending. you think it's finally over and it's just not.
as for how many times you walk away, i guess it differs for everyone. walking away was very hard for me, lots of threats that i never followed through on, lots of selfishness on my part.
as for how many times you walk away, i guess it differs for everyone. walking away was very hard for me, lots of threats that i never followed through on, lots of selfishness on my part.
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