TexasGirl

Oopsie....take back.

Jazzman

I'm starting to not worry so much about any perceived image as a "bad guy". Kinda falls short when it comes to my own happiness. I've been too nice for too long anyway.

I would let him know where he stands short and sweet then wrap this up.....

minnie

Gosh, there a lots of things coming out of this thread that really could do with their own threads.

Like Jazz, I am not bothered about some unhealthy person like my ex thinking I am the bad guy. I know I am not. I have some boundary-setting issues with all of my immediate family at the moment, however, which is causing me some disquiet. I think I needed to think about this tomight, so thank you.

TexasGirl

I'm sorry I keep posting....this thread does keep taking turns. I'm just having a barrage of revelations. Gotta love those.

When I read CEGirls post, my first thought was addicted to drama? What the heck does that mean??? How could someone be addicted to drama? Then I started thinking......and thinking some more.....and I think this kind of leads out of her statement.

I say I'm done, but I don't totally make it happen. Why would I do that? Maybe "being the bad guy" is just that...an excuse. I'm still feeling this out, so I don't know that I'm nailing it completely, but my first thought is that I like the attention of "dealing with this," the this, I assume, being his drama. Is that martyrdom??

Yikes, that's a big pair of shoes to try on.....

denny57

TG, do you really think you might change your mind? I've had the thinking I believe you're describing, but I knew in my heart it was just the letting go.

((()))

TexasGirl

No, Denny, I don't think at all that I might change mind. Hmmm....good point. Maybe it is just the letting go. I'm all over the place....geez, you guys are patient. I just haven't quite shut it all the way....just almost. All this self-examination....I think now I over self-examine!

Thanks for listening to me, as looney as I may be.....

CE Girl

Excuse me for being so blunt,,

But, you bet your ARSE it is,,,,lol

You know what? Being addicted to drama only really affects us when it AFFECTS us. God, let me tell ya, if I'm at the scene of an accident and the car is on fire, I'm gonna go diving in!!! Is that martydom? Or a heroic act? I tell ya one thing, it certainly IS drama,,LOL

Point is, us codies, we got BIG OLE HEARTS!! Problem is, when we add dysfunction in our lives, it gets turned on us. What could be a "good" trait, turns to one of addiction and obsession. oftentimes we can't see the forest through the trees.

TG, you know me, you know I LOVE you, but I'm gonna be honest.

I think your stuck in the forest

Is it over or not?

Peace

minnie

When I split up with R, I was done. It never even entered my head that there was any way back from that decision. However, he managed to convince himself that I had said the "let's seperate for 6 months and see what happens then" thing, even when I moved 220 MILES AWAY AND REFUSED TO TALK TO HIM ABOUT ANYTHING OTHER THAN WORK!!!! How the heck did that happen? Well, leaving aside the fact that he lives on his own planet, I realised that I was giving him subtle signs that I was still emotionally involved with him. I was, but not in the way he thought - although I guess an emotional connection is an emotional connection, however negative. (Actually, having written that, I do remember screaming at him down the phone at some point months later, which could never be described as subtle.)

He only stopped when I issued court proceedings and refused to speak to him other than through a lawyer. Although, bizarrely, he was the one who instigated that, but in hindsight I can see how he wanted the "business" stuff dealt with by a third party so he could keep trying on the personal.

What am I trying to say? Lol, I have no idea! You probably owe it to both of you to vocalise where your thinking is at. Bottom line - do you want him back?